wossname

For all of you who ordered this special edition of Clacks last year and were wondering why it never arrived, here be an update from the Backspindle lads:

Collector's Clacks is shipping soon! And we can't wait to get our copy!

Finally, after months of challenges with the restrictions, shortages in materials and quality checks we are delighted to bring you brilliant news! The Collector's Edition of Clacks games are being assembled and will be shipping to us from China in early January 2022. Once received, we will get them to you as soon as possible. Our objective is to have them to all of our pre-order customers by the beginning of March, before they become available in the shops. Initially each game was to include 'one' of five limited edition bookmarks, but as we appreciate you all have had to be so patient during these strange times, we have decided that each pre-order copy from our website will have a 'complete set of five' bookmarks included.

We thought you'd like to see a clean copy of the box image. At this time we'd like especially to thank Rob, Ian, Rachel and Jason for their input into the design creation. It is very much appreciated.

The Collector's Edition of Clacks is actually the five year anniversary edition too! Also in January we will do the draw for the 1st Edition copy of Guards! Guards! A Discworld boardgame. One of you is going to be very lucky indeed!

We will update you all on more accurate delivery timescales once the games land in the UK.

PLEASE NOTE: If your postal address address has changed since placing your order, or will change by the beginning of March 2022, please drop us an email to info@backspindlegames.com or backspindle@gmail.com advising of any changes.

Wossname
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
December 2021 (Volume 24, Issue 12, Post 1)

********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a free publication offering news, reviews, and all the other stuff-that-fits pertaining to the works of Sir Terry Pratchett. Originally founded by the late, great Joe Schaumburger for members of the worldwide Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North American Discworld Society and other continental groups, Wossname is now for Discworld and Pratchett fans everywhere in Roundworld.
********************************************************************

Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
News Editor: Vera P
Newshounds: Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow, Mss C, Alison not Aliss
Staff Writers: Asti, Pitt the Elder, Evil Steven Dread, Mrs Wynn-Jones
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Annie Mac, Drusilla D'Afanguin, Your Name Here
Puzzle Editor: Tiff (still out there somewhere)
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
Emergency Staff: Steven D'Aprano, Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare time)

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INDEX:

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH
02) EDITOR'S LETTER
03) ODDS AND SODS
04) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
05) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS
06) ROUNDWORLD TALES: KEN THE CLEVER LIBRARIAN
07) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
08) CLOSE

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01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH

"It's a delight for me to bring back characters we loved (or hated) and bring in new characters, from the shiniest top floors of Heaven to the dankest basements of Hell, to love (or to hate, or to love to hate or hate to love). All of them are part of the strange and unusually beloved family of Good Omens."
– Neil Gaiman, on casting Good Omens 2

"We have already welcomed to the Good Omens 2 family familiar faces in familiar roles, familiar faces in unfamiliar roles, and unfamiliar faces in unfamiliar roles. We also have an unfamiliar face in a familiar role."
– Douglas Mackinnon, on once again directing it

"I’m honoured to voice the footnotes and bring to life one of the funniest, quirkiest and best-loved aspects of Terry Pratchett’s world. He added footnotes to the pages of all of his Discworld novels. They are his personal commentary on the action, little snippets of information or funny asides. They feel very much like the voice of the great man himself commenting on the action. I’ve enjoyed it enormously."
– Bill Nighy, on taking the part of all the footnotes in the new versions of the Discworld audiobooks

"Coming back to Terry Pratchett’s world after many years has been a pleasure. I loved his subversive, absurdist humour when I was a teenager and reading the part of Death, who appears in nearly all the Discworld books, has given me a renewed appreciation of his comic genius. What a very clever writer he was!"
– Peter Serafinowicz, soon to be Death (read that carefully!)

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02) LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR

Well now, here we are at the end of a very long and unsettled year and about to start another one – which in Discworld terminology will be the Year of the Lachrymating Leveret!

Have you seen the trailer for The Abominable Snow Baby yet? It's delightful! And in a few days, on Christmas Day, the film will get its first airing (see item 3.0). We can expect that The Abominable Snow Baby will become a yearly tradition for holiday viewing.

While I quite like Jon Hamm and am pleased to see him returning as Gabriel to the continuation of Good Omens, I'm far more excited to note that Michael McKean and Miranda Richardson will also be in the new series (though not necessarily as Shadwell and Madame Tracy... stay tuned... and meanwhile, read item 3.1).

Here be a long Twitter thread by Pratchett biographer Marc Burrows on the evolution of The Carpet People. Start here: https://bit.ly/3JjWNq2

And now, on with the show...

– Annie Mac, Editor

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03) ODDS AND SODS

3.0 ABOMINABLE SNOW BABY NEWS

The trailer! And rather wonderful it is too: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8YPc8YSzKds

From the Radio Times:

"Channel 4 has unveiled its schedule for the festive season and Christmas Day, which includes Terry Pratchett’s The Abominable Snow Baby and special Christmas editions of First Dates, Gogglebox, Come Dine with Me and The Great British Bake Off. Based on Terry Pratchett’s 2014 story about a 14-foot-tall Abominable Snow Baby that arrives in a small English town, the animated Christmas special stars Julie Walters, Hugh Dancy and David Harewood, and will air on Channel 4 on Christmas Day at 7:30pm. Channel 4’s Head of Drama, Caroline Hollick, said in a statement: “Channel 4’s original Christmas animation has become a real highlight over the years and this year will be no exception. I’m delighted Julie Walters, Hugh Dancy and David Harewood will be bringing to life this wonderful, funny and moving yuletide tale."

https://bit.ly/3q90B4A

...and Channel Ten in Fourecks

"If you’re looking for a fun and adventurous story, then this delightful adaptation is for you! Discover Terry Pratchett’s fantastical world of Blackbury with a huge snowfall, and the appearance of an adorable Abominable Snow Baby. This is sure to be your new Christmas classic!"

https://bit.ly/3phVHmB

Julie Walters talks about voicing the character of "Granny" in The Abominable Snow Baby:

"[Channel 4] has drafted in some big names to lend their voices to the programme. One of those stars is Julie Walters, who takes on the role of 98-year-old Granny – and in this week’s episode of the Radio Times podcast, she told Jane Garvey how she went about voicing such an elderly character. 'Well, I’ve played ancient people since I was in my twenties,' she said. 'I don’t know why, I just feel attracted to them. I always think it’s because I was brought up with my grandmother who was a bit doolally tap, and so had a massive influence on us as children. And so I think some of it is trying to solve the conundrum of my grandmother when I was a child. So I’m fascinated by old people,' she added. 'Of course, I am one now, so it’s different… but it isn’t that different. I love the way that people… their shape changes, and of course their voice and everything about them changes. In terms of voice, I’m a bit of an impersonator, and I notice how, you know, old people’s voices… their vocal cords become thin and they age just like everything else. But what was lovely about Granny is that, yes, she was 98, but she’s absolutely full of energy and goodness and love. She’s just fantastic – I hope I’m like that at 98, if I ever get there!'..."

https://bit.ly/3qiX0Rl

3.1 GOOD OMENS 2 NEWS

Jon Hamm is confirmed to return as the Archangel Gabriel in Good Omens 2, along with co-angels Doon Mackichan (Michael), Gloria Obianyo (Uriel), Liz Carr (Saraqael), and Quelin Sepulveda (Muriel). Other returning cast members – not necessarily in the same roles, though! – include Michael McKean, Miranda Richardson, Reece Shearsmith, Nina Sosanya, Maggie Service, and Paul Adeyefa.

There's a Narrativia announcement covering this. Go to https://narrativia.com/go2.html to read it in its entirety.

3.2 AUDIOBOOKS DO-OVER

Penguin Random House are going to re-record all 40 of their Discworld audiobooks, "featuring a cast of leading names from British stage and screen" that includes Bill Nighy as the footnotes, Peter Serafinowicz as Death, and "one main narrator set to voice each subseries" – Indira Varma for the Witches books, Sian Clifford for the Death books, Colin Morgan for the Wizards books, and best of all, Andy Serkis for Small Gods!

"BAFTA award-winning composer James Hannigan, whose many credits include music for the Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince and the Lord of the Rings video games, and the audio production of The Sandman, has been commissioned to compose theme tunes for the Discworld series. For this ambitious project narrators will read nearly four million words, with nearly 150 days in the studio and resulting in over 400 hours of finished audio. The audiobooks are being produced and directed by Neil Gardner of Ladbroke Audio, the multiple award-winning radio writer & director, who shares a love of sci-fi and comedy, and is a life-long Terry Pratchett superfan..."

The new recordings will be published over the course of the next two years: Witches (April 2022), Wizards (July 2022), Death (October 2022), Moist von Lipwig (February 2023) and City Watch and Tiffany Aching (April 2023). "The standalone titles – Pyramids, Small Gods, The Truth,Moving Pictures, The Amazing Maurice and Monstrous Regiment – will also be published..."

https://narrativia.com/audio.html

3.3 SIR PTERRY'S FAVOURITE VIDEO GAME

An in-depth portrait of The Author as a young... thief? By Rick Lane for the Guardian:

"Pratchett’s relationship with video games is well documented. Always technologically savvy, he was an early adopter of PC gaming, and enjoyed everything from Doom to Deus Ex and Call of Duty. He even helped to create a mod (an unofficial add-on) for The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion, writing lines of dialogue for a character. But Pratchett held a particular affection for Thief. He played all three games in the series, and often contributed to a Usenet newsgroup named alt.games.thief-dark-project. That newsgroup, analogous to a modern forum, has long since been deactivated, but its posts survive in a Google groups archive. Combined, they provide a fascinating record of Pratchett’s evolving relationship with both the Thief series and video games in general... Pratchett liked that Thief II was a game that you could finish without killing anyone, which appealed to his personal morals. 'I get edgy in games that require killing as an objective,' he wrote in July 2002. 'But being able to hide from guards who appear to have amazing acuity sometimes is a talent in itself.' He also liked that Thief II let you solve its problems at your own pace, and in your own way. 'I think a game goes wrong when you start to fight the programmer rather than the game...'

"There was shared lineage between Thief’s nameless city and Pratchett’s own work in the Discworld novels. Both take popular fantasy tropes and recontextualise them into a more human world, unafraid to explore the weirder edges of fantasy. Thief’s bumbling, grumbling guards share certain traits with Pratchett’s own motley crew of city watchmen... Pratchett’s presence on the forums did not go unnoticed by the wider community. 'Having Terry involved was a very cool experience,' says David Geelan, an associate professor at Australia’s Griffith University, and a contributor to the alt.games Thief forum during the same period as Pratchett. 'This was an early example of an author I was a big fan of engaging with something else I loved.” This sentiment is shared by another user, Mika Latokartano. “Being a big fan of Discworld novels, it was naturally great to see him on the forums and to be able to exchange a few words with a world-famous author...' Pratchett’s posts on the alt.games Thief forum are a unique record. Not only do they evidence in detail an artist’s heartfelt affection for another type of art, they also represent a mode of interaction between a creator and fans that is far less viable in the age of mass social media. Geelan, who around this time also frequented a cyberpunk forum visited by William Gibson, notes that 'authors could react more directly with the few hundred or couple of thousand people who might have been on a web forum or usenet group in the mid 90s, than with the millions or tens of millions who would want that contact now...'..."

https://bit.ly/3mpjAqy

3.4 JOHNNY MAXWELL REVISITED

It's good to see the Johnny Maxwell series (Only You Can Save Mankind, Johnny And The Dead, Johnny And The Bomb) getting a 21st century shout-out! This little gem was originally posted in 2015, but always worth an action replay.

By Andrew Blair on Den of Geek:

"In the lower reaches of the Goodreads list of Pratchett books, besides the short stories and essays in anthologies, the first novel to stand out is Only You Can Save Mankind, the first of Pratchett’s Johnny Maxwell series. It was published in 1992. It is a very 1992 book (One of the characters asks 'Is it rad to say cool?'), and realistic swearing is not a feature. Compared with later books featuring Johnny Maxwell it’s a bit on the nose in its depiction of children, but the intention – to depict a variety of backgrounds and relatable struggles – lays the foundations for the subtler sequels... The most interesting thing about Only You Can Save Mankind were its observations on empathy and detachment with regards moving images, but its ending counteracts the popular aphorism by stating that violence does solve some things. It might seem surprising in the context of the book, but then Pratchett has disposed of monsters with poetic abandon since... Johnny And The Dead followed in 1993. Again mixing lofty themes and fantasy with the mundane, the main characters feel a bit more realistic here. Here the ’90s feeling is different: it’s a book clearly set in and evocative of that time period, rather than a book that is evocative of how adults wrote children in that time period... Johnny and the Dead asks the reader to consider something they might see in their everyday life, to look beyond the surface of it and ask questions. It goes one step further, again, with its ending, where the dead stop waiting around for the next stage of their afterlives to happen... All of Johnny’s friends get satisfying character development in the third and final book in the series, Johnny And The Bomb. This book, especially, with its mentions of the Trousers of Time and “Millennium hand and shrimp,” complements ideas in the Discworld universe, almost like a primer. That these come from a character called Mrs Tachyon may be entirely deliberate, as a theoretical time-travelling particle has echoes of both this book and the existence of something like the Discworld. While the ending might be the most straightforwardly heroic of the three books, Johnny’s friends are put into the midst of the fantastic more than in any other story..."

https://bit.ly/3H11lPT

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04) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

Some reviews of Discworld plays to finish the year! The Roundworld debut of Murder in Ankh-Morpork; Wyrd Sisters and Hogfather in EcksEcksEcksEcks; and Going Postal in Sussex (which only has one ecks).

* MURDER IN ANKH-MORPORK IN ABINGDON

By Alice Nuttall for the Daily Info:

"The play had a strong opener, with one of Pratchett’s best-known exchanges brought alive on the stage (two members of a secret society exchanging code phrases, before realising that one of them meant to attend another clandestine meeting a few doors down). The cast matched the story’s fast pace with energy and enthusiasm, each member fully inhabiting their roles. Anna Wilson stood out as Angua, a werewolf police officer trying not to scare off a new friend with the revelation of her wild side; Nigel Tait made a hilarious Nobby Nobbs, a character that can be hard to do justice to, thanks to his often grotesque depiction in the books; and Briggs was amusingly chilling as Lord Vetinari (whose entries on stage, accompanied by the Imperial March from Star Wars, always got a laugh from the audience). Adapting Men At Arms for a small stage would have been a challenge – the story takes place over several locations in a large city, and follows a complex police procedural plot with Christie-esque twists and turns – but the ensemble managed it expertly, creating a show that was full of in-jokes and nods for fans while still being exciting and engaging for newbies..."

...and on the same site by Naomi Anna Lillian Webb

"Outside the spoken dialogue, sound and music are cleverly interspersed throughout the action in a manner absolutely in keeping with the spirit of the novels, to the great amusement of the audience. I suspect some ingenious sound recording techniques came into play, putting me in mind of the beloved BBC Radiophonic Workshop (of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy fame). In an inspired move we are even treated to a rousing rendition of the Ankh-Morpork National Anthem during one of the early scenes, beautifully performed by Lindsay Rolland and written by Carl Davis, CBE. Lindsay also plays Boffo the clown, just one example of the abundant versatility and talent on offer in the STC... The choice to combine the plot with characters from novels other than Men at Arms gives rise to an admirably diverse cast, a dream for any theatre troupe. Sam Vimes (Jamie Mortimer) visibly grows into his role of hardened Captain of the City Watch throughout the course of the play, his arc is impressively presented given the confines evident when converting a novel to much shorter media. Patrician, Lord Vetinari (Stephen Briggs), eyebrows a-wiggling, tasks the captain with uncovering the truth behind a vicious multiple murder featuring clowns, assassins, and a mysterious unknown weapon. Vimes is assisted at every turn by his devoted fiancé, the formidable Lady Sybil Ramkin: Elena Mortimer assertively commands the scene whenever she is present. The Captain is also supported by his loyal band of Night Watchmen-women-and-others. Anna Wilson as werewolf Lance Constable Angua von Uberwald is especially strong, effortlessly conveying complex nuances of character. She parries with the charming honesty of Corporal Carrot Ironfoundersson (Peter Hubbard) while they explore their roles, both in the Watch and in love. Comic timing abounds with the pairing of Mike MacDonald as Sergeant Fred Colon and Nigel Tait as Corporal Nobby Nobbs. Their double act is worthy of Shakespeare, and often far more amusingly expounded to the modern audience..."

https://bit.ly/3mp1vZv

* WYRD SISTERS IN ADELAIDE

By Christine Pyman for Broadway World:

"Unseen Theatre Company is celebrating its 21st birthday this year, and it's been interesting to watch its development and maturation... The company showed sophisticated stagecraft which shone against the minimalist sets and lighting, focusing attention on the acting, and there was some terrific acting. Stand out stars were Aimee Ford as the selfish, bullying, inherently evil, and frighteningly believable Duchess, Danny Sag, as the Fool, almost stealing the stage whenever he was on, and not because of the brightness of his wonderful costume, Philip Lineton, with passion and fire as the Chamberlain, and Pamela Munt, who simply is Granny Weatherwax. Alycia Rabig was suitably 'wet-hen-ish', with a surprising core of iron (possibly from a frying pan), as Magrat Garlick, the youngest witch, and Natalie Haigh provided a comforting, but naughty Nanny Ogg. Paul Messenger has presence, even when playing a presence, and managed to be a convincingly dead King Verence, cleverly being apparently an apparition, present only to the audience, and witches (and cats of course)..."

https://bit.ly/3296tD7

...and by Matthew Hocter for Theatre Travels:

"Minimalism doesn’t always work in theatre, especially when the theme has a heavy focus on elements like magic and fantasy, but much credit to the creators of this play, everything seemed to flow just right... Like any Shakespearean play, twists and turns are in abundance and with Pratchett’s incredible eye, The Wyrd Sisters is a foray into everything from propaganda, relationships and time itself. With standout performances from Philip Lineton as Chamberlain, Danny Sag as The Fool and the hilarious aforementioned Natalie Haigh as Nanny Ogg, this production was anything but amateur. Timing and a strong comedic element all aided in creating something truly magical and at its core, showing that things are not always as they seem, never more evident than in the words 'History is what people are told.' Unseen Theatre Company is celebrating its 21st anniversary this year and if this production is anything to go by, the next 21 years look brilliant..."

https://bit.ly/3EjwLiW

* GOING POSTAL IN SUSSEX

By Cat Quigley for the Bishop's Stortford Independent:

"Director Becky Deal is to be commended for daring to venture into this steampunk fantasy comedy and introducing people to this great story. The term ‘going postal’ – meaning to become extremely and uncontrollably angry, usually in the workplace – is a great metaphor for the storyline. Deal had a strong cast that did a fantastic job delivering humour, drama and fast-flowing character work which kept moving until the end. Jack Stevens brought Moist Von Lipwig to life as an endearing yet cunning conman. He was perfect in this role, word perfect with spot-on comedic timing and physical gestures, and he brought a great, mischievous likeability to the role... Sophie O'Flaherty shone as Drumknott. She was a stand-out performer, with a well-executed stage voice and chemistry with her fellow cast members... Parole officer Mr Pump (Doug Sheppard) was a convincing golem made of clay, who, like any government official, was tireless in his sense of duty. Mr Pump had a lot of emotional moments and Sheppard was able to act out a real blend of naivete, fierce loyalty and deep wisdom, particularly in the poignant moments where he protected Moist Von Lipwig... A lot of the play was interjected with energy from some of the smaller roles, which were just as important as the main parts as they kept the pace moving... A big highlight for me was a TV that came to life showing a character Collabone played by Matthew Barnes... The production was largely helped by the fantastic tech from production manager Will Jamieson and sound and lighting by Steve Cherry, who managed to create the dark moods of the play... The audience really enjoyed the show, and Pratchett fans responded to the deeper meanings of the book while those who didn’t know the book well were still amused and entertained..."

https://bit.ly/3yNGTz7

* HOGFATHER IN PERTH, FOURECKS

By Kimberley Shaw for Stage Whispers:

"One of the biggest difficulties of the Discworld plays is that they are highly episodic. This production works well to overcome this issue, using an extended stage and putting some scenes around the auditorium, allowing transitions to be swift and effective. Young actors Callan Emmerson and Ellie Jones, who also nicely play children Gawain and Twyla Gaiter, also "sign-post” many scenes, so that we know where we are in the Discworld. Epic character Death is played with great gravitas and wry humour by a wonderfully costumed Sam Barnett. He is well assisted by Ian Banks as butler Albert, in a picture-perfect portrayal. The real heroine of this story, though, is Susan Story Hellit[sic] – very nicely played, with lovely nuance, by Pratchett veteran Michelle Ezzy. Another Pratchett ‘expert’ is Peter ‘Pear’ Carr, reprising his role as the delightfully dim Banjo, one of the thugs employed by assassin Teatime to help kill the Hogfather, a role that Pear played in the WA premiere of Hogfather eighteen years ago - and a role he plays to perfection. He is ably supported by Curig Jenkins as Medium Dave and Candice Preston as Chickenwire. Villain of the piece, Mr Teatime, is given lovely menace by Aaron O’Neill... Lots of delightful characters in this, with many performers playing multiple roles and distinguishing them well..."

https://www.stagewhispers.com.au/reviews/hogfather

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05) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS

...will return next year, since we're now already into "Hogswatch break" territory. Here's hoping that 2022 will finally see a return to safer meet-ups!

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06) ROUNDWORLD TALES: THE ADVENTURES OF KEN ALLEN

Wossname has featured amazing Roundworld Orangutans before, but have you ever heard of the famous escape artist known as Ken? Son of proud parents Maggie and Bob, Ken was born in 1971 at the San Diego Zoo. While he was happy in his human-built home, he was obviously not just another meek ape...

"In his nursery, Ken would unscrew every nut that he could find and remove the bolts. Keepers would no sooner put them back when he would be at it again. Nor could he ever be kept in his room... In fact, when Ken was first moved into the Heart of the Zoo exhibit, he was caught throwing rocks at a television crew that was filming the neighboring gorillas..." But what Ken really wanted was a bit of a wander. In June of 1985, he escaped and happily joined the human visitors looking at the other zoo residents. Despite his keepers spending a lot of time and money escape-proofing his home, he did it again in July and August – and then started encouraging his housemate Vicki to do the same! And that was far from Ken's last escape; he even managed to encourage another housemate, Kumang, into escaping (and this clever lass figured out how to nullify the electric fencing around their enclosure).

In all his adventures, Ken Allen never harmed any zookeepers or members of the public. Ken died of cancer in December 2000, but his legend lives on – and we've learned from his escapades that orangutans are even brighter and more observant than previously thought.

Sources: https://bit.ly/3sm83vW and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ken_Allen

Also, here be "The Ballad of Ken Allen": https://bit.ly/3FyiqRf

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08) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

Memory lane: an excellent Adora Belle and Moist from Ooook Productions' staging of Going Postal:
https://bit.ly/3HIrsfR

Part of the cast of the Roleystone Theatre's recent production of Hogfather: https://bit.ly/3edPj9O

A scrap of the shooting script for Good Omens 2, as posted by Neil Gaiman: https://bit.ly/3cQsQ1F

A very large Snow Baby – or a very small Julie Walters: https://bit.ly/3yM2Hv0

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09) CLOSE

...and that's it for December. Wossname wishes all our Readers a safe and happy Hogswatch season! Take care, mind how you go, and we'll see you next year. May it be a better one than the previous two years have been...

– Annie Mac

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The End. If you have any questions or requests, write: wossname-owner (at) pearwood (dot) info

Copyright (c) 2021 by Wossname for the Klatchian Foreign Legion

Wossname
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
December 2020 (Volume 23, Issue 12, Post 1)

********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a free publication offering news, reviews, and all the other stuff-that-fits pertaining to the works of Sir Terry Pratchett. Originally founded by the late, great Joe Schaumburger for members of the worldwide Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North American Discworld Society and other continental groups, Wossname is now for Discworld and Pratchett fans everywhere in Roundworld.
********************************************************************

Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
News Editor: Vera P
Newshounds: Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow, Mss C, Alison not Aliss
Staff Writers: Asti, Pitt the Elder, Evil Steven Dread, Mrs Wynn-Jones
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Annie Mac, Drusilla D'Afanguin, Your Name Here
Puzzle Editor: Tiff (still out there somewhere)
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
Emergency Staff: Steven D'Aprano, Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare time)

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

INDEX:

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH
02) EDITOR'S LETTER
03) HOGSWATCH CAROLS
04) ODDS AND SODS
05) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
06) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS
07) AROUND THE BLOGOSPHERE
08) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
09) CLOSE

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01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH

"If J.R.R. Tolkien took LSD, thought of Death as a guy who takes his job very seriously, and wrote satire with a honed edge of honesty that cuts deep and bleeds truth, he actually would have been Terry Pratchett in disguise. I’m not saying Terry Pratchett did drugs, but I am saying that the ideas that fueled his brain took other authors like Stephen King years of snorting cocaine to imagine."
– blogger frankfiction's interesting take on the genius of Pratchett

"Wherever people are obtuse and absurd... and wherever they have, by even the most generous standards, the attention span of a small chicken in a hurricane and the investigative ability of a one-legged cockroach... and wherever people are inanely credulous, thematically attached to the certainties of the nursery and, in general, have as much grasp of the realities of the physical universe as an oyster has of mountaineering... yes, Twyla: there is a Hogfather."
– Hogfather, of course

"One should always be wary of people who talk unashamedly of “fellowship and good cheer” as if it were something that can be applied to life like a poultice."
– ibid.

"HUMAN BEINGS MAKE LIFE SO INTERESTING. DO YOU KNOW, THAT IN A UNIVERSE SO FULL OF WONDERS, THEY HAVE MANAGED TO INVENT BOREDOM."
– the... *other* Hogfather

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02) LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR

Are you ready to welcome the Year of the Beleaguered Badger? We can only hope that despite the name, it will be less beleaguered than the Year of the Condescending Carp has been! That remains to be seen, but I think we all deserve a good holiday and a drop (or many) of vintage scumble for making it through.

Librarians – and orangutan lovers – around the world can celebrate the first Discworld-named baby ape! See item 4.3.

To our readers and their families and friends, warmest Wossname wishes for the happiest possible Hogswatch and a Covid-free new year! And now, on with the show...

– Annie Mac, Editor

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03) HOGSWATCH CAROLS

It's been a long time since we opened the Weird Alice songbook. Here's a song to warm the cockles of your Discly hearts...

A FAIRYTALE OF OLD ANKH

A PRISONER IN THE PALACE DUNGEONS:
It was Hogswatch Eve, mate
Down in old Ankh
A chained mime said to me
'Won't learn another word!'
And then he sang a song:
The hedgehog's point of view
I turned twice Widdershins
And dream'd of hot stoo

Got Raven's lucky beak -
See, Death of Rats says SQUEAK
A slate is running
In Biers for me and you
So Happy Hogswatch
From Dots and Sadie
Making Morpork free of crime
And nightmares all come true...

TWOFLOWER:
They've got gnolls big as trolls
They've got wizards in robes
But the smell goes right through you
There's no rest for your nose
When we walked round the Shades
On that cold Hogswatch night
You promised me Ankh-Morpork vampires don't bite

VARIOUS MEMBERS OF THE BEGGARS' AND THIEVES' GUILDS:
'You were Bursar – '
'You were jolly...'
'You stank like Queen Molly!'
When the minstrels stopped playing
We set them alight
Piss Harry's 'collecting'
Mossy Lawn, he's dissecting
We ate Dibbler's meat pies
And retched through the night

EVERYONE:
The boys from the YMPA Choir
Were singing sourly
And Dark Morris bells rang out
For Hogswatch Eve.

NOBBY AND COLON:
'You're a Fool, a nut-case.'
'You're a civic disgrace,
'Swigging Bearhugger's booze
'Till you hoick on your shoes!'
'You Lancre sheep-shagger...'
'You unlicensed Beggar'
'Happy Hogswatch, you Nobbs – '
'Hope the Gods shut yer gob!'

EVERYONE:
The cops of the Day and Night Watch Choir
Committed harmony
And Dark Morris bells rang out
For Hogswatch Eve.

DUKE FELMET: 'I could've ruled the Disc...'
DUCHESS FELMET: 'Well, so could any twit!
'You took my crown from me
'When ghosts unmanned you...'
DUKE: 'I killed for Lancre, dear
'I grabbed it for our own...'
DUCHESS: 'I'd rather stand alone!'
ALL LANCRE TOGETHER: 'But we could never stand you!'

EVERYONE:
The ghouls from the Bel-Shamharoth Choir
Were howling tunelessly
And Dark Morris bells rang out
For Hogswatch Eve!

[Editor's note: this is not the greatest Hogswatch carol in the world – this is just a tribute (SNH, SNH, SNH). I always had a horror of the sickly sweetness of most carols until the original of this one came along. For those of you unacquainted with its dyspeptic, misanthropic wonderfulness, get yourself to the nearest Anterweb and hunt it down – you won't be sorry! HO HO HO.]

*

And something slightly more traditional...

WE THREE HAGS: ANE HOGSWATCHE CAROL

NANNY, GRANNY AND MAGRAT:
We three Hags Lancrastian are
Straddling brooms, we travel afar
Hearth and privy, pub and smithy
Casting our spells bizarre

Ohh...
Stars of Lancre, stern in black
Dames in regal pointy hats
Hubwards breezing, nethers freezing
Witches three who've got the knack

VERENCE:
Born a Fool, yet destined to reign
Never cruel though sometimes a pain
King well-meaning -- New Age-leaning
Sensible, in the main

Ohh...
Star of Lancre, staunch and meek
Castle sanitation geek
Bells a-clinking, forward-thinking
Modernising farm techniques

MAGRAT:
Frank but senseless, soppy am I
Wrinkled gowns and head in the sky
Sweet tomfool'ry, occult jewellery
'Wet as a hen,' they sigh

Ohh...
Star of Lancre, star-crossed Queen
Star of herbal research scene
Keen defender, nappy-mender
Keeping Ynci's armour clean

NANNY:
Scumble mine, 'tis boozy perfume
Breath like fire can clear a big room
Girlish spirit, bawling lyrics
Bawdy and rude -- boom-boom!

Ohh...
Star of Lancre, super-Gran
Head of matriarchal clan
Crude and chummy, Greebo's Mummy
Who can fix things? Nanny can!

GRANNY:
Hogswatch parties? Sausages fat?
Ha! I can't be having with that!
Bees I'll borrow near and far, so
I can patrol my patch

ALL:
Ohh...
Stars of Lancre, wyrd and wise
We've no need to advertise
Maiden, mother, and the... other
Guarding all 'neath Lancre's skies!

*

...and a bit of seasonal poetry...

HOGGERWATCHY

Twas Hogswatch, and the savvy youths
Did slyly grin as sleep they feigned
All tinselled were the icy roofs
And the Hogfather reigned

'Beware the pig-shaped choccy buns!
'The drunken fights, the booze'd collapse!
'Beware the lemon curd, and shun
'Voluminous brandy-snaps!'

We took our chunder-cures in hand
Pork rinds and sausage pie we bought
Then rested we as the clock struck three
And had a wily thought

And as we hid, with prying eyes
The Hogfather (with list of names)
Came jingling through the wintry skies
HO. HO. HO. as he came!

One-two, one-two! The ham's sliced through!
Its charcoaled skin was bright as chrome
We played Charades, then thanked the Gods
And went galumphing home

'And hast thou drained the scumble-pot?
'Don't be alarmed, my wee pished bairn!'
O scabrous daze, me head's all glazed!
We mortals never learn...

Twas Hogswatch, and the savvy youths
Did slyly grin as sleep they feigned
All tinselled were the icy roofs
And the Hogfather reigned.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

04) ODDS AND SODS

4.1 PENGUIN COMPETITION

No, not a competition to win a penguin, but rather one to win a special copy of The Time-travelling Caveman from Penguin Books:

"This year hasn’t exactly been the best year for the adventurous among us, has it? Trips, explorations and mind-blowing ventures have all been put on hold. Luckily, Terry Pratchett's brand new compendium of short stories, The Time-travelling Caveman, illustrated by Mark Beech, is bursting to the brim with ideas and imagination. Written for local newspapers when Terry Pratchett was a young lad, these never previously published stories are packed full of anarchic humour and wonderful wit. We have 3x special edition copies to giveaway. To enter, email us with where in the Discworld you'd most like to escape to and why.
A winner will be picked at random on Monday 4th January 2021."

To enter, go to http://penguin-group.msgfocus.com/q/11m9iRLy1WunsJ0I3tGyISL/wv and press the ENTER button below the text quote above here

4.2 UPDATES: THE TERRY PRATCHETT BOOK CLUB

On the website of publishers Tor, Emmet Asher-Perrin continues a Discworld discussion page. This month's instalment takes us most of the way through Wyrd Sisters:

"The Fool’s role in giving Felmet the idea of how to turn the people against the witches is extremely unsettling because Pratchett knows plenty about the actual history of witch hunts and is bringing that knowledge to bear here. But it’s more unsettling because those methods are still used today, even in fiction; I was immediately put in mind of what the Tenth Doctor did to Harriet Jones after she disappointed him, tanking her entire political career with the words “Don’t you think she looks tired?” And that was done pointedly, intentionally, with the knowledge of how many women’s lives and careers are destroyed by rumor and hearsay. It’s the reason why Granny is so adamant about them maintaining their respect – and she’s right. Without it, they’ll be turned on in an instant..."

https://bit.ly/34gQSPH

"The Fool is trying to show the duke and duchess that they can turn an entire kingdom against the witches simply by putting the idea in people’s heads that they are untrustworthy. And it works, of course, because words do have the power to shape thought, particularly amongst people who are frightened or concerned about their ability to survive; that’s how witch trials come about in the first place. But there’s an interesting moment here when the Fool thinks that what he’s doing with the duke and words has to be better ultimately than swords and fighting – which sounds so sensible, even if it is utterly wrong. And that’s likely because this Fool wasn’t truly meant to be a Fool..."

https://bit.ly/3ajhWBt

"We’re getting the set up for Tomjon, and Pratchett is sneakily showing his hand here in the conversation between Hwel and Vitoller; Vitoller is convinced he’ll never see his son again now that he’s heading back toward his birthplace, that destiny has a plan in all this. But Hwel knows that’s not how destiny really works, even if he deals in it often enough as a playwright. It’s fun in a technical sense because Pratchett is also playing with story convention by setting us up this way, bringing destiny and birthrights into a story that’s ultimately about making your own path. In the sections where he makes his speeches, the narrative is simultaneously showing us that Tomjon has the makings of a king and the makings of a superb actor, but we’re meant to believe that only one of these things is relevant. That simply isn’t the case. Both of those things can be true at once – we’re none of us made to be only one thing in our lives..."

[Note: Asher-Perrin will be back in the new year with the final part of Wyrd Sisters. -- Ed.]

https://bit.ly/3mz3uYL

4.3 THEY CHOSE THE RIGHT NAME... OOOK!

Roundworld has a Librarian called Librarian!

"He’s called Pustakawan, or Kawi, if you wish. Prague’s zoo said on Wednesday it has finally completed the process of naming a critically endangered Sumatran orangutan baby born on its premises on Nov 17. It took a while, because the zookeepers had to go through more than 4,000 proposals submitted by members of the public. Kawi is the fourth baby for his mother, Mawar, and the first for father Pagy. His name means Librarian in Indonesian, zoo officials said. Librarian was the name of an orangutan in Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series of fantasy novels...."

https://bit.ly/37GT7xu

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

05) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

* A HOGSWATCH MESSAGE FROM THE UNSEEN THEATRE

"Dear Patrons, Cast and Crew,

"Only 5 days to Hogswatch! We have missed being able to perform for you this year due to this embuggerance of a VIRUS! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. But we hope that you all have a very Happy Hogswatch, making the very best of whatever restrictions apply to your place of residence on the Discworld! We look forward to seeing you around about May in the Year of the Condescending Carp!"

Keep an eye on https://unseen.com.au/ for updates in the new year!

* REVIEW: MONSTROUS REGIMENT IN PERTH, FOURECKS

By Kimberley Shaw in Stage Whispers:

"Terry Pratchett shows are very popular and almost their own genre in their style. There is a dedicated fan-base, but they can often be tricky for people who are not fans of the Discworld novels to understand. Not so Monstrous Regiment, a stand-alone story that is easy to watch, entertaining and fun... The role of Polly is a big one – possibly the Pratchett Hamlet, and we are in great hands with Michelle Ezzy, giving an excellent performance as this plucky young woman trying to hide her femininity. There’s very little down time in this show, and Michelle’s anchoring, energetic performance keeps this show rollicking along. Her fellow recruits include Jess Lally, so glamorous in her last Pratchett appearance, delightful in the very unglamorous role of Igor (the makeup – one of many excellent makeup jobs is managed by Yvette Drager- Wetherilt). Candice Preston has wonderful poise, excellent characterisation and looks superb as vampire Maladict. Elizabeth Croft is scary-tough but loveable as Tonker, with Josie Walsh solid as Tonker’s very close friend Lofty. Elise Kelly gives nuance to the chef who can’t swear, Shufti, while Niamh O’Hehir charms as youngest recruit Wazzer – who is extremely devout. The final member of the regiment is Carborundum – played by the most impressive puppet I have ever seen on a Perth stage. Gorgeously constructed by Garry Wetherilt, with gorgeous eyes by Connie Wetherilt, full body puppet Carborundum has the most exquisite expressions, and gives an outstanding verbal and non-verbal performance throughout. Kudos to puppeteer/actor Zac Skelton and his teamwork with designer Gary and director Brad Towton..."

https://bit.ly/34AlyeL (includes a number of cast photos)

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

06) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS

Remember, one day, possibly in the not too distant future, Discworld fans will be able to meet in the real Roundworld again. So keep this information handy! Also note there are a few updates below.

The Broken Drummers, "London's Premier Unofficially Official Discworld Group"
BrokenDrummers@gmail.com or nicholls.helen@yahoo.co.uk or join their Facebook group at https://bit.ly/3jtYLGo

NOTE: the Drummers are still meeting occasionally via Zoom. Check out the above links for updates!

*

Drumknott's Irregulars
Facebook https://bit.ly/31FlSrq or Google Groups https:groups.google.com/forum/#!forum/drumknotts-irregulars or join us at our next event."

*

The Victorian Discworld Klatch
https://www.facebook.com/groups/VictorianDiscworldKlatch

*

"The Gathering of the Loonies (Wincanton chapter)
https://www.facebook.com/groups/373578522834654/

*

The Pratchett Partisans
https://www.facebook.com/groups/pratchettpartisans/ or contact Ula directly at uwilmott@yahoo.com.au

*

The City of Small Gods
www.cityofsmallgods.org.au

"What are we doing while we're stuck at home due to COVID-19? Given that our normal social gatherings can't happen while everyone's under lockdown due to the COVID-19 pandemic, we are instead trying to host regular activities and discussions online. Most of these will be done via our Discord Server – https://discord.gg/3RVzsyJ – which has several text chat channels and a few voice chat channels as well. We will still use our Facebook group – https://facebook.com/groups/cityofsmallgods – to coordinate scheduled events. When things get back to normal... (semi-) regular social meetings are generally held on the last Thursday of the month at a pub or restaurant in Adelaide. We have dinner at 6.30pm followed by games until 9pm. We'll try to keep this page up to date (no promises!) but always check emails on the mailing list or our Facebook Group for further details of these events."

*

The Broken Vectis Drummers
broken_vectis_drummers@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Wincanton Omnian Temperance Society (WOTS) meets at Wincanton's famous Bear Inn when social gatherings are possible.

*

The Northern Institute of the Ankh-Morpork and District Society of Flatalists normally meet at The Narrowboat Pub in Victoria Street, Skipton, North Yorkshire, Details of future meetings are posted on the Events section of the Discworld Stamps forum: http://www.discworldstamps.co.uk/forum/

*

Sydney Drummers (formerly Drummers Downunder)
Contact Sue (aka Granny Weatherwax): kenworthys@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Treacle Mining Corporation, formerly known as Perth Drummers https://bit.ly/2EKSCqu – or message Alexandra Ware directly at <alexandra.ware@gmail.com>

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

07) AROUND THE BLOGOSPHERE

Blogger Indulgent Reader's review of Hogfather:

"Susan is one of my favourite characters in the Discworld series. Despite her unique situation she tries to get on with whatever she needs to do. She doesn’t like nonsense and is fairly intelligent which is always nice as there can be a lack of intelligent females in some literature. She clearly likes the children she works with and i like that she treats them like adults. This is something that children appreciate they can tell when they are being spoken down to, and some flourish when they are treated as an adult. Obviously she has a number of quirks and these just highlight how positive all the others are... I love the way that this is written, if you have ever read a Terry Pratchett book you know that they aren’t written in chapters, and you are given a number of different strands to follow all of which are usually happening simultaneously. I love the way that this book takes elements from Christmas and brings forth the same feeling of Christmas while still highlighting the irony of certain elements of the holiday and focusing on some of the niceties that you hear about at Christmas. This book always makes me feel Christmasy..."

https://bit.ly/2KJYenJ

...and blogger and Orkneyite Nephriteon's, of the telly adaptation:

"This adaptation is very enjoyable if you are already a fan of Pratchett’s work. It’s clear right from the beginning that they spent a decent amount of money on this as the use of CGI – especially for what is basically a pair of 2006 TV movies – is surprisingly impressive. The blue lights in DEATH’S eyes and the empty void of nothingness inside the Auditors whenever they appear in their cloaked form are examples. With also a pleasant amount of practical work as well. Another sign of their dedication to detail is the fact that there were a series of small vignettes and a behind the scenes documentary made about the making of the adaptation that aired during the run up to the broadcast of the first episode which is included in the two disc version of the DVD release. The adaptation was written between Pratchett himself and Vadim Jean who also acted as director on the project. The writing in general terms is extremely accurate to the original novel with certain scenes being word for word recreations from the book. There are some differences however such as the very minor role given to the Death Of Rats and Quoth the Raven – companions of Susan – compared to the original being noticeable. Certain minor characters are removed entirely whilst the deaths of some characters are altered to fit the live action nature of the adaptation. The cast is frankly stunning – especially for long time Discworld fans..."

https://bit.ly/2KQh38E

Blogger ZeeZee loved Witches Abroad:

"I enjoyed this story SO much! Just thinking about it brings a smile to face, so I’ve bumped it onto my Favorites list because (oh man!) this story left me with such a wonderful feeling. It was a good read... This was a fun read from start to finish. I love stories that play with fairytales, and this one certainly does that. It touches on the Cinderella, Little Red Riding Hood, and the Frog Prince fairytales, and it was hilarious to see how the Ramtop witches interrupted them or stopped them from happening... I like Granny Weatherwax, but sometimes she can be unnecessarily mean, I think, to Magrat – although I do think she helps Magrat to grow a strong backbone. My favorite of the witches, of course, is my girl Nanny Ogg. Oh man! Nanny Ogg cracks me up. She’s considered the linguist among the three witches during their travel abroad, although she mispronounces many words and gets a lot of stuff wrong, lol. But Nanny Ogg is just a lot of fun and I love how she pokes at Granny sometimes to get under her skin..."

https://bit.ly/34zdFGw

Blogger Muse With Me returns with a review of Maskerade:

"This book managed to feel like both a standalone and a part of a series, which was great. Agnes Nitt first appeared in the previous Witches book, Lords and Ladies, and her frustrations with the Lancre witches carry on into this one. Granny and Nanny, for their part, are feeling the absence of Magrat from their little trio, and both in their own way feel Agnes should fill her role. A coven really ought to have three, after all: the maiden, the mother, and the crone. Together they serve as an ensemble cast, with Agnes giving us a closer look at the behind-the-scenes of the Opera House, while Granny and Nanny try to infiltrate it, to apprehend the Ghost and unmask him. Nanny Ogg sometimes feels like a bit of a sidekick in these novels, so I was really pleased that she had a more active role in this story. It’s not that she’s usually passive, just that Granny Weatherwax has such a strong, self-assured personality that she comes off as more in charge. I got a greater sense of Nanny using her own unique talents in situations Granny would be less equipped to deal with. The two have always been strong characters in these books, but I love to see Pratchett continue to build them out and make them even more vivid... For a while I was wary of the way the text was treating Agnes, on account of her weight... early on it poked fun at that a lot. This would’ve gotten old fast, but they diminished quickly enough. Though humorously presented, it was much more about how the world sees her than anything else. Despite the continued gag commentary that she has a 'lovely personality' to deflect from the matter of her weight, her character was in fact very endearing and easy to sympathize with. She’s often the most sensible person among the Opera group and deserves more recognition her talents than she gets..."

https://bit.ly/2LZY7VN

...and blogger Wyrmbergmalcolm praises The Shepherd's Crown:

"Once again, Terry Pratchett perfectly captured the idiosyncrasies of the ways of being human with some hilarious mannerisms and statements. This story also had a great cast from most of the witching world, including those from the main Discworld series. This was the one issue I had with this book. I have been reading the Tiffany Aching series to my children, who have not read any of the other books in the Discworld series. The Tiffany Aching books are written for younger readers. By including characters and other events from the main series I felt my children missed out on a lot..."

https://bit.ly/3h8z6TP

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

Here comes the Year of the Beleaguered Badger!
https://bit.ly/3nAMm5V

Our favourite Blackboard Monitor at Trinity College Dublin, December 2008:
https://twitter.com/terryandrob/status/1337548301814681604

Good Omens director Douglas Mackinnon's Hugo award for Best Dramatic Presentation, Long Form:
https://twitter.com/drmuig/status/1341035775513735170/photo/1

Marc Simonetti's fascinating vision of Maskerade:
https://bit.ly/3rmfkc0

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

09) CLOSE

Hands up who remembers all those Pratchett book signings! Here be a piece in the Bournemouth Echo about one at the turn of the century, complete with assorted iconographs. Sir Pterry – and Borders – may be gone, but the memories remain:

"The predicted chaos occurred at Borders bookshop when the hugely popular fantasy author magicked himself into town for a marathon book signing session. Fans clutching copies of his latest Discworld hardback The Truth, and the newly-released paperback The Fifth Elephant, braved two-hour queues to meet their favourite author and get his name in their new volumes. The date was November 9, 2000, as devoted fans shivered by the Bournemouth square store’s automatic doors which were kept open as the queue extended outdoors and leaned on the lower-floor escalator which had to be stopped because of the congestion."

https://bit.ly/38uhMVt

Now go hang up those stockings. Mind how you go, and we hope to see you in the new year!

– Annie Mac

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The End. If you have any questions or requests, write: wossname-owner (at) pearwood (dot) info

Copyright (c) 2020 by Wossname for the Klatchian Foreign Legion

Aaaaand... it's official! Make a note in your Discworld calendars!

Note: this is a screenshot (duh). For the original tweet, see: https://twitter.com/terryandrob/status/1333745968748048386

Wossname
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
Hogswatch Greetings Issue
December 2019 (Volume 22, Issue 12, Post 1)

********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a free publication offering news, reviews, and all the other stuff-that-fits pertaining to the works of Sir Terry Pratchett. Originally founded by the late, great Joe Schaumburger for members of the worldwide Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North American Discworld Society and other continental groups, Wossname is now for Discworld and Pratchett fans everywhere in Roundworld.
********************************************************************

Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
News Editor: Vera P
Newshounds: Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow, Mss C, Alison not Aliss
Staff Writers: Asti, Pitt the Elder, Evil Steven Dread, Mrs Wynn-Jones
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Annie Mac, Drusilla D'Afanguin, Your Name Here
Puzzle Editor: Tiff (still out there somewhere)
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
Emergency Staff: Steven D'Aprano, Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare time)

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR

Greetings, O Readers!

We've shut up shop for the holidays at the Fortress of Wossname, so all I have for you is a couple of newsbits. The first is that next year will be known in Discworld fan-land as the Year of the Condescending Carp. The second is that Bernard Pearson aka the Cunning Artificer has made some of his famous "tales of my friend Terry" available to listen to for free:

"Hark, the herald’s podcast’s here! Episode 1 of ‘And He Said To Me’ is a Hogswatch treat for your ears from our founder, Bernard Pearson, telling festive stories of The Creator with Rob Wilkins of

terryandrob, available NOW! HAPPY HOGSWATCH ONE AND ALL!"

https://twitter.com/Discworldshoppe/status/1208679365002829824

"Although Terry left the party early, in March 2015 the echoes of the conversations we had, the jokes we shared and the drinks I brought, still rattle around in my head... Stories about great men sometimes miss out the human being underneath. Terry was a world-famous author and a genius. He also possessed a wonderful sense of humour. Sometimes delivered in the same way you wrap an iron bar in a sock. In his case, thankfully, it was often a rod of irony rather than heavy metal..."

https://andhesaidtome.buzzsprout.com/

The third is that the first Discworld play of the year arrives in mid-January:

* WYRD SISTERS IN READING (JANUARY 2020)

Reading's Progress Theatre, a wonderfully ambitious company whose wide-ranging productions have already included Mort (1997), The Fifth Elephant (2013), and Maskerade (2018), will be staging Wyrd Sisters in January! Melanie Sherwood and Liz Carroll return as Granny and Nanny, and they look perfect in their roles, as does Yvonne Newton as Magrat.

"The ever-popular (Sir) Terry Pratchett OBE makes a welcome return to the stage at Progress Theatre, in another wonderful adaptation by Stephen Briggs. If you like your comic fantasy turned up to the maximum you will be delighted with this show. The many people who loved our production of Maskerade will be delighted to see the return of those memorable characters, Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg, in this tale of witches and royalty, loosely based on Macbeth. Very loosely... People have travelled from far afield to see our previous productions of Pratchett's Discworld works, so book early to avoid disappointment."

When: 16th-25th January 2020
Venue: Progress Theatre, The Mount, Reading RG1 5HL
Time: all evening shows 7.45pm, Saturday matinees 2.30pm
Tickets: £12 (concessions £10), available via https://www.ticketsource.co.uk/progresstheatre/e-yopdab

http://progresstheatre.co.uk/2020-wyrd-sisters

...and last but far from least, a glimpse into L-space that you can even create for yourself!

"You might have seen the words book nook popping up on social media in recent days, along with images of crafted alleyways, and structures acting as dividers on bookcases. The concept became popular on Reddit, with the r/booknooks subreddit going from zero to 7,900 members in just two days. The website defines book nooks as 'mini worlds created within your bookshelf', usually as a diorama of an alley... There are plenty of ways of making 'book nooks', but one that features most often is the aid of 3D printing. 'The hardest part was to make a 3D model suitable for printing,' said 38-year-old Konstantin Borisov, a programmer in Omsk, Russia. 'I modelled the objects and composed them in a complete scene...' He explained that his motivation to create the "book nook" came down to a feeling which may be shared by many book lovers... 'I wanted to have a door to the magic world like the hidden entrance behind the Leaky Cauldron in Harry Potter, but in the middle of my books. When I was thinking about this, I was thinking about the world of Terry Pratchett's books, medieval, full of magic and humour...'"

https://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-trending-50840434

The photo of that Ankh-Morpork alleyway: https://bit.ly/2QfXh5M

And that's it for 2019. Mind how you go, and we'll see you next year!

– Annie Mac, Editor

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The End. If you have any questions or requests, write: wossname-owner (at) pearwood (dot) info

Copyright (c) 2019 by Wossname for the Klatchian Foreign Legion

Wossname
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
December 2017 (Volume 20, Issue 12, Post 1)

********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a free publication offering news, reviews, and all the other stuff-that-fits pertaining to the works of Sir Terry Pratchett. Originally founded by the late, great Joe Schaumburger for members of the worldwide Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North American Discworld Society and other continental groups, Wossname is now for Discworld and Pratchett fans everywhere in Roundworld.
********************************************************************

Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
News Editor: Vera P
Newshounds: Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow, Mss C, Alison not Aliss
Staff Writers: Asti, Pitt the Elder, Evil Steven Dread, Mrs Wynn-Jones
Staff Technomancers: Jason Parlevliet, Archchancellor Neil, DJ Helpful
Book Reviews: Annie Mac, Drusilla D'Afanguin, Your Name Here
Puzzle Editor: Tiff (still out there somewhere)
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
Emergency Staff: Steven D'Aprano, Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare time)

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

INDEX:

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH
02 EDITOR'S LETTER
03) ODDS AND SODS
04) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
05) DISCWORLD ARTS AND CRAFTS NEWS
06) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS
07) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
08) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH

“I read Good Omens almost 20 years ago. I thought it was one of the funniest, coolest books I’d ever read. It was also, obviously, unfilmable. Two months ago Neil sent me the scripts, and I knew I had to be in it.”
– Jon Hamm, aka the Angel Gabriel

“It’s not every day you get to play the Voice of God."
– Sir Derek Jacobi, who has already had the experience of playing small(er) gods (the Emperor Claudius and The Master from Gallifrey, among many others)

"Although we have visitors from all over the world, people don't usually come to Salisbury just to see an exhibition from Australia, New Zealand, America, Russia, Northumberland, Aberdeen... so people have travelled such a long way just to see some of the things that meant the most to Terry."
– Richard Henry, Salisbury Museum curator

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR

Here it is, the last day of 2017 (or the Year of Some Artichoke or Other***), and if you're reading these words right now, it means that something wonderful has happened to all of us: WE ATE'NT DEAD. So pour yourself a double thimbleful of last Tuesday's best vintage scumble, tuck into that pile of leftover Hogswatch pies, and join me in hoping that the last day of 2018 will find us all upright (not tuppenny), breathing (not heavily) and reading those same three words. And also continuing to re-read and cherish and spread the word about one of the finest authors ever to put pen to paper, fingertips to keypad or voice to Dragon. Hail and never farewell, Sir Terry Pratchett! May your name stay forever on the Overhead.

Now then...

– Annie Mac, Editor

*** Of course I know what Discworld year this supposedly has been. I also know that the coming year is purported to be the Year of Some Prawn or Other. But until someone provides verifiable proof that The Author himself left us a list of future Discworld year-names, I can't but look a wee bit askance at 'em. Pass the crystal ball, Mrs Cake...

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) ODDS AND SODS

A reminder: the Terry Pratchett: HisWorld exhibition at the Salisbury Museum has been extended and will now run until 14th January 2018. The admission charges to the museum, including the exhibit, are £7.50 adult and £3.60 for children aged 5 to 16. There is an £18.50 family ticket (2 adults and up to four children). Children under 5 get free entry. There is also a donations scheme: "Donation admissions can be tax effective if given under Gift Aid. They are 10% greater than the standard entry fee to enable Salisbury Museum to treat the whole amount paid as a donation and reclaim tax on the total. This amounts to an extra 25 per cent, potentially a very significant boost to museum funds."

Tickets can be bookedonline at http://salisbury.merlintickets.co.uk/product/ADMW000004

http://www.salisburymuseum.org.uk/whats-on/exhibitions/terry-pratchett-hisworld

Paul Kidby's The Charmed Realm exhibition at the Salisbury Museum has also been extended, and will also run until the 14th of January. Note: the exhibition is in the Small Exhibition Gallery on the First Floor (access by stairs only). The exhibition itself is free entry, but normal admission charges to the museum apply.

http://www.salisburymuseum.org.uk/whats-on/exhibitions/paul-kidby-charmed-realm

*

BBC Radio Four is repeating the rather excellent Good Omens radio play. The six episodes started on Christmas Day, are currently running, and will all be available for listening until late January. Go here to listen:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b04knt4h/episodes/guide

*

On Gizmodo, James Whitbrook writes of a small but fitting tribute that will be seen in the forthcoming live-action Good Omens miniseries:

"The more and more we see of Good Omens, the sadder it is that Neil Gaiman's collaborator on the original novel, the departed Terry Pratchett, isn't here to see his work come to life. But the BBC series, in some subtle ways, is planning at least one lovely tribute to the author. Gaiman took to Instagram last night to share a small video from filming within the set of Aziraphale's bookshop, a key location from the novel that operates as both Aziraphale's (played by Michael Sheen in the Amazon/BBC series) home away from Heaven on Earth, and a repository for his beloved book collection. In the show at least, it will have a pile of Pratchett's most iconic books, alongside his trademark hat, described by Gaiman as something 'one of the customers left behind and will be back for one day...' It's a small, but heartwarming tribute to Pratchett – and likely not the only loving reference the show will make to its source material's sadly absent co-creator."

http://bit.ly/2ylgach (page includes short video)

*

Maurice hits the millions mark: in the Auckland, New Zealand library system, TAMAHER was the four millionth ebook checked out:

"A children’s tale of clever rats and their pied piper has led Auckland Libraries across the line to reach a total of 4 million checkouts from their main eBooks platform, OverDrive. The milestone was reached this month with the checkout of Amazing Maurice and his educated rodents by author Terry Pratchett. Auckland Libraries is now one of only eight libraries in the world to hit 4 million checkouts from OverDrive, the leading digital reading platform used by a network of 36,000 libraries and schools in 63 countries worldwide..."

http://bit.ly/2pYzflY

*

Pratchat is a monthly podcast that examines the novels of Sir Terry Pratchett. The podcast is hosted by one Ben McKenzie – presumably not the actor – and Elizabeth Flux, and they plan to read and and discuss one Pratchett novel every month:

"Our next episode is still a couple of weeks away, but we'd like to wish all of our listeners a very Happy Hogswatch! We hope you're having a lovely holiday, whatever form it takes. We couldn't bring you all pies, of course, but we did get you a little present: a streamable, downloadable version of the full Pratchat theme song by David Ashton! It's one of our favourite things about the show, and we hope you'll enjoy listening to it as much as we do. We've made it available via the Splendid Chaps Production Bandcamp page (_https://splendidchaps.bandcamp.com/_), where you'll also find some other free stuff, including the first episode of audio comedy series Night Terrace. Have a great holiday, and we'll see you in the new year!"

http://pratchatpodcast.com/

*

Speaking of the Terry Pratchett: HisWorld exhibition, the Lego Discworld session was a success. Katy Griffin in the Salisbury Journal writes:

"The giant Lego mosaic was based on the Pied Piper artwork by Paul Kidby's artwork for Terry Pratchett's book The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents. The museum held the Lego building event on Saturday, December 9 which was attended by four hundred and sixty visitors. A spokesman for the museum said: 'We were thrilled that so many visitors turned out in the freezing cold to take part. We finally completed the Lego mosaic just before 6pm with the help of some very determined Lego builders. The complete mosaic is currently on display at the museum.' The giant Lego mosaic was made from 61,440 Lego bricks. And 130 models of the Discworld character "The Luggage" were also constructed."

http://www.salisburyjournal.co.uk/news/15714120.Giant_Lego_mosaic_created_to_celebrate_Sir_Terry_Pratchett/

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04) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

4.1 PLAYS IN JANUARY AND FEBRUARY 2018

* MORT IN STAFFORDSHIRE (JANUARY 2018)

The Tower Players return in January with a new Discworld production! Director Andy Moseley writes:

"Having had only a brief cameo in 2012's Wyrd Sisters, Tower Players are putting everyone's favourite anthropomorphic personification front and centre in their new production of Mort. This is Tower Players' second outing to the second hand set of dimensions that is home to Discworld, following their highly commended staging of Wyrd Sisters in 2012. Stephen Briggs' adaptation brings to life this humorous tale that tackles classic themes of unrequited young love, the nature of mortality and the impulsive, hormone driven disruption of the entire history of the future.

"Book your tickets now for a great night in the company of Princesses, Wizards, hormonal teenagers and the most efficient short order cook ever to grace the kitchen of Harga's House of Ribs! Tell your families. Tell your friends. Tell your enemies. Tell your colleagues. Tell the person sat next to you on the tube/train/bus. Tell your taxi driver. Tell random strangers in the street. Tell everyone!!"

When: 11th-13th January 2018
Venue: Prince of Wales Centre, Church Street, Cannock, Staffs WS11 1DE
Time: TBA
Tickets: £12, available from the Box Office (01543 578 762) or online at https://boxoffice.wlct.org/event_description.aspx?eventid=655

If you have further enquiries, contact towerplayers@live.com

* MASKERADE IN READING (JANUARY 2018)

The Progress Theatre will be staging their production of Maskerade in January next year.

When: 18th–27th January 2018
Venue: Progress Theatre, The Mount, Reading RG1 5HL
Time: 7.45pm all evening shows, 2.30pm matinees on 20th and 27th January
Tickets: TBA

http://progresstheatre.co.uk/maskerade

* MEN AT ARMS IN BERKSHIRE *RESCHEDULED* (FEBRUARY 2018)

The Cranbourne Amateur Dramatic Society (CADS) have rescheduled their production of Men at Arms to February 2018:

"The Ankh-Morpork City Night Watch find their services are once more needed to tackle a threat to their city. A threat at least as deadly as a 60-foot dragon, but mechanical and heartless to boot. It kills without compunction. It is the first gun on the Discworld. The original Watch – Captain Vimes, Sergeant Colon, Corporal Carrot and Corporal Nobbs – are joined by some new recruits, selected to reflect the city's ethnic make-up – Lance-constables Cuddy, Detritus, and Angua. In a city, where Assassins are clowning about and Fools are dying, the Watch must keep control of themselves as much as its citizens."

When: 15th, 16th and 17th February 2018
Venue: St Peter's Church Hall, Hatchet Lane, Cranbourne, Winkfield, Berks SL4 2EG
Time: 7.45pm all evening shows, with a 2.30pm matinee on the 17th
Tickets: £9, available from the Box Office (phone 01344 886456) or by printing and posting a facsimile of the Booking Form below.

A rather adorable promotional video can be seen here (just remember to ignore the October performance dates at the end):
https://youtu.be/Dx_ndpHGevw

www.cadsact.org.uk/shows/

* MONSTROUS REGIMENT IN GEORGIA USA (FEBRUARY 2018)

Gainesville Theatre Alliance's 2017-2018 season will feature their production of Monstrous Regiment in a "February Festival of Theatre". "GTA is a nationally acclaimed collaboration of the University of North Georgia, Brenau University, theatre professionals and the northeast Georgia community that has yielded state and national awards."

When: 16th–24th February 2018
Venue: UNG-Gainesville's Ed Cabell Theatre, 3820 Mundy Mill Road, Oakwood, GA
Time: 7:30pm evening shows on the 16th, 18th, 20th-24th, and 2:30pm matinees on the 17th & 24th
Tickets: $18-20 for adults, $16-18 for seniors and $12-14 for students, depending on seat location, available from www.gainesvilleTHEATREalliance.org or by phoning the Box Office at 678 717 3624. NOTE: by early August, 97 percent of the GTA performances were sold out. "Theater-goers may purchase tickets to one show or all five. They also may build their own custom ticket package, earning discounts for two shows or more."

http://blog.ung.edu/gta/performances/index/
http://blog.ung.edu/gta/performances/tickets/

* MASKERADE IN YORK (FEBRUARY 2018)

We Are Theatre's next Discworld play will be the Stephen Briggs adaptation of Maskerade!

When: 26th–28th Feb 2018
Venue: The Black Swan, Peasholme Green, York, YO1 7PR
Time: 7.30pm all shows
Tickets: £10, bookable by phoning 07521 364107 (note that there is only limited seating available)

http://www.wearetheatre.co.uk/upcoming-productions.html

4.2 PLAYS LATER IN 2018

* WYRD SISTERS IN IFIELD, WEST SUSSEX (MARCH 2018)

The Ifield Barn Theatre Society are gearing up for their production of Wyrd Sisters in March.

When: 7th–10th March 2018
Venue: Ifield Barn Theatre, Ifield Street, Crawley, W Sussex RH110NN
Time: 8pm all evening shows, plus a 3pm matinee on 10th March
Tickets: £10 (£8 for members and children), available from http://www.ticketsource.co.uk/ifieldbarntheatre

http://www.ifieldbarn.co.uk/coming-soon.html

* WYRD SISTERS IN BENDIGO, FOURECKS (APRIL 2018)

The Bendigo Theatre Company's Tribe Youth Theatre will stage a production of Wyrd Sisters in April!

When: 5th–8th April 2018
Venue: BTC Arts Shed, 15-17 Allingham Street, Golden Square, Bendigo, Victoria 3555
Time: 7pm all shows
Tickets: $22 (concessions $20; students $17; children under 12 $14; family ticket $57), available via http://bit.ly/2Clm4jH – choose your date from the drop-down menu.

About Tribe: https://bendigotheatrecompany.org/tribe/

https://bendigotheatrecompany.org/

* GUARDS! GUARDS! IN CHORLEY (APRIL 2018)

CADOS (possibly once the Chorley and District Operatic Society?) will be staging Guards! Guards! in April: "This production marks what would have been Sir Terry's 70th birthday."

When: 23rd–28th April 2018
Venue: Chorley Little Theatre, Dole Lane, Chorley, Lancs PR7 2RL
Time: 7:30pm all shows
Tickets: 23rd, 24th, 25th £8; 26th, 27th, 28th £10, available online at https://www.ticketsource.co.uk/event/208113 or in person at Malcom's Musicland 01257 264362 or Ebb & Flo Bookshop or when the Theatre Box Office is open for shows.

http://www.chorleylittletheatre.com/chorleytheatre/index.php/event/552-cados-play

Editor's note: the theatre itself is absolutely adorable! Look:
http://www.chorleylittletheatre.com/chorleytheatre/images/ChorleyLittleTheatre1.jpg

* MORT IN BIRKENHEAD (APRIL 2018)

The Carlton Players will be staging Mort next April: "He gets board and lodging and free use of company horse, and doesn't even need time off for his grandmother's funeral..."

When: 24th–28th April 2018
Venue: The Little Theatre, Grange Rd West, Birkenhead CH41 4BY
Time: 7.30pm all shows
Tickets: £8 (students and under-16s £6), available from https://www.ticketsource.co.uk/venue/FEDIFI or by ringing the box office on 0151 647 6593

https://www.carltonlittletheatre.co.uk/the-carlton-players/2017-18-season/mort/

* GUARDS! GUARDS! IN PLYMOUTH (MAY 2018)

City College Plymouth will be staging their production of Guards! Guards! in May 2018.

When: 16th–18th May 2018
Venue: Tilt Theatre, Performing Arts, City College Plymouth, Plymouth
Time: 7.30pm all shows
Tickets: TBA

https://allevents.in/plymouth/guards-guards-by-terry-pratchett/1943260799295027

* MEN AT ARMS IN BRISBANE, FOURECKS (OCTOBER/NOVEMBER 2018)

It will be a bit of a wait, but the Brisbane Arts Centre's next Discworld production – Men at Arms – is already looking good! All props to Fourecks for keeping the Disc alive on stage: "Men at Arms is the 15th novel in Sir Terry Pratchett's Discworld series, a comic fantasy universe with over 80 million books sold worldwide. Aficionados and newcomers to the Disc will love this adaptation, brought to life by the expertise of our Pratchett team."

When: 6th October through 3rd November 2018
Venue: Brisbane Arts Centre, 210 Petrie Terrace, Petrie Terrace (yes, the suburb and the road share a name), Brisbane, Queensland 4000
Time: 7.30pm Thursdays, 8.00pm Fridays and Saturdays, 6.30pm Sundays. "Doors close 5 minutes prior to performance. Late entry is not permitted."
Tickets: AU$34 ($28 concession or groups of 10 or more), available now online at http://bit.ly/2zHKO5a – and there will be Student Rush tickets priced at $15, available from the box office 15 minutes prior to curtain on the dates

https://www.artstheatre.com.au/menatarms

* GOING POSTAL IN BRISTOL (DECEMBER 2018)

The Kelvin Players will be staging Going Postal in December 2018. Keep an eye on their website: "Moist von Lipwig was a con artist, a fraud and a man faced with a life choice: be hanged, or put Ankh-Morpork's ailing postal service back on its feet. It was a tough decision. With the help of a golem who has been at the bottom of hole in the ground for over two hundred years, a pin fanatic and Junior Postman Groat, he's got to see that the mail gets through. In taking on the evil chairman of the Grand Trunk Semaphore Company, and a midnight killer, he's also got to stay alive. Getting a date with Adora Bell Dearheart would be nice, too. In the mad world of the mail, can a criminal succeed where honest men have failed and died? Perhaps there's a shot at redemption for man who's prepared to push the envelope..."

When: 5th–8th and 12th–15th December 2018
Venue: Kelvin Studios, 253B Gloucester Road, Bishopston, Bristol BS7 8NY
Time: 7.30pm all shows
Tickets: TBA

http://www.kelvinplayers.co.uk/coming-soon

4.3 REVIEWS

* LORDS AND LADIES IN NORWICH

By Viv Thomas in the Norwich Evening News:

"A group of talented youngsters have been casting a spell over sell-out audiences at Stage Two in the past few days with a lively adaptation of Terry Pratchett’s Lords and Ladies. What's not to like – good witches, evil elves, royalty, rustics, morris dancing, sword fights – all presented with lots of humour! A Midsummer Night's Dream is referenced various times – but this story, adapted for the stage by Irana Brown, takes some of those themes and mischievously takes them in a different direction. There were great performances all round as the cast (some portraying several characters) really got their teeth into comedic parts, with the leads particularly assured and impressive. Mention must also be made of the clever and extremely effective set, sound and lighting effects..."

http://bit.ly/2l7ZeCD

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05) DISCWORLD ARTS AND CRAFTS NEWS

"The Josh Kirby estate is excited to bring you a Limited Edition sculpture of the long, lost Josh Kirby Greebo! We have partnered with the incredible sculptor, Lyn Marie Neuenfeldt (of DobbyLyn Art Works), to bring this Discworld treasure to you! The sculpture is based on this image that was found in Josh's vast archives after he passed, so it was never seen before, until we discovered it. Here's your exclusive, sneak peek at the progress. Greebo has his eye on you! The pre-sale starts next week and it's sure to sell out, so please keep an eye open for the launch date to ensure you get a low number. Cheers!"

Note: there appears to be no findable link on any platform for pre-ordering yet. Stay tuned... – Ed.

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06) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS

The Broken Drummers, "London's Premier Unofficially Official Discworld Group" (motto "Nil percussio est"), will be meeting next from 7pm on Monday 8th January 2018 at the Monkey Puzzle, 30 Southwick Street, London, W2 1JQ, a week later than usual due – presumably – to the likelihood of New Year's Eve hangovers casting a pall over the first Monday of the year... "We welcome anyone and everyone who enjoys Sir Terry's works, or quite likes them or wants to find out more. We have had many visitors from overseas who have enjoyed themselves and made new friends. The discussions do not only concern the works of Sir Terry Pratchett but wander and meander through other genres and authors and also leaping to TV and Film production. We also find time for a quiz."

The Drummers have also taken up doing the odd afternoon meetup. For more information, go to http://brokendrummers.org/ or email BrokenDrummers@gmail.com or nicholls.helen@yahoo.co.uk

*

Canberra, Australia's Discworld fan group is Drumknott's Irregulars: "The group is open to all, people from interstate and overseas are welcome, and our events will not be heavily themed. Come along to dinner for a chat and good company. We welcome people from all fandoms (and none) and we would love to see you at one of our events, even if you're just passing through. Please contact us via Facebook (_https://www.facebook.com/groups/824987924250161/_) or Google Groups (_https://groups.google.com/forum/#!forum/drumknotts-irregulars_) or join us at our next event."

*

For Facebook users in Fourecks: The Victorian Discworld Klatch is "a social group for fans of Discworld and Terry Pratchett... run by a dedicated team who meet monthly and organise events monthly." "If you'd like to join our events please ask to join the Klatch."

The Victorian Discworld Klatch will be holding a Hogswatch gathering in January!

When: Sunday 7th January 2018
Venue: Marquee, Flagstaff near the Bowls Club, 9/311 William St, Melbourne 3003
Time: 5.30 (ish) until...?

BYO everything. All Pratchett fans and potential Pratchett fans probably welcome...

https://www.facebook.com/groups/VictorianDiscworldKlatch

*

"The Gathering of the Loonies (Wincanton chapter)" is a public Facebook meeting group: "This group, by request of Jo in Bear will continue to be used for future unofficial (not run by the Emporium) fan Gatherings in Wincanton. Look here for information." Future events will include the Did You Bring a Beer Along meeting (celebrating 20 years of The Last Continent) in April 2018.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/373578522834654/

*

The Pratchett Partisans are a fan group who meet monthly at either Brisbane or Indooroopilly to "eat, drink and chat about all things Pratchett. We hold events such as Discworld dinners, games afternoons, Discworld photo scavenger hunts. We also attend opening night at Brisbane Arts Theatre's Discworld plays." The Partisans currently have about 200 members who meet at least twice a month, usually in Brisbane.

For more info about their next meetup, join up at https://www.facebook.com/groups/pratchettpartisans/ or contact Ula directly at uwilmott@yahoo.com.au

*

The City of Small Gods is a group for fans in Adelaide and South Australia: "We have an established Terry Pratchett & Discworld fan group in Adelaide called The City of Small Gods, which is open to anyone who would like to come – you don't have to live in Adelaide or even South Australia, or even be a Discworld fan, but that's mostly where our events will be held, and we do like discussing Pratchett's works. Our (semi-) regular meetings are generally held on the last Thursday of the month at a pub or restaurant in Adelaide. We have dinner at 6.30pm followed by games until 9pm. The games are usually shorter games like Pairs, Sushi Go, or Tiny Epic Defenders, with the occasional Werewolf session, as these are the best sort of games that work in a pub setting. Every few months, we have a full day's worth of board games at La Scala Cafe, 169 Unley Rd, Unley in the function room starting at 10am. In addition, we will occasionally have other events to go and see plays by Unseen Theatre Company, book discussions, craft, chain maille or costuming workshops or other fun social activities."

The next CoSG events will be a New Year's Day Movie outing (details TBC, it says), and then the next Board Games Day at La Scala Cafe Unley on 21st January.

The CoSG also have another identity. Here's the skinny:

Round World Events SA Inc is a not-for-profit incorporated association whose aim is to run fun social Pratchett-themed events for people in South Australia. Our first major event was the Unseen University Convivium held in July 2012. We have also run three successful and booked out Science Fiction and Fantasy themed quiz nights named Quiz Long And Prosper, in 2013, 2014 and 2015! We are also running the next Australian Discworld Convention, Nullus Anxietas VI – The Discworld Grand Tour – taking place in August 2017. You can find more out about it on this very website (_http://ausdwcon.org/_)! The association will run some events under the City of Small Gods banner, but you do not have to be a Round World Events SA member to be part of City of Small Gods. However, we are always on the look out for new members for Round World Events SA to help us organise future events! Membership is $20 a year (for Adelaide locals) or $5 a year (for those not quite so close) and has the following benefits:

A shiny membership certificate all of your very own
Discounted entry price to some of the events we run
A warm, fuzzy feeling deep down in your chest (no, not quite that deep)
For more information, or to join as a member, please email RoundWorldEventsSA@gmail.com

www.cityofsmallgods.org.au

*

The Broken Vectis Drummers meet next on Thursday 4th January 2018 (probably) from 7.30pm at The Castle pub in Newport, Isle of Wight. For more info and any queries, contact broken_vectis_drummers@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Wincanton Omnian Temperance Society (WOTS) next meets on Friday 5th January 2018 (probably) at Wincanton's famous Bear Inn from 7pm onwards. "Visitors and drop-ins are always welcome!"

*

The Northern Institute of the Ankh-Morpork and District Society of Flatalists, a Pratchett fangroup, has been meeting on a regular basis since 2005. The Flatalists normally meet at The Narrowboat Pub in Victoria Street, Skipton, North Yorkshire, to discuss "all things Pratchett" as well as having quizzes and raffles. Details of future meetings are posted on the Events section of the Discworld Stamps forum:

http://www.discworldstamps.co.uk/forum/

*

Sydney Drummers (formerly Drummers Downunder) would normally meet next on Monday 1st January 2018 at 6.30pm in Sydney at 3 Wise Monkeys, 555 George Street, Sydney 2000 – but do check, in case of hangovers (see Broken Drummers, above). For more information, contact Sue (aka Granny Weatherwax): kenworthys@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Treacle Mining Corporation, formerly known as Perth Drummers, should meet next on Monday 1st January 2018 from 5.30pm at Carpe Cafe, 526 Murray Street, Perth, Western Australia – but do check, in case of hangovers (see Broken Drummers, above). For details follow Perth Drummers on Twitter @Perth_Drummers or join their Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/Perth.Drummers/ – or message Alexandra Ware directly at <alexandra.ware@gmail.com>

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07) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

Jon Hamm as Good Omen's Angel Gabriel: http://bit.ly/2jBJS7F

Michael McKean as Shadwell: https://www.instagram.com/p/Bcwmy6ZFL8I/

Salisbury's Spire FM has posted a photo of a very special pillarbox at the Terry Pratchett: HisWorld exhibition: https://cml.sad.ukrd.com/image/631941-500x666.jpg

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08) CLOSE

Here be an appropriate seasonal action replay to take you into the new year: Crowley and Aziraphale's New Year's resolutions, originally published in 2005, courtesy of Neil Gaiman: http://bit.ly/2AiuOpp

...and that's it for 2017. Take care, and we'll see you next month... and next year!

– Annie Mac

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The End. If you have any questions or requests, write: wossname-owner (at) pearwood (dot) info

Copyright (c) 2017 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

"Sir Baldrick" and a private viewing of the Salisbury Museum's Terry Pratchett: HisWorld exhibit – two for the price of one in this special event!

"Join us for an evening with the much-loved actor, presenter and author, Sir Tony Robinson and Rob Wilkins will be here to start the whole thing off. Known the world over as the voice of the Discworld audiobooks, Sir Tony will talk about his work with Terry Pratchett on the Discworld novels, their mutual interest in Alzheimer's, and the importance of story in both of their lives. The talk will be followed by a book signing, where Sir Tony will be signing copies of his autobiography 'No Cunning Plan'. The 'Terry Pratchett: HisWorld' exhibition will be open in the Main Exhibition Galleries after the talk for a Private View."

When: Friday, 15th December 2017
Venue: Salisbury Museum, The King’s House, 65 The Close, Salisbury SP1 2EN
Time: 18:30 to 20:30
Tickets: £25, available online at http://salisbury.merlintickets.co.uk/collections/Events

http://www.salisburymuseum.org.uk/whats-on/events/evening-sir-tony-robinson

Wossname
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
December 2016 (Volume 19, Issue 12, Post 1)

********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a free publication offering news, reviews, and all the other stuff-that-fits pertaining to the works of Sir Terry Pratchett. Originally founded by the late, great Joe Schaumburger for members of the worldwide Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North American Discworld Society and other continental groups, Wossname is now for Discworld and Pratchett fans everywhere in Roundworld.
********************************************************************

Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
News Editor: Vera P
Newshounds: Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow, Mss C, Alison not Aliss
Staff Writers: Asti, Pitt the Elder, Evil Steven Dread, Mrs Wynn-Jones
Staff Technomancers: Jason Parlevliet, Archchancellor Neil, DJ Helpful
Book Reviews: Annie Mac, Drusilla D'Afanguin, Your Name Here
Puzzle Editor: Tiff (still out there somewhere)
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
Emergency Staff: Steven D'Aprano, Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare time)

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

INDEX:

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH
02) EDITOR'S LETTER
03) ODDS AND SODS
04) DISCWORLD CONVENTION NEWS
05) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
06) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS
07) AROUND THE BLOGOSPHERE
08) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
09) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH

"The powers that be have spoken! The #Discworld year known on Roundworld as 2017 shall be named THE YEAR OF THE BACKWARDS FACING ARTICHOKE!"
– the Discworld Emporium

"What kind of man would put a known criminal in charge of a major branch of government? Apart from, say, the average voter."
– the wisdom of Moist von Lipwig

"Hogfather is the twentieth book in the Discworld Series by Terry Pratchett. We loved it for many reasons, and in particular because it means that my son has now read nearly half the series, which is an immense achievement for a ten year old boy who a few years ago announced he wasn't going to bother to learn to read."
– blogger katyboo1

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02) LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR

So much for my intention to take a first-time-ever Hogswatch break! This month's issue has made itself manifest after all. It is a bit smaller and lighter than usual, but there are still some interesting odds and sods, updates and what have you.

We had a wonderful Hogswatch holiday; I hope yours was as well. It's been a turbulent year around Roundworld, but we "risen apes" are a resilient species, so here's hoping that 2017 – or should I say the Year of the Backwards Facing Artichoke – will hold at least a modicum of hope and joy.

Right, on with the show!

– Annie Mac, Editor

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03) ODDS AND SODS

3.1 PTERRY AND THE LOCAL CHURCH

Sir Pterry's local Omnian priest (as it were) remembers him with respect at Roundworld's Hogswatch time:

"At St Martin's, the congregation was recently faced with a £96,000 bill for work to the roof and other essential works. They raised it all, with a further £25,000 put in the reserves for the future – and that with a population of just 20. The late author Terry Pratchett, who lived nearby, joined in with the fundraising despite describing himself as a Humanist rather than a Christian. He helped to organise a fair, advertising it on his Facebook page. On the day, his fans turned up dressed as wizards or as Death, characters from his novels. Mr Pratchett came to all the fundraising-committee meetings because he saw the importance of the church for the community. He used to like to sit in St Martin's, saying it was a place of 'solace to the soul'..."

http://www.countrylife.co.uk/country-life/country-life-christmas-message-bishop-ramsbury-144971

3.2 THE BAR IS OPEN. OOOK!

You may remember a Wossname feature not too long ago, about a Discworld-inspired London area micropub called The Broken Drum that was about to open. Well, open it did – and it's serving pints right now:

"In case you are not familiar of what a traditional ale house is, we: do not have a troll as our bouncer, sawdust covered floors or frequent bar brawls. In fact, despite its name, we encourage good conversation and only sell the finest real ales straight from the cask, in a relaxed and friendly atmosphere."

The Broken Drum supports the Orangutan Foundation and Alzheimer's Research UK.

http://www.thebrokendrum.co.uk/

3.3 DISCWORLD: "HIGHEST FORM OF LITERATURE"?

On the Tor blog, fantasy author Brandon Sanderson confessed in 2013:

"I'm embarrassed by how long it took me to discover Terry Pratchett. I avoided him during much of my early reading career – I'd read the works of fantastical humorists before, and while I'd always enjoyed the experience, it wasn't something I intentionally sought out. I didn't realize I was missing out on what are arguably the best books fantasy has to offer. It's hard to describe Pratchett to the uninitiated. His works mostly take place on a fictional world shaped like a disc, and the stories tend to be murder mysteries or thrillers mixed with a healthy dose of satire on the human condition. Like the best works of fantasy, a journey with his trolls, witches, and crusty night watchmen provokes inspection of our own world. But what other authors do with light allusions, Discworld does with a sledgehammer. And with light allusion too. Then it steals your wallet.

"Discworld is story, humor, and philosophy all in one. Nowhere else have I been made to laugh so much while being forced to think so much, all while being given a wonderful plot. The closest thing to Pratchett out there is Shakespeare. Yes, really. Here's the core of my argument, then. Pratchett isn't just funny, Pratchett is transcendent. There are lots of funny writers. Some are hilarious. A few are good at making you think at the same time. But most humorists, while brilliant, have trouble with story. If I put their book down, I remember the laughter, but feel no urgency to return. Those narratives don't get their hooks in me – they don't have that pull, like gravity, that a good plot builds. In short, they don't make me think – bleary-eyed at 3:00 a.m. – that I need to read one more chapter. Pratchett, on the other hand, routinely makes me lose sleep. His best stories (I suggest Going Postal or The Truth) have excellent narrative urgency, but add to it a level of riotous wit. Then, if that weren't enough, they kick you in the head with moments of poignant commentary – unexpected, brazen, and delightful... In five hundred years, it won't be the Nobel laureates who are being studied. It's going to be this guy..."

http://www.tor.com/2013/04/27/terry-pratchetts-discworld-might-be-the-highest-form-of-literature-on-the-planet/

3.4 SIR PTERRY AND THE DOCTOR

A bit of an action replay – a lovely reminiscence from the "Anglonerd" ezine about Sir Pterry in 2014 at a Barnes and Noble bookshop, musing on Doctor Who (includes video):

"Terry Pratchett and Rob Wilkins had a discussion about Terry's new book Dodger. The conversation was wonderfully derailed several times, and they got to share other Pratchett news about The Watch TV series and Nation and so on (I'll be sharing those on this blog in forthcoming posts), as well as tangents about things like Doctor Who. Below is the transcript and video of Sir Terry's opinion on the casting of the Doctor...

"Terry: I was there for the first episode of Doctor Who. The thing about Doctor Who, if you are a real Doctor Who fan, you might know that when the BBC put it out, not many people watched the first episode, but those that did were telling people about it. So, on the next Saturday, they repeated the first one so that people could see what it was all about. Just a piece of trivia, but there it is, because I was there, hiding behind the settee.

"Rob: William Hartnell was no David Tennant, though, I'm sorry.

"Terry: No, but David Tennant is a definite David Tennant. He is the best Doctor Who of ever because he is an actor. The best of them are...funny, the modern ones are just bloody clowns..."

https://anglonerd.wordpress.com/2016/12/11/terry-pratchett-on-why-david-tennant-is-the-best-doctor/

3.5 A DEFINITIVE LISTING, OR...

...not? On Buzzfeed, one Tom Chivers has posted a list of what he claims is the correct rankings-for-excellence order of all the Discworld novels. Except it's *not* all the Discworld novels, and as for his rankings, well, anyone who lists Night Watch in one of the lowest positions and Pyramids in the top three... (insert eyerolls, facepalms and headdesks here). But it's nonetheless of interest:

"Disclaimer: This list will annoy some people, but it's my list, so there. Also, I haven't included the Tiffany Aching novels and the other young-adult books, or a few other oddments such as The Last Hero. The list was long enough already, and again, it's my list. With thanks to Graeme Neill, who is behind the blog Pratchett Job, in which he's reading all of the Discworld novels in chronological order and writing about each of them."

For the record, here is Chivers' list, from his lowest-ranked to his highest:

Snuff
Monstrous Regiment
Carpe Jugulum
Thud
Sourcery
Night Watch
Eric
Thief of Time
Soul Music
Hogfather
The Fifth Elephant
The Truth
Moving Pictures
The Colour of Magic
The Light Fantastic
Equal Rites
Jingo
Going Postal
Witches Abroad
The Last Continent
Maskerade
Lords and Ladies
Mort
Interesting Times
Feet of Clay
Guards! Guards!
Men at Arms
Wyrd Sisters
Pyramids
Reaper Man
Small Gods

https://www.buzzfeed.com/tomchivers/the-definitive-listing-of-terry-pratchetts-discworld-novels

3.6 ALZHEIMER'S NEWS: DEMENTIA VIEWPOINTS, AND A CLUE IN ART

Oscar-nominated actress Carey Mulligan has seen the effects of Alzheimer's at close range, in her own family. She talked to the BBC about her activism:

The Christmas period is undoubtedly a time many of us look forward to spending with family and friends and that's no different for me. My beloved grandmother "Nans" turned 91 a couple of days before Christmas and my family and many of Nans' friends – laden with copious amounts of cake – went down to Wales to see her and celebrate. Nans and I have always been extremely close and she is the single most influential person in my life aside from my parents. But a lot has changed in our relationship in the last 12 years. Nans was diagnosed with dementia in 2004 and from that moment our lives changed significantly. But on days like Friday, when we all come together and celebrate her life with those who love her the most, there are still moments of the purest magic.

"Dementia is an urgent health crisis that we can no longer ignore. Some 850,000 people in the UK have the condition and more than 47 million people globally live with it. Its growing prevalence has improved how we, as a society, view dementia. But there is still a long way to go and the stigma of dementia remains rife... Too many common myths and misconceptions about dementia still exist. Time and again I hear reference to it as just being a natural part of ageing. And, unfortunately, it is often the butt of distasteful jokes. But dementia is a disease of the brain and it requires understanding, care and support. The first step in changing people's understanding of dementia and improving the lives of those who have the condition involves educating people not just on our doorstep, but across the world. Schemes that set out to change perceptions are doing fantastic work already. The Alzheimer's Society's Dementia Friends is a good example. It has 1.7 million people signed up to take action and change the way people think, act and talk about dementia. Through information sessions participants are asked to think about what living with dementia might be like, practically and emotionally, and are encouraged to make changes within their community to make life a bit easier for people living with dementia.

"As a global ambassador for the schemes, my aim is to raise awareness and help change global attitudes towards dementia. I recently delivered a Dementia Friends information session to an audience of 50 young people in Los Angeles. In spite of a few misconceptions about dementia they were really interested to try to understand the disease in a real way. Many of them used words like 'crazy', 'loony' etc when I first asked them what words came to mind when we thought about dementia. But by the end of the session there was a room of young people inspired to do more for those in their communities living with dementia. A young person growing up with an understanding of the illness is one of the most crucial elements of changing how it is viewed and building a dementia-friendly generation..."

http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-38405698

...and Dominic Hughes reported on how artists' changing brush strokes might reveal early signs of dementia:

"But can art – more specifically, the way artists work – tell us something about the development of dementia and other degenerative brain diseases? A minute analysis of the brushstrokes used by artists who developed neurological diseases reveals intriguing clues about changes in the brain that occurred years before any symptoms became obvious. The mathematical method is called 'fractal analysis', which is a way of looking at recurring patterns that occur both in maths and in nature. Trees and clouds are said to be 'fractal', as are the recurring patterns of our brainwaves and heartbeats. The same applies to the individual brushstrokes of artists, which can be compared to their individual handwriting.

"Psychologist Alex Forsythe from Liverpool University carried out a fractal analysis of more than two thousand works by seven famous artists and found tiny changes in those patterns. 'In artists who went on to develop dementia or Parkinson's disease, the fractal patterns started to change in an unusual way. So what we found was that up to 20 years before they actually had a diagnosis of a neurological disorder, the fractal content in the paintings had started to decrease. So anything that helps us understand more about the way in which the brain operates is a useful way to inform future directions for research.' The artist Willem de Kooning was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease after his death in 1997. The brushstroke patterns seen in his earlier work were different when compared to later paintings. But in artists like Monet and Picasso, who died free of any known neurological disease, the patterns remained constant throughout their lives. It's striking that the even though Picasso in particular changed styles so often throughout his career, his fractal range was constant, regardless of the style in which he painted..."

http://www.bbc.com/news/health-38414104

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04) DISCWORLD CONVENTION NEWS

AUSDWCON NEWS: LATEST UPDATE

THE DISCWORLD GRAND TOUR
4th-6th August 2017
Lakes Resort Hotel, West Lakes, South Australia

All aboard for the Discworld Grand Tour! Grab your ticket at the early-bird price before February 4th, 2017. (_https://ausdwcon.org/shop/tickets_)

"But it's just after Hogswatch, I can't afford that right now!" you may cry! Well, despair not! If you purchase a Supporting Membership prior to February 4th 2017, you can upgrade at a later date to the early-bird price! (_https://ausdwcon.org/shop/product/supporting-membership/_)

No tourist is complete without a cheesy hat or t-shirt, and we've got plenty available! Check out our full range of souvenirs at https://ausdwcon.org/shop/souvenirs/

And of course, for all the information about the Discworld Grand Tour, including activities, venue, and more, visit our website at http://ausdwcon.org

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05) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

5.1 PLAYS IN JANUARY AND FEBRUARY 2017

* MONSTROUS REGIMENT IN SOUTHAMPTON (JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2017)

The Nuffield Southampton Theatre will present their production of Monstrous Regiment next month!

When: 31st January – 4th February 2017
Venue: NST (Nuffield Southampton Theatres), University Road, Southampton SO17 1TR
Time: 7.30pm all shows
Tickets: £13 (concessions £10, under-16s £8, groups of 10 or more £10), available from the Box Office (phone 023 8067 1771) or online at https://www.nstheatres.co.uk/whats-on/monstrous-regiment/book

Note: there is a special 2-for-1 student offer on Wednesday only. Also worth noting: the Friday show is already nearly sold out!

https://www.nstheatres.co.uk/whats-on/monstrous-regiment

* TAMAHER IN CARDIFF (FEBRUARY 2017)

Monstrous Productions' next offering is The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents.

When: 22nd–25th February 2017
Venue: The Gate Theatre, Keppoch Street, Roath, Cardiff CF24 3JW
Time: 7.30pm (2.30pm matinee on the 25th)
Tickets: £7 (£5 concession), available from http://monstrousproductions.fikket.com/

* MORT IN OREGON (FEBRUARY 2017)

The Majestic Theatre in Corvallis, Oregon, USA will be staging their production of Mort in February.

"DEATH is always right behind us. But if he were in front of us, and this were the fantastical Discworld invented by the late Sir Terry Pratchett, Death would also be a seven-foot skeleton with a black robe and a scythe. And when Death is in front of young Mort, he also has an offer of an apprenticeship. In this hilarious overview of life, love, and death (not in that order), Mort finds himself living in Death's abode, but when he finally gets a chance to do the job, his mistakes cause reality to be sliced in half, with a beautiful princess somewhere between life and death and not very happy about it. Surrounded by panicked wizards, arrogant royalty, goofy drunks, and short-order chefs, Mort and Death must confront their own fears in order to restore order, and figure out who lives, and who's fired!"

When: 10th, 11th, 12th, 16th, 17th, 18th and 19th February 2017 (performances on the 12th and 19th are matinees)
Venue: Main stage, The Majestic Theatre, 115 SW 2nd Street, Corvallis, OR 97333
Time: 10th, 11th, 16th, 17th and 18th February at 7:30pm; 12th and 19th February at 2:30pm
Tickets: $16 (students and "seniors" $14), available online at https://app.arts-people.com/index.php?actions=13&p=1 or from the Box Office (phone 541-738-7469).
Box Office Hours: 12:00pm – 5:00pm, Wednesday – Friday during periods of active production. The Box Office is also open 75 minutes before all performances.
Please note that there will be no late seating.

http://www.majestic.org/

5.2 PLAYS IN MARCH 2017

* CARPE JUGULUM IN NOTTINGHAM (MARCH 2017)

The Lace Market Youth Theatre present Carpe Jugulum, "a pastiche of vampire literature playing with mythic archetypes and featuring a tongue in cheek reversal of 'vampyre' subculture with young vampires who wear bright clothes, drink wine and stay up till noon", in March.

When: 22nd–25th March 2017
Venue: The Lace Market Theatre, Halifax Place, Nottingham NG1 1QN
Time: 7.30pm all evening shows; 2.30pm Saturday 25th matinee
Tickets: £11 (£10 concessions), available online at http://bit.ly/2dIKhod or by phoning 0115 950 7201

https://lacemarkettheatre.co.uk/LaceMarketTheatre.dll/WhatsOn

* WYRD SISTERS IN BOLTON, LANCS (MARCH 2017)

Bolton Little Theatre, "a vibrant amateur theatre company run by members" since 1931, will be staging their production of Wyrd Sisters in March.

When: 6th–11th March 2017
Venue: Bolton Little Theatre, Hanover Street, Bolton BL1 4TG
Time: 7.30pm
Tickets: £10 (Monday night 3 for 2 special), available at https://www.ticketsource.co.uk/boltonlittletheatre or https://www.ticketsource.co.uk/event/EFILHL – group bookings of 10+ (£9) should be booked through the Box Office. "You can book at Bolton Little Theatre box office in person or by telephone on Monday night from 7.30 to 9pm and Friday mornings from 10.30 to 12 noon – no extra charge if paying by cash or cheque and you can book during the run of the plays or you can book online at boltonlittletheatre.ticketsource.co.uk ...credit card charges will apply. Tickets can be e-tickets (no charge) mobile phone ticket (50p) standard post (£1.50)."

http://www.boltonlittletheatre.co.uk/terry-pratchetts-wyrd-sisters/

5.3 PLAYS LATER IN 2017

* LORDS AND LADIES IN BRISBANE (SEPTEMBER–OCTOBER 2017)

Brisbane Arts Theatre will be presenting their next Discworld play, Lords and Ladies – adapted by Irana brown – next September!

"Granny Weatherwax and Nanny Ogg – the witches of Lancre – are the Discworld's only hope of rescue when elves threaten to take control with their hypnotic 'glamour'. Standing stones, wizards, Morris men, rude mechanicals, country lore and ancient magic all combine in this adaptation of one of Sir Terry's finest. With a full supporting cast of dwarves, wizards, trolls and one orangutan, the hilarious Lords and Ladies delivers an abundance of hey-nonny-nonny and blood all over the place."

When: 16th September – 21st October 2017
Venue: Brisbane Arts Theatre, 210 Petrie Terrace, Brisbane, QLD 4000
Time: 7.30pm Thursdays, 8.00pm Fridays & Saturdays, 6.30pm Sundays
Tickets: Adults $34, Concession $28, Group 10+ $27, Student Rush $15 (10 mins before curtain), available online at http://sa2.seatadvisor.com/sabo/servlets/TicketRequest?&presenter=AUBAT&event=LANDL
"Subscribers can redeem season tickets for this show. There are no refunds or exchanges once tickets have been purchased."

http://www.artstheatre.com.au/show/lordsandladies

5.4 REVIEWS

* REVIEW: MORT IN HARROGATE

By Kate Albrecht, in the Harrogate Advertiser:

"'It would seem that you have no useful talent whatsoever. Have you thought of going into teaching?' So writes Terry Pratchett. Death goes to the Jobcentre to look for a new job, having handed over the reins of Binky the horse to a hapless farm boy, in Terry Pratchett's highly popular novel Mort. Woodlands Drama Group presented the stage adaptation by Stephen Briggs at Harrogate Theatre with Julie James as producer/director. A very busy cast included Mark Dove with sepulchrally-amplified voice as Death, Max Albrecht as Mort, Brian Hey as the wizard Cutwell, Frankie Sharp as Death's daughter Ysabell, and Jonathan Hill as his manservant Albert. Ian Clarke, Jemma Bunting, Ben Pollard, Sarah Blackamore, Keiran Lancaster and Rosie Day all created distinct characters in multiple roles. A convoluted plot is kicked into action when Mort fails to collect the soul of Princess Keli (well played by Liz Watt) and kills her would-be assassin instead. Costume, lighting and sound departments all clearly had plenty to do; weapons and accessories were designed and made by Helen and Toby Albrecht; and the direction made excellent use of the limited space. It was a welcome treat for Pratchettphiles, and a good introduction to the Discworld creator's barmy universe for those who have always needed one but were afraid to ask."

http://bit.ly/2hT1qtT

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06) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS: UPDATES AND REMINDERS

The Broken Drummers, "London's Premier Unofficially Official Discworld Group" (motto "Nil percussio est"), meets next on Monday 9th January 2017 at the Monkey Puzzle, 30 Southwick Street, London, W2 1JQ.

For more information, go to http://brokendrummers.org/ or email BrokenDrummers@gmail.com or nicholls.helen@yahoo.co.uk

*

Canberra, Australia's Discworld fan group is Drumknott's Irregulars: "The group is open to all, people from interstate and overseas are welcome, and our events will not be heavily themed. Come along to dinner for a chat and good company. We welcome people all all fandoms (and none) and we would love to see you at one of our events, even if you're just passing through. Please contact us via Facebook (_https://www.facebook.com/groups/824987924250161/_) or Google Groups (_https://groups.google.com/forum/#!forum/drumknotts-irregulars_) or join us at our next event."

*

For Facebook users in Fourecks: The Victorian Discworld Klatch is "a social group for fans of Discworld and Terry Pratchett... run by a dedicated team who meet monthly and organise events monthly." "If you'd like to join our events please ask to join the Klatch."

https://www.facebook.com/groups/VictorianDiscworldKlatch

*

"The Gathering of the Loonies (Wincanton chapter)" is a public Facebook meeting group: "This group, by request of Jo in Bear will continue to be used for future unofficial (not run by the Emporium) fan Gatherings in Wincanton. Look here for information." [Editor's note: this is an active group. If you use Facebook, it may be worth joining!]

https://www.facebook.com/groups/373578522834654/

*

The Pratchett Partisans are a fan group who meet monthly at either Brisbane or Indooroopilly to "eat, drink and chat about all things Pratchett. We hold events such as Discworld dinners, games afternoons, Discworld photo scavenger hunts. We also attend opening night at Brisbane Arts Theatre's Discworld plays." The Partisans currently have about 200 members who meet at least twice a month, usually in Brisbane.

For more info about their next meetup, join up at https://www.facebook.com/groups/pratchettpartisans/ or contact Ula directly at uwilmott@yahoo.com.au

*

The City of Small Gods is a group for fans in Adelaide and South Australia: "We have an established Terry Pratchett & Discworld fan group in Adelaide called The City of Small Gods, which is open to anyone who would like to come - you don't have to live in Adelaide or even South Australia, or even be a Discworld fan, but that's mostly where our events will be held, and we do like discussing Pratchett's works. Our (semi-) regular meetings are generally held on the last Thursday of the month at a pub or restaurant in Adelaide. We have dinner at 6.30pm followed by games until 9pm. The games are usually shorter games like Pairs, Sushi Go, or Tiny Epic Defenders, with the occasional Werewolf session, as these are the best sort of games that work in a pub setting. Every few months, we have a full day's worth of board games at La Scala Cafe, 169 Unley Rd, Unley in the function room starting at 10am. In addition, we will occasionally have other events to go and see plays by Unseen Theatre Company, book discussions, craft, chain maille or costuming workshops or other fun social activities."

The next CoSG event will be a Board Games Day at La Scala Cafe on 15th January. For more info, go to www.cityofsmallgods.org.au

*

The Broken Vectis Drummers meet next on Thursday 5th January 2017 (probably) from 7.30pm at The Castle pub in Newport, Isle of Wight. For more info and any queries, contact broken_vectis_drummers@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Wincanton Omnian Temperance Society (WOTS) next meets on Friday 6th January 2017 (probably) at Wincanton's famous Bear Inn from 7pm onwards. "Visitors and drop-ins are always welcome!"

*

The Northern Institute of the Ankh-Morpork and District Society of Flatalists, a Pratchett fangroup, has been meeting on a regular basis since 2005. The Flatalists normally meet at The Narrowboat Pub in Victoria Street, Skipton, North Yorkshire, to discuss "all things Pratchett" as well as having quizzes and raffles. Details of future meetings are posted on the Events section of the Discworld Stamps forum:

http://www.discworldstamps.co.uk/forum/

*

Sydney Drummers (formerly Drummers Downunder) meet next on Monday 9th January 2017 at 6.30pm (probably, since Monday 2nd January is a public holiday) in Sydney at 3 Wise Monkeys, 555 George Street, Sydney,2000. For more information, contact Sue (aka Granny Weatherwax): kenworthys@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Treacle Mining Corporation, formerly known as Perth Drummers, meets next on Monday 9th January 2017 (probably, see above) from 5.30pm at Carpe Cafe, 526 Murray Street, Perth, Western Australia. For details follow Perth Drummers on Twitter @Perth_Drummers or join their Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/Perth.Drummers/ – or message Alexandra Ware directly at <alexandra.ware@gmail.com>

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07) AROUND THE BLOGOSPHERE: HOGFATHER

The Hogfather audiobook, reviewed by blogger Jonathan Feinstein:

"If I have any complaint it is that this audio-edition was abridged. A lot of really good stuff was cut out – oh nothing directly important to hold the plot together, but details and sometimes details matter, such as when Susan reminds one of her young charges to stop speaking with the exaggerated childish lisp she puts on just to be cute. It is a point that repeats several times in the story to good effect, but which was scrubbed from the abridged edition. Or of the scene in which Corporal Nobby Nobbs of the Ankh Morpork City Watch approaches Death, now playing the Hogfather at a Department store. Nobbs is unable to actually arrest the Hogfather and, instead, falls back on habits learned as a child and sits on the Hogfather's knee. Even Death is unable to exactly figure out Nobbs, though and asks things like 'AND WHAT'S YOUR NAME, LITTLE... PERSON?' and 'AND HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BO... A GOOD INDIVIDUAL?' Fun stuff and I'm sorry it got left out.

"The book is read by Tony Robinson who played Baldrick in the Blackadder series. He also appeared at the department store owner in the Hogfather TV adaptation. For the most part he reads wonderfully, but he does not quite get Death's voice right. He just does not have the deep resonant voice of Ian Richardson or Christopher Lee (both of whom have provided the voice of Death in Discworld adaptations) and his attempt to talk in a Deathly whisper pales beside those other actors who have tried. However, the rest of the reading is excellently done and well worth the time to listen to..."

https://jonathanfeinstein.wordpress.com/2016/12/25/an-audio-book-review-a-rather-different-holiday-story/

...and the print version, by blogger katyboo1:

"Hogfather is one of the stories with Death in, who I increasingly grow to love as the series goes on. Death becomes more complex, more thoughtful, more critical of humanity and indeed more human as the books progress. Death, in lots of ways, reminds me of Dr. Who in the way that he regards the human race. Always saving them, always baffled by them, can't help loving them... Many fine and beloved characters make their appearance in this book, which is one of the reasons we love it so. Bloody Stupid Johnson and his almost perfect bathroom in the Unseen University, Ridcully the arch chancellor and the bursar with his dried frog pills, Hex and his growing complexities, and even Corporal Nobby Nobs all get a look in on this seasonal and brilliant volume in the series..."

https://makingthemreaders.wordpress.com/2016/12/24/hogfather-by-terry-pratchett-a-book-review/

Recommended by blogger Heidi Teague for Debut magazine:

"There's nothing twee or sickly sweet about Hogfather, this is proper dark and wintery fare; think more of midwinter festivals and Pagan traditions than of the commercialised, sanitised Christmas seen in TV adverts. But it's all the better for that; children and adults alike relish the dark to balance the light, which is why fairy tales remain so popular. If Hogfather was to be likened to anything, The Nightmare Before Christmas is the best comparison; in fact the plots are somewhat parallel. The protagonists of this particular story are not your typical heroes; Susan is a young grim nanny who can see rather more than she would like, she's more Mary Shelley than Mary Poppins. Working hard to be the saviour of Hogswatch so the children aren't disappointed is Susan's grandfather, none other than Death himself. A mostly good-natured fellow, he doesn't always quite get humans and sometimes he'll take their wishes rather too literally, but he does appreciate cats.

"Terry Pratchett's writing is effortless to read; the humour is deft yet laugh out loud, and he knows just how to stay on the right side of eerie, much like Roald Dahl. The Discworld books are numerous and sprawling, yet can largely be dipped into at any point. Hogfather is an enjoyable stand-alone, or an excellent introduction to Discworld. If you enjoy this, I recommend reading more of the series..."

https://debutmagazine.co.uk/2016/12/22/character-reference-books-hogfather/

...and by blogger Clyde Umney:

"You may hear how funny [Pratchett] is – and he is undeniably that – or how wonderful Discworld is as a blending of the issues of our world and Pratchett's wondrous fantasy creation, and you think, okay, I get it. But what you don't understand until you read Pratchett was how profound and humane he could be, and how astonishingly complex his seemingly 'silly' stories could be. After all, who else could take the concept of Hogfather – in which Death takes over for Discworld's version of Santa Claus – and turn it into a profound, complex exploration of the importance of faith, belief, and fairy tales as a fundamental aspect of humanity? No one, I'd argue... and even if someone tried, it's hard to imagine them doing it as effortlessly, comically, and brilliantly as Pratchett manages... Pratchett uses his gleefully madcap plot – which incorporates a slew of local criminals, the secret life of tooth fairies, the god of hangovers, and so much more – to begin discussing the nature of belief, the importance of fairy tales to human existence, the nature of folk tales, and so much more. And if that's not enough, he still manages to get in his jabs at human existence – at the cruelties of tragedies in the holiday season, the hypocrisy of charity, and so much more. It's a book whose satirical edge is sharp and takes no prisoners, and yet never passes the chance to make you laugh, and laugh hard…but it will hit you in the gut right after it..."

https://clydeumney.wordpress.com/2016/12/21/hogfather-by-terry-pratchett/

Pratchett newbie Mysha-Tatiana took on Hogfather as her first essay into Discworld, and was intrigued:

"There's a lot to love about this book. It's sense of humor and the general absurdity of the plot at times had me inwardly chuckling to myself. I loved Death in this story. Just absolutely loved it. Especially as the Hogfather. There's just something so absurd about that premise and I loved how it was executed. I also really enjoyed the book's overall meditations on the nature of belief. The book's main conflict comes when the Auditors, beings that provide checks to the universe, tries to off the Hogfather because he represents one of the biggest examples of humanity's 'untruthfulness.' Due to the vacuum that the absence of the Hogfather creates, the leftover magic brings things into beings that are brought about by human imagination. As an example, if you ever wondered why socks always go missing when you put them in the laundry, you could reasonably conclude that it's because something (goblin, fairy, low level god) was stealing them away. Things exist to us when we believe they do and these conversations turned out to be the most interesting parts of the novel to me... I was unfamiliar with Discworld and I always felt like I was missing out on something because I hadn't completed any books prior to this one which is my own fault. I'll own that. I ended up liking what came in the end and couldn't put the book down for the last 100 pages..."

https://creativelyaddled.wordpress.com/2016/12/14/hogfather-review/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

The cast of the Woodlands Drama Group's recent production of Mort, featuring a perfect-looking Mort and Cutwell:
http://bit.ly/2hsTmAj

A wonderfully amusing letter from The Author, as tweeted by Letters of Note:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CzK-WG8WEAA86ZM.jpg

Another piece of Paul Kidby Discworld art:
"French publishers L'Atalante have requested to use my cover art for Terry Pratchett's Johnny Maxwell series, here is Johnny & the Bomb, painted in 2013."
http://bit.ly/2hayi1g

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09) CLOSE

And as the last hours of 2016 tick away, Wossname wishes all you Readers and your friends and family an exciting (but not too exciting) Year of the Backwards Facing Artichoke, filled with interesting (but not *too* interesting) times. See you next month – and next year!

– Annie Mac

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The End. If you have any questions or requests, write: wossname-owner (at) pearwood (dot) info

Copyright (c) 2016 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

Nullus Anxietas VI - The Australian Discworld Convention

THE DISCWORLD GRAND TOUR

4th-6th August 2017
Lakes Resort Hotel, West Lakes, South Australia

All aboard for the Discworld Grand Tour!

Grab your ticket at the early-bird price before February 4th, 2017.

"But it's just after Hogswatch, I can't afford that right now!" you may cry! Well, despair not! If you purchase a Supporting Membership prior to February 4th 2017, you can upgrade at a later date to the early-bird price!

No tourist is complete without a cheesy hat or t-shirt, and we've got plenty available! Check out our full range of souvenirs at https://ausdwcon.org/shop/souvenirs/

And of course, for all the information about the Discworld Grand Tour, including activities, venue, and more, visit our website at http://ausdwcon.org

Find us on Facebook at https://facebook.com/Ausdwcon and on Twitter at https://twitter.com/ausdwcon

...the Year of the Backwards Facing Artichoke. At least according to the good folk at Cunning Artificer HQ, aka the Discworld Emporium. And as they're located in Wincanton, official twin town of Ankh-Morpork, we have to assume they'd know!

Here be the Emporium’s rather spiffy artwork for the YotBFA:

To view it in its original posting, go to the this post on the Discworld Emporium's Twitter account.

Wossname
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
December 2015 (Volume 18, Issue 12, Post 1)

********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a free publication offering news, reviews, and all the other stuff-that-fits pertaining to the works of Sir Terry Pratchett. Originally founded by the late, great Joe Schaumburger for members of the worldwide Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North American Discworld Society and other continental groups, Wossname is now for Discworld and Pratchett fans everywhere in Roundworld.
********************************************************************

Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
News Editor: Vera P
Newshounds: Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow, Wolfiekins, Mss C, Alison not Aliss
Staff Writers: Asti, Pitt the Elder, Evil Steven Dread, Mrs Wynn-Jones
Staff Technomancers: Jason Parlevliet, Archchancellor Neil, DJ Helpful
Book Reviews: Annie Mac, Drusilla D'Afanguin, Your Name Here
Puzzle Editor: Tiff (still out there somewhere)
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
Emergency Staff: Steven D'Aprano, Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare time)

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

INDEX:

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH
02) EDITOR'S LETTER
03) RHIANNA PRATCHETT'S YEAR'S-END TRIBUTE TO HER FATHER
04) ODDS AND SODS
05) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS
06) DISCWORLD GAMES NEWS
07) DISCWORLD ARTS AND CRAFTS NEWS
08) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS
09) DISCWORLD CONVENTION NEWS
10) ROUNDWORLD TALES: HO, THE MEGAPODE!
11) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
12) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH

"Terry's final day of writing was exactly one year ago today. We spent the morning working on his biography and we laughed. A lot. Later, he called Rod Brown – MD of @Narrativia_Ltd – and Mark, his accountant, before heading back down to the house. He then called @rhipratchett for a chat over a cup of tea and we talked about the next novel. Specifically, which one should come next. And then – on December 8th – after such a blessedly slow decline, PCA became Alzheimer's and nothing was ever quite the same again. Mind how you go, Terry."
  – Rob Wilkins, 5th December 2015, on the official @terryandrob Twitter account, hashtagged #speakhisname

"I like to think that wherever Dad is now, there is a hat on his head, a stick in his hand and a whistle on his lips. There's probably a cat about somewhere too. There should always be a cat."
  – Rhianna Pratchett, in her tribute to Sir Pterry in The Guardian, 25th December 2015

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR

  Well now, here we are in the final hours of the final day of the year that was 2015, and to my own astonishment I seem to have managed to out together a December issue of sorts. It's been a very odd month for me (don't arsk), and somehow the various book and play and game reviews that were meant to be in this issue have yet to come into being. Here's hoping the January issue will be more, erm, inclusive. And extensive. And other words ending in -ive. But meanwhile...

  In a somewhat bizarre "listicle" on Dread Central, one David Gelmini puts the "Discworld Death Trilogy" in his "Top 5 Horror Book Series You Should Be Reading". In the relevant section, he says, "I know what you're thinking: That sounds more like comic fantasy than horror. Well, hear me out... one of the major recurring characters in the series, who appeared in nearly every book, was Death, depicted in his classic skeletal grim reaper form. Three of the books in the series – Mort, Reaper Man, and Soul Music – were known as the 'Death Trilogy' and featured Death as a protagonist rather than a supporting player, so if that doesn't place them in the horror category, then I don't know what does."

  Yes, Mr Gelmini, that's right: you don't know what does. The whole point of Pratchett's most famous anthropomorphic personification is that the character of Death is a *sympathetic* character, that the author took a traditional figure of horror and turned it into a kind of person, an entity with definite character and definite opinions – an entity that endlessly strives to understand humans as more than mere stalks for the reaper's scythe, to the point of undertaking human activities and adopting and raising a child. If that doesn't place the Death of Discworld in the *not*-horror category, then I don't know what does.

  And staying on the subject of grim reapers, do have a look at the Discworld Emporium's adorable new Death of Rats plushie in Item 7. As cuddly and not-horrible as any Death can ever be...

[Editor's note: if you want to read the Dread Central listicle on the web, go to http://bit.ly/1NGuu2F ]

  On with the show! Even if it's a very short one...

– Annie Mac, Editor

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) RHIANNA PRATCHETT'S TRIBUTE TO HER FATHER

In The Guardian, a loving remembrance at the end of the year of loss:

  "The reaper came for my father much earlier in his life in the form of Death from his world-famous and much-loved Discworld novels. Death was a towering, cloaked and scythe-wielding skeleton who had a penchant for curries, a love of cats and TALKED LIKE THIS. We got a number of tear-inducing letters from fans who were nearing the end of their lives and took great comfort in imagining that the death that came for them would be riding a white horse called Binky. Dad had done something with more success than anyone else – he made Death friendly.. Dad was a great observer of people. And when he ran out of actual people, he was a great imaginer of them. Both his grannies come through in his witch characters, while there's a fair chunk of me in Tiffany Aching and Susan Sto Helit, Death's adoptive granddaughter. He always said that he was most like the brusque Commander Vimes, raging against injustice. But he was a little like Death too; always loved a good curry and Pratchetts have cats like other people have bathrooms...

  "His funeral showed me that my father meant many things to many people, and we were all grieving for different versions of him, when he felt most ours. For my mother, it was their early years together when they were semi self-sufficient, grew their own vegetables and had goats in the front garden and chickens in the back. For his manager Rob, it was sitting side by side, helping him keep the words flowing and making him the odd 'glug' – a coffee with a tot of brandy. Or, on harder days, a brandy with a tot of coffee. For me, the dad I grieved most for, and still do, is the one I remember as a kid.., Dad was someone who committed to the narrative of a situation rather more than the practicality. So he would wrap me up and take me out of bed in the middle of the night to show me the glow-worms in the hedge or Halley's Comet blazing across a star-filled sky. For him, his daughter seeing these marvels of nature was much more important than sleeping, which I could do any time. He didn't teach me magic, he showed me it..."

To read the full piece – and oh yes, you should! – go to http://bit.ly/1ShsLnI

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

04) ODDS AND SODS

4.1 PAUL KIDBY REFLECTS

Paul Kidby looks back on 2015:

  "When the call came to tell me of his death on the morning of the 12th of March I was working on my first draught for the cover of The Shepherd's Crown and it is undoubted that my feelings leaked down my pencil into the drawing and Tiffany developed a sorrowful gaze. When I amended the cover for a second draught I had come to terms with things a little and I think it is again reflected in the face of Tiffany. This time she looks perhaps a little sad but I like to think that her knowledge of the patterns of life and natural order of things shine out with a touch of defiance mingled with an inner peace and happiness. I choose to celebrate Terry's life and all the joy it brought to many and I hope my final cover of a Discworld novel pays tribute to him as a fitting mark of my great respect.

  "The Tiffany Aching books are special to me as both Terry and I share a love of the Chalk landscape where he lived and for a time so did I. Capturing aspects of this special place is always a treat for me and working on The Shepherd's Crown was a moving experience, as I drew I remembered the conversations Terry & I used to have about gardening, folklore and recipes for nettle soup (good fodder for starving artists!) The chalk landscape with its ancient drove roads and wide skies seemed to exert a creative energy for us both. I am comforted by the knowledge that this landscape will endure..."

http://bit.ly/1Zk1nY1

Editor's note: please do visit this page to see the drawings that accompany the text. Be ready for strong feelings...

4.2 COVER ART FOR THE LONG COSMOS

...which will, of course, be published in June 2016: http://bit.ly/1ITaw5I

4.3 GOOD OMENS AND HOGFATHER REMEMBERED

A loving look back at Good Omens, by Justine Jordan in The Guardian:

  "Twenty-five years on, the book has lasted surprisingly well. Pratchett and Gaiman's obsession with tech meant they were ahead of the curve when it came to the 'slim computers' that demon Crowley likes so much. Some things haven't changed: 'All that lather comes up from the centre of the Earth, where it's all hot,' says a member of Adam's gang. 'I saw a programme. It had David Attenborough, so it's true.' And the real end of the world that Adam foresees is closer and scarier than ever: 'Everyone's goin' around usin' up all the whales and coal and oil and ozone and rainforests and that, and there'll be none left for us. We should be goin' to Mars and stuff, instead of sittin' around in the dark and wet with the air spillin' away.' I remember longing, after finishing Good Omens all those years ago, for another Pratchett/Gaiman book, something that was never likely to happen and is of course impossible now. In retrospect, it seems amazing that two such singular and prolific creative energies could share the writing of a novel..."

http://bit.ly/1Yf5esg

...and a paean to Hogfather, by Katharine Trendacosta on i09:

  "Hogfather mercilessly deconstructs a lot of the usual Christmas tales, while ultimately still coming down on the side of belief being important. Death stops the Little Match Girl from dying, as she does in the story, since the best gift he can give her is a 'future.' And there's also a great big problem with being a jerk every other day, and deciding to be charitable just for Christmas, like Good King Wenceslas. Death's also confused by the things he's supposed to do as the Hogfather, wondering if checking his list twice is 'enough.' There are a lot of problems with Christmas myths, Pratchett points out, but children's belief in Santa is not one of them. Pratchett himself was an atheist, but not of the science and logic kind. The embodiment of scientific rules and rationality in Discworld are the Auditors, and they're the villains..."

http://bit.ly/1RQJnSV

4.4 REVIEW: GOING POSTAL

Nice review of Going Postal in the University of Washington Daily:

  "The book is unique, silly, and therefore a classic Pratchett novel. Every paragraph has a joke (even if they can be obscure), each character has a valid point to make, and the plot makes sense while still staying true to a classic form. The writing is dead-easy to understand and parse — great for kids — but has enough puns to last an adult reader a lifetime. There's something wholesome about these books — even though the words themselves definitely aren't — that make them great to read on a bad day. So, forget your muted, boring daily life, and enter the bright world of the Discworld..."

http://bit.ly/1lus8Kz

4.5 POINT-AND-CLICK DISCWORLD MEMORIES

The point-and-click 1990s game "Discworld" remembered, by David Fox on Moviepilot:

  "It's hard to over-emphasise just how big a deal it was for young me that I could play my favourite style of game based on my favourite novels! Discworld put you in the role of Rincewind, the main protagonist of the early Discworld novels and the worst wizard in the world. He's voiced by Monty Python's Eric Idle in a performance so pitch perfect that I hear his voice in my head when I re-read the Rincewind-starring novels. Idle is joined by other British comic actors including Rob Brydon and Tony Robinson, and the top quality voice acting – along with the hilarious script that really translates Pratchett's humour from page to screen – is a big plus in Discworld's favour."

http://moviepilot.com/posts/3670561

4.6 REVIEW: SMALL GODS

A savvy review of Small Gods and its Roundworld relevance, by Wayne Gregson in the Bendigo Advertiser:

  "It's been a bad year for losing talented, prolific writers. But I'm particularly missing Sir Terry Pratchett, the British former journalist who created the mad-but-sane satirical universe of Discworld. I was thinking about him after watching the TV news the other night, and wondering if all the world's wars would end if leaders were forced to read Pratchett's Small Gods. Most wars are about differences in religion, or at least people using difference in religion as an excuse to steal stuff. Most of the differences are fabricated, petty and pointless. It is most clearly shown in the wildly complex alliances, hatred, bombings, invasions and murders in the Middle East, which – on the tellie at least – looks like madmen fighting over shattered rocks and pulverised dirt.

  "Good science fiction and science fantasy teaches us something about ourselves. It's possible to tease out concepts when you put them in an unfamiliar environment. In Small Gods, Pratchett explores the religious power of the once Great God Om and pumps up the idea that the supernatural sphere has many, many gods, some bloated arrogant things and some not so big. It just all depends on how many people the gods can get to believe in them. Or to just follow them. Like a Facebook or Twitter fanatic..."

http://bit.ly/1lRcyJI

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05) DISCWORLD PLAYS NEWS

5.0 HAPPY HOGSWATCH FROM UNSEEN THEATRE!

Pamela Munt writes:

"We at Unseen would like to take this opportunity to thank all of our loyal patrons for their support during 2015.
We could never do it without you, the audience to cheer us along!

"You may have noticed that our website badly needs some updating which I hope to get time to do over the break.

"Meanwhile, the hot news is that you should keep an eye out for 'The Wee Free Men' in April (15th to 30th). More news on this later.

"I hope that you all enjoy your Hogswatch break!"

Also, a reminder for the cast of The Wee Free Men: "Don't forget! First rehearsal after our Christmas Break is THIS coming Sunday 3rd Jan at 3pm. (please enter via red foyer door in Cardwell St). There is also a production meeting afterwards at 6pm.! (for Heads of Departments - all of them this time). See you all there!"

5.1 REMINDER: ERIC IN CARDIFF (FEBRUARY 2016)

Monstrous Productions are going from strength to strength! Having raised over £16,000 for Alzheimer's Research UK so far through ticket sales for their Discworld plays – including £4,000 for their recent and much lauded production of Night Watch – the company is now set to tackle Eric in the new year!

When: 18th, 19th and 20th February 2016
Venue: The Gate Arts Centre, Keppoch Street, Roath, Cardiff CF24 3JW Box Office (029) 2048 3344
Time: 7pm all evening shows; 2pm matinee on Saturday 20th
Tickets: £7 (£5 concessions). To purchase online, go to http://7889269b08cd.fikket.com/

"Tickets are now on sale for Eric! They're a bit cheaper than usual as the play is shorter. Please be aware that there is one performance less than usual too so there will be fewer tickets available."

5.2 REMINDER: MORT IN YORK, 2016: AUDITIONS!

We Are Theatre, a performance group particularly dedicated to engaging community and disability, will be presenting their production of Mort next June – the 21st and 22nd, at the Joseph Rowntree Theatre in York. But first, it's auditions time! Charlotte and Donna of We are Theatre tell us: "York is readily accessible via transport and as a company, we have an open door policy, so we do not have a core membership, instead holding open auditions and casting from those auditions for each show."

When: 10th, 17th and 24th January 2016
Time: late afternoon/early evening. To book an audition, contact wearetheatre@googlemail.com or ring 07521 364107, and give the following information: name, age (if under 18), email address, telephone number, and preferred audition date.

Rehearsals for the June dates will be held on Sunday afternoons/evenings "from Spring 2016 onwards".

www.wearetheatre.co.uk

5.3 REMINDER: THE SHAKESPEARE CODEX TICKETS!

"Tickets will be on general sale from 10 January 2016. We're expecting quite a lot of interest in this show, so early booking (particularly for the weekend performances) is recommended. More news on the show here, as it happens. There will be four evening performances, plus a matinee on the Saturday. Tickets are £10.00 (Wed, Thu) and £11.00 (Fri, Sat mat and evening). Block bookings (6 & over) will be available for the Wed and Thu performances only."

http://www.shakespearecodex.co.uk/
http://www.studiotheatreclub.com/whats-next

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

06) DISCWORLD GAMES NEWS

CLACKS UPDATES AND NEW BACKSPINDLE PROJECTS

The lads at Backspindle Games, makers of the Guards! Guards! and Clacks boardgames, say:

  "For a limited period our new Clacks board game together with a beautifully sculpted miniature of Moist von Lipwig (that can be used in the cooperative race game) can now be ordered together here:

http://bit.ly/1OqgLKt

  "If you already have Clacks and you'd just like the Moist von Lipwig miniature, it is also available for a limited period too.

  "The last ever print-run of Guards! Guards! has been completed. So if you want a copy for yourself or a friend to keep before they are all gone, copies can still be ordered here (FREE UK delivery):

http://bit.ly/1TnwP4b

  "It's fun game for 2-6 players and "a great evening's entertainment", according to one fan! Every game has 90 illustrated Discworld character cards, each with a quote about them taken from Sir Terry's books.

  "We are delighted to confirm Ninja Division (_www.ninjadivision.com_) will be stocking our Discworld games for US and Canadian customers in 2016.

  "Thank you for enjoying our games and reading our news. A peaceful New Year to all!"

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

07) DISCWORLD ARTS AND CRAFTS NEWS

DISCWORLD EMPORIUM UPDATES

  "Ever dreamed of living in Ankh-Morpork? Why not grab a slice of the Big Wahoonie with your very own piece of Discworld 'Unreal Estate'! Back with a new look, our 'Portal Properties' portfolio contains your lease, tenancy agreement & property specifications, along with a delicious illustration of your home by EA illustrator Jonathan Kirtz! Also included is a neighbourhood guide to help you settle in to your new surroundings, and a free key-chain for the first 500 new residents!"

Each piece of Unreal Estate is priced at £10. For more information, and to order, go to:

http://bit.ly/1MFVNpE

About the illustrator: http://www.jkirtz.com/

  "Our solid silver unisex pendant & chain features Great A'tuin by Joe McLaren in a cool satin finish. Smithed by real craftsmen in the historic workshops of Birmingham's Jewellery Quarter, each pendant is stamped with the Discworld and sterling silver hallmarks."

Each Great A'Tuin necklace is priced at £45. For more information, and to order, go to:

http://bit.ly/1JeBfd8

  "Introducing our limited edition festive stamps and souvenirs! This year's Hogswatch issues feature three designs created on behalf of the Sunshine Sanctuary for Sick Dragons, and illustrated by Peter Dennis. By collecting these marvellous issues you'll help provide vital aid for the Sanctuary's residents. Each $1 stamp is available to own as a set of 3 single stamps, in stunning whole sheets or in the latest 'Little Brown Envelope' Edition from Tuesday 1st December."

The Sunshine Sanctuary stamps are available as a sheet of 24 stamps, priced at £12, or a set of three single stamps, priced at £1.50. For more information, and to order, go to:

http://bit.ly/1JeBBAC

  "The Sunshine Sanctuary Hogswatch Appeal First Day Cover is a limited edition of 200 envelopes. Each cover bears this year's $1 Hogswatch Issues, marked with an exclusive Sunshine Sanctuary Frank, and swamp dragon illustrations by Peter Dennis! Includes an A5 fold-out appeal insert for your kind consideration. Available from Tuesday 1st December."

The Sunshine Sanctuary First Day Cover is priced at £7.50. For more information, and to order, go to:

http://bit.ly/1QWu3Fx

  "NEW IN! Add a little 'Ook' and SQUEAK to your bookshelves this Hogswatch with Discworld plushies designed by cartoonist and comic book artist Ray Friesen! ...because who wouldn't love to wake up to a little Death of Rats under the tree (apart from the family hamster)!"

The Discworld Plushies are priced at £15 each. For more information, and to order, go to:

http://bit.ly/1YMVuG6

  "Granny's iconic borrowing sign recreated as a beautiful silver pendant and chain, smithed by real craftsmen in the historic workshops of Birmingham's Jewellery Quarter. A precious and essential accessory for any aspiring witch!!"

The I Ate'nt Dead necklace is priced at £45. For more information, and to order, go to:

http://www.discworldemporium.com/I%20ATE'NT%20DEAD%20Necklace

  "The Emporium is now in hibernation. You are more than welcome to place orders at this time but please be aware that they won't ship until after January 5th. Thank you for a wonderful year and Happy Hogswatch from us all."

http://www.discworldemporium.com/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS: UPDATES AND REMINDERS

The Broken Drummers, "London's Premier Unofficially Official Discworld Group" (motto "Nil percussio est"), meets next on 30th November 1999 (-5874 days to go), according to their website, or more probably on Monday 4th January 2016 at the Monkey Puzzle, 30 Southwick Street, London, W2 1JQ. For more information, go to http://brokendrummers.org/ or email BrokenDrummers@gmail.com or nicholls.helen@yahoo.co.uk

*

Canberra, Australia's Discworld fan group is Drumknott's Irregulars: "We are a newly established Terry Pratchett & Discworld social group in Canberra called Drumknott's Irregulars. The group is open to all, people from interstate and overseas are welcome, and our events will not be heavily themed. Come along to dinner for a chat and good company. We welcome people all all fandoms (and none) and we would love to see you at one of our events, even if you're just passing through. Please contact us via Facebook (_https://www.facebook.com/groups/824987924250161/_) or Google Groups (_https://groups.google.com/forum/#!forum/drumknotts-irregulars_) or join us at our next event."

*

There is a new public Facebook meeting group, "The Gathering of the Loonies (Wincanton chapter)": "This group, by request of Jo in Bear will continue to be used for future unofficial (not run by the Emporium) fan Gatherings in Wincanton. Look here for information."

https://www.facebook.com/groups/373578522834654/

*

The Pratchett Partisans are a fan group who meet monthly at either Brisbane or Indooroopilly to "eat, drink and chat about all things Pratchett. We hold events such as Discworld dinners, games afternoons, Discworld photo scavenger hunts. Our recent 'Murder In Morpork' mystery party was a great night out. With 26 people attending, we had 24 suspects, our special guest – Vetinari, and one dead mime! It was a fun night of food and murder and we are planning another Murder in December so stay tuned. We also attend opening night at Brisbane Arts Theatre's Discworld plays." The Partisans currently have about 200 members who meet at least twice a month, usually in Brisbane.

For more info about their next meetup, join up at https://www.facebook.com/groups/pratchettpartisans/ or contact Ula directly at uwilmott@yahoo.com.au

*

The City of Small Gods is a group for fans in Adelaide and South Australia. For more information on their upcoming activities, go to www.cityofsmallgods.org.au

"Every few months, we have a full day's worth of board games at La Scala Cafe, 169 Unley Rd, Unley in the function room starting at 10am."

For more info, go to http://ausdwcon.org/fan-clubs/adelaide/quiz/

*

The Broken Vectis Drummers meet next on Thursday 7th January 2016 (probably) from 7.30pm at The Castle pub in Newport, Isle of Wight. For more info and any queries, contact broken_vectis_drummers@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Wincanton Omnian Temperance Society (WOTS) next meets on Friday 1st or 8th January 2016 (probably) at Wincanton's famous Bear Inn from 7pm onwards. "Visitors and drop-ins are always welcome!"

*

The Northern Institute of the Ankh-Morpork and District Society of Flatalists, a Pratchett fangroup, has been meeting on a regular basis since 2005 but is now looking to take in some new blood (presumably not in the non-reformed Uberwald manner). The Flatalists normally meet at The Narrowboat Pub in Victoria Street, Skipton, North Yorkshire, to discuss "all things Pratchett" as well as having quizzes and raffles. Details of future meetings are posted on the Events section of the Discworld Stamps forum:

http://www.discworldstamps.co.uk/forum/

*

Sydney Drummers (formerly Drummers Downunder) meet next on Monday 4th January 2016 at 6.30pm (probably) in Sydney at 3 Wise Monkeys, 555 George Street, Sydney,2000. For more information, contact Sue (aka Granny Weatherwax): kenworthys@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Treacle Mining Corporation, formerly known as Perth Drummers, meets next on Monday 4th January 2016 (probably) from 5.30pm at Carpe Cafe, 526 Murray Street, Perth, Western Australia. For details follow Perth Drummers on Twitter @Perth_Drummers or join their Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/Perth.Drummers/ – or message Alexandra Ware directly at <alexandra.ware@gmail.com>

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

09) DISCWORLD CONVENTION NEWS

NADWCON IV!

Emily Whitten says:

  "NADWCon is BACK, Baby!

  "Yes, that's right, The North American Discworld Convention, previously held in 2009, 2011, and 2013, is coming back to an as-yet-unannounced North American location in 2017! And yes, I've ordered my con-runner's straitjacket, as I will be co-chairing the Con along with the Chair from the 2013 Con. (For those who are not aware, I also co-founded NADWCon from 2005-2009, Vice-Chaired the 2009 Con, and Chaired the 2011 Con. In other words, I know a bit about con-running.)

  "Despite knowing I'm probably going to lose a healthy dose of sanity before the end, I'm super excited to be helping to bring back this awesome Discworld Con for North American (and world-traveling!) fans. We took a break in 2015 (due in large part to Discworld creator Sir Terry Pratchett's declining health and sad passing in March) but even with Sir Terry gone, his creations and fans live on, and we will continue to celebrate that 'until the ripples they cause in the world die away.'

  "For further convention news, please stay tuned to the new NADWCon website, and check out our first press release there..."

http://www.comicmix.com/2015/12/01/emily-s-whitten-nadwcon-is-back-baby/

Further information will be available at http://nadwcon2017.org

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10) ROUNDWORLD TALES: HO, THE MEGAPODE!

A fascinating item sent in by Wossname's "Mrs Cake":

Editor's note: language sissies be warned – this article is liberally salted with, well, salty words:

  "There are plenty of things in our world that share, completely or partially, the common name of the Meleagris birds. A venomous marine fish. Soy-based meat alternatives. West Asian countries. All these, of course, are Meleagris-style 'turkeys' in name only. There are even a handful of other species of bird that are, confusingly, referred to as 'turkeys' despite not being particularly close relatives of the gobble-gobble/hand tracing variety so familiar to North Americans. One of these not-turkeys resides on the opposite side of the Pacific from Meleagris, and in the Southern Hemisphere. The animal I'm referring to is the Australian brush-turkey (Alectura lathami). With its beefy, bowling ball shape, alert and fanned out tail feathers, and naked head and neck…both saturated with colors that look like the end result of receiving a swirly in a vat of liquefied candy corn…the brush-turkey seems damn deserving of its fowl moniker... Australian brush-turkeys, growing to as much as two and a half feet long, are the largest living members of the megapode family (Megapodiidae). Megapodes, so named for their typically thick, powerful legs and large feet, are a somewhat primitive fork of the 'ground fowl' clan. Megapodes and true turkeys are both members of the ground fowl order (Galliformes), but hail from very different evolutionary lineages within that larger umbrella of relatedness. Megapodes are restricted to Australasia, with much of their biodiversity scattered through Australia, New Guinea, and many of the islands in the eastern section of the Indo-Australian Archipelago. While the Australian brush-turkey isn't domesticated or ritually consumed by Ozzies like Meleagris is in the States, there are unique aspects of the biology of this megapode on the antipode that are worth sharing... perhaps the most interesting thing about Australian brush-turkeys is how they bring little brush-turkeys into the world. They, like all megapodes, have highly divergent reproductive practices..."

http://sydkab.com/2015/11/26/australias-turkey/

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11) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

French Discworld illustrator Marc Simonetti's delightful take on Death as the Hogfather holding court in Crumley's: http://bit.ly/1O7PEDM

A spot-on Nanny Ogg, from the Attic Players' production of Wyrd Sisters this month:
http://bit.ly/1OyYfCH

With Britain's first-ever International Space Station crewmember – Tim Peake – now in space, it's a good time to revisit the crew of the Kite, as imagined by Paul Kidby in The Last Hero:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CWQphiWW4AAnUgp.jpg

Artist Bruce Brenneise's poignant tribute to Sir Pterry. Scroll on the right for accompanying text: https://www.artstation.com/artwork/JEO6n

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

12) CLOSE

  And that's the lot for 2015. We'll be back in late January, I hope. Wishing you all a very happy Year of the Sneezing Panda, aka 2016!

– Annie Mac

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The End. If you have any questions or requests, write: wossname-owner (at) pearwood (dot) info

Copyright (c) 2015 by Wossname for the Klatchian Foreign Legion

Wossname
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
December 2014 (Volume 17, Issue 12, Post 1)

********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a free publication offering news, reviews, and all the other stuff-that-fits pertaining to the works and activities of Sir Terry Pratchett. Originally founded by the late, great Joe Schaumburger for members of the worldwide Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North American Discworld Society and other continental groups, Wossname is now for Discworld and Pratchett fans everywhere in Roundworld.
********************************************************************

Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
News Editor: Vera P
Newshounds: Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow, Wolfiekins
Staff Writers: Asti, Pitt the Elder, Evil Steven Dread, Mrs Wynn-Jones
Staff Technomancers: Jason Parlevliet, Archchancellor Neil, DJ Helpful
Book Reviews: Annie Mac, Drusilla D'Afanguin, Your Name Here
Puzzle Editor: Tiff (still out there somewhere)
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
Emergency Staff: Steven D'Aprano, Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare time)

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

INDEX:

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH
02) EDITOR'S LETTER
03) GOOD OMENS RADIO PLAY UPDATES
04) ODDS AND SODS
05) ACTION REPLAYS: DISCWORLD CAROLS, PTERRY'S CARNEGIE MEDAL SPEECH
06) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS
07) DISCWORLD ARTS AND CRAFTS NEWS
08) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
09) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH

"We hereby decree that 2015 on Roundworld shall be the 'Year of the Spinning Mouse' on Discworld. Hurrah! Hurrah! Huzzah!"

– Sir Pterry makes it official

"We are proud to confirm that the myriad of charitable efforts at Hogswatch 2014 raised a whopping £3,506 for RICE! – heartfelt thanks to all who opened their wallets, entertained, or made wonderful things to sell for this great cause."

– The Discworld Emporium

"This book is dedicated to Sir Terry Pratchett OBE who has stood like a wossname upon the rocky shores of our imaginations – the better to guide us safely into harbour."

– Ben Aaronovitch's dedication at the front of Foxglove Summer, his newest Rivers of London novel

"Books aren't just commodities; the profit motive is often in conflict with the aims of art. We live in capitalism, its power seems inescapable – but then, so did the divine right of kings. Any human power can be resisted and changed by human beings. Resistance and change often begin in art."

– Ursula Le Guin on the occasion of accepting a National Book Award, November 2014

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR

You better not shout, you better not cry... yes, that season is upon us again, the time when some people gather with their loved ones to eat, drink, make merry and exchange lovingly-chosen gifts, while nearly everyone else gathers with their not-really-liked-very-much ones to gorge inadvisably, drink to excess, exchange heated accusations and attempt to raise a sickly smile when unwrapping yet another unwanted pair of woolly socks from Aunt Euthropia... ah well, it will soon be the Year of the Spinning Mouse and the worst will be over...

Remember GlenBricker's Discworld Lego campaign, which has been gradually getting closer to the required figure of 10,000 requests to qualify as an official Lego set? Well, with 130 days left, that figure has almost been reached – less then 1,000 supporters to go now, at 9,007 and counting! If you're a Lego fan, or just looking to raise the Discworld profile yet further, do join in to support of the project. For more information and updates, go to https://ideas.lego.com/projects/36302 and have a look at what Discworld creations are on offer.

It's satisfying to see that Hogfather is now showing up around the world in "what to read/watch at Christmas" recommendations – as is A Slip of the Keyboard. And also gratifying to see an increasing amount Discworld-specific holiday cards and decorations. We in the Wossname editorial household are still slowly doling out our treasured Paul Kidby greeting cards, but the new one from the Discworld Emporium look well worthy of stocking up on – see item 7.1 below.

Speaking of Discworld-themed excellence, here's some Department of Awesome Wall Coverings news: fancy the entirety of The Colour of Magic as a poster? Yes, every word! Spineless Classics specialise in turning entire books into large one-sheet posters, with the added attraction of some of the text being arranged in the form of a relevant illustration – in this case, The Luggage (with trail of footprints) and Great A'Tuin. The text is small (4pt) but readable! See item 7.2 below.

Finally, we all know Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett have collaborated a few times, but according to this blurb from a site called Bidness, it's more unequal than that: "Tweets by famous authors like Amanda Palmer ('The Art of Asking') and former astronaut Chris Hadfield ('You are Here'), and The Onion Magazine's 'The Iconic Covers That Transformed an Undeserving World' will include the buy button. Moreover, readers buying Ms. Palmer's book will get a manuscript note from her and her husband Neil Gaiman, author of 'Terry Pratchett.'"

And now, on with the show!

– Annie Mac, Editor

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) GOOD OMENS RADIO PLAY NEWS

Here comes the Apocalypse – or at least, the almost-Apocalypse. The hotly anticipated BBC radio adaptation of Good Omens is almost upon us!

Good Omens will be aired in six parts. Here be the broadcast schedule:

Monday 22nd December: Episodes 1 and 2, back to back, starting at 11pm
Tuesday 23rd December: Episode 3, starting at 11.30pm
Thursday 25th December: Episode 4, starting at ii.30pm
Friday 26th December: Episode 5, starting at 11.27pm (that's what the BBC official site says!)
Saturday 27th December: Episode 6, starting at the "matinee time" of at 2.30pm

http://www.bbc.co.uk/goodomens

To hold you until Monday night, here be some official illustrations by Sean Phillips. Here are Peter Serafinowicz as Crowley and Mark Heap as Aziraphale:

http://bit.ly/1yx2eoE

...and here we have Charlotte Ritchie as Anathema Device and Colin Morgan as Newton Pulsifer:

http://bit.ly/1vFVUhB

(source: Bleeding Cool News)

...and from the Radio Times, a selection of teaser-soundbites introducing the characters. I have to say that the music sounds marvellous, and so does Peter Serafinowicz:

http://bit.ly/1vwuOV6

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04) ODDS AND SODS

4.1 DRAGONS AT CRUMBLING CASTLE CHRISTMAS STORY

"Have you ever wondered what Father Christmas gets up to the other 364 days of the year? Well wonder no more, as Sir Terry exposes all in his short story Father Christmas Goes to Work at The Zoo which you can read for free for a limited time here, taken from the fantastically funny collection of stories, Dragons at Crumbling Castle."

To read a fully illustrated version of this story on the web, go to http://bit.ly/12zmL34

To download, go to http://penguin-group.msgfocus.com/c/1cWK4OrAAoQgnInw1Sf76VW

4.2 THE TWELVE DISCWORLD COOKIES OF CHRISTMAS

Anne Hoppe, famed editor and sometime Discworld convention Guest of Honour, has been baking and decorating some rather special "Hogswatch cookies". And here they are!

Twelve Nac Mac Feegles:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4Rdz2OCcAApK8i.jpg

Eleven werewolves howling:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4Re6UbIYAAzlQt.jpg

Ten Tiff'ny Snowflakes:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4RgTlnIEAAVDiz.jpg

Nine learn-ed rodents:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4RhyObIgAEXNzG.jpg

Eight hatted wizards***:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4RicYJIgAA_RsG.jpg

Seven unharmed hedgehogs:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4RjvU-IQAIqpjL.jpg

Six "ships" a-fleecing:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4RlT5lIQAAdIvL.jpg

Hogfathers, five:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4RmBsaIIAAXYjM.jpg

Four Elephants:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4Rnn7RIUAE7kol.jpg

Three Wyrd Hags:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4RobplIQAA6xFf.jpg

Two Hippos, proud:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4RqXHiIYAASv3-.jpg

...and A'Tuin swimming in a starred "sea":
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4Rq6HOIYAAqmyq.jpg

Also, a bonus Great God Om:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B4RugHKIgAAb5dX.jpg

*** including Eskarina Smith

And on the subject of Ms Hoppe, here's an unearthed gem – Anne Hoppe at the Boston Athenaeum in 2009, reading Sir Pterry's remarks on the occasion of his being awarded the 2009 Boston Globe-Horn Book Award for Fiction for Nation (he was pre-booked for Unseen Academicals events elsewhere at the time). You will have seen these words elsewhere, but here they are read aloud with the care and attention of someone who edited the book itself:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wX3fBDxiiu4

4.3 HOGSWATCH IN WINCANTON 2014: A PRESS REPORT

In the Western Gazette:

"With the flag of Ankh-Morpork flying from the town hall throughout the weekend residents could be forgiven for thinking they had stepped into another world, especially with the colourful array of characters to be seen strolling the streets of Wincanton. But it was all in good spirits as hundreds of fans of Terry Pratchett’s Discworld novels arrived for the annual festive knees-up. Beginning on Friday with a performance by Wincanton’s very own Harry Pursey the weekend featured a packed programme of events... Entertainment continued into the night with the Pink Pussycat Club Cabaret compered by 2013 Vice World Champion Whiskerina Muriel Lavender. She said: 'The level of talent never ceases to delight me, because the people who come here just abound with energy and fun.' Sir Terry was unable to attend but The Hat took pride of place throughout... Bernard Pearson revealed there would be no Spring Fling next year as the team would be busy with the publication of two new books. But he added: 'From what I understand this has been one of the most well-attended shows we have ever done. I say we; I sit in a shed and smoke a foul pipe, while Isobel sits at our dining room table with a pile of paperwork, an abacus and a large glass of brandy. But the person who has made all of this happen is our wonderful Reb Voyce. She has run herself ragged. I could not be more proud of her if she was my own daughter..."

http://bit.ly/1zIEAd8

4.4 STORY MUSEUM INTERVIEW

"I am William Brown, better known as 'Just William'. And 'It's not fair.' He always says things like 'It's not fair,' or 'It stands to reason.' I chose him because his author was one of the best authors there ever has been for children. That was Richmal Crompton. A woman, though lots of people thought she was a man. Why Just William? I like his style. He never gave up, for one thing. He wouldn't back off if he thought he was right. Also, he had a lot of fun. He seemed to smash someone's window every week and it would be the slipper. And that seemed to have no effect on him whatsoever. And the way he spoke, and the way he reasoned; I recognised it as a way of speaking and reasoning that was not necessarily mine. The lady who wrote him was an absolute genius.

To listen, or to download, the full Story Museum interview with Sir Pterry, go to

http://bit.ly/1quuISz

and scroll down to the box marked "Q&A with Cambridge Jones".

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

05) ACTION REPLAYS: HOGSWATCH CAROLS, CARNEGIE MEDAL ACCEPTANCE SPEECH

4.1 WEIRD ALICE'S HOGSWATCH CAROLS

Weird Alice Lancrevic has been off on her Grand Sneer for some time now, but in her absence, we offer a repost of some of her most (in)famous Hogswatch carols...

A FAIRYTALE OF OLD ANKH

A PRISONER IN THE PALACE DUNGEONS:
It was Hogswatch Eve, mate
Down in old Ankh
A chained mime said to me
"Won't learn another word!"
And then he sang a song:
The hedgehog's point of view
I turned twice Widdershins
And dream'd of hot stoo

Got Raven's lucky beak –
See, Death of Rats says SQUEAK
A slate is running
In Biers for me and you
So Happy Hogswatch
From Dots and Sadie
Making Morpork free of crime
And nightmares all come true...

TWOFLOWER:
They've got gnolls big as trolls
They've got wizards in robes
But the smell goes right through you
There's no rest for your nose
When we walked round the Shades
On that cold Hogswatch night
You promised me Ankh-Morpork vampires don't bite

VARIOUS MEMBERS OF THE BEGGARS' AND THIEVES' GUILDS:
"You were Bursar – "
"You were jolly..."
"You stank like Queen Molly!"
When the minstrels stopped playing
We set them alight
Piss Harry's "collecting"
Mossy Lawn, he's dissecting
We ate Dibbler's meat pies
And retched through the night

ALL:
The boys from the YMPA Choir
Were singing sourly
And Dark Morris bells rang out
For Hogswatch Eve.

NOBBY AND COLON:
"You're a Fool, a nut-case!"
"You're a civic disgrace,
"Swigging Bearhugger's booze
"Till you hoick on your shoes!"
"You Lancre sheep-shagger..."
"You unlicensed Beggar!"
"Happy Hogswatch, you Nobbs -- "
"Hope the Gods shut yer gob!"

ALL:
The cops of the Day and Night Watch Choir
Committed harmony
And Dark Morris bells rang out
For Hogswatch Eve.

DUKE FELMET: "I could've ruled the Disc..."
DUCHESS FELMET: "Well, so could any twit!
"You took my crown from me
"When ghosts unmanned you..."
DUKE: "I killed for Lancre, dear
"I grabbed it for our own..."
DUCHESS: 'I'd rather stand alone!"
ALL LANCRE TOGETHER: "But we could never stand you!"

ALL:
The ghouls from the Bel-Shamharoth Choir
Were howling tunelessly
And Dark Morris bells rang out
For Hogswatch Eve!

WE THREE HAGS: ANE HOGSWATCHE CAROL

NANNY, GRANNY AND MAGRAT:
We three Hags Lancrastian are
Straddling brooms, we travel afar
Hearth and privy, pub and smithy
Casting our spells bizarre
Ohh...
Stars of Lancre, stern in black
Dames in regal pointy hats
Hubwards breezing, nethers freezing
Witches three who've got the knack

VERENCE:
Born a Fool, yet destined to reign
Never cruel though sometimes a pain
King well-meaning – New Age-leaning
Sensible, in the main
Ohh...
Star of Lancre, staunch and meek
Castle sanitation geek
Bells a-clinking, forward-thinking
Modernise your farm techniques

MAGRAT:
Frank but senseless, soppy am I
Wrinkled gowns and head in the sky
Sweet tomfool'ry, occult jewellery
"Wet as a hen," they sigh
Ohh...
Star of Lancre, star-crossed Queen
Star of herbal research scene
Keen defender, nappy-mender
Keeping Ynci's armour clean

NANNY:
Scumble mine, 'tis boozy perfume
Breath like fire can clear a big room
Girlish in spirit, bawling lyrics
Bawdy and rude – boom-boom!
Ohh...
Star of Lancre, super-Gran
Head of matriarchal clan
Crude and chummy, Greebo's Mummy
Who can fix things? Nanny can!

GRANNY:
Hogswatch parties? Sausages fat?
Ha! I can't be having with that!
Bees I'll borrow near and far, so
I can patrol my patch

ALL: Ohh...
Stars of Lancre, wyrd and wise
We've no need to advertise
Maiden, mother, and the... other
Guarding all 'neath Lancre's skies

NOT KING WENCESLAS

Doctor Mossy Lawn looked out
On his Igors merry
Tossing body parts about
(It's herrydeterry)
Jason stoked the forge so bright
Helped by Nanny's daughters
For his yearly task tonight -
Shoeing Tusker's trottt-ters.
Good King Verence donned his bells
And with jingles gentle
Spread organic Hogswatch smells
(Quite experimental)
Sybil served the party fare
With her fav'rite dragon
No fine wines on offer there –
Sam is on the waaaa-gon!

DECK THE HALLS...

Deck the halls with boughs of holllly
Buggrit, buggrit, ook, a pint of eels
Bow to ev'ry wizard's folly
Buggrit, buggrit, ook, *our* one has wheels
Fill to bursting ev'ry belly
Bugg'rem, bugg'rem, what duck?, wheeee!
Winkle pie for Mr Jelly,
Buggrit, buggrit, ook, the first one's free.
Deck the Libr'ry with bananas
Buggrit, buggrit, ook, cough cough, cough cough
For tonight the Watch won't ban us
Buggrit, buggrit, ook, the wheels fell off
Toast we now our figgins tender
Bugg'rem, bugg'rem, what duck?, wheeee!
Arrgh! The Bursar's on a bender!
Buggrit, buggrit, eek! – some Dried Frog tea?

HOGFATHER IS COMING TO TOWN

You better not shout, you better not cry
You better watch out, I'm telling you why:
Susan Sto Helit has a great big poker and she's gonna
bash all the monsters under your – I'm sorry, I'll
start that again...
She's making a list, she's checking it twice
She's gonna find out who's naughty or nice,
Susan Sto Helit has a great big poker and she's gonna
get that bogeyman hiding behind the – oh dear, this
isn't working very well, is it? Pardon me, there's a cowled
rat tugging at my skirt. Erm, Happy Hogswatch.
She knows when you are sleeping, she knows if you're awake
She knows if you've been bad or good because she's the
granddaughter of Death, after all, and Death sees the fall
of every sparrow and – aaah, forget it.

HOGSWATCH IS A-COMING

Hogswatch is a-coming, the Dean is very fat
Please to put a figgin in his pointy hat!

Hogswatch is a-coming, Lord Downey's wearing black
Please to put some poison in the old man's sack!

Hogswatch is a-coming and Death is on the prowl
Please to put two coppers in his deep, dark cowl!

Hogswatch is a-coming and Cohen has a sword
Please to give him rubies or you might get gored!

Hogswatch is a-coming and Dibbler's in his coat
Please to buy a sausage or he'll cut his throat!

Reality is wavering, all Ponder's team are wrecks
So please, please, put a figgin in the UU Hex!

...and not quite a carol, but seasonal, first published in 2007:

HOGGERWATCHY

Twas Hogswatch, and the savvy youths
Did slyly grin as sleep they feigned
All tinselled were the icy roofs
And the Hogfather reigned

'Beware the pig-shaped choccy buns!
'The drunken fights, the booze'd collapse!
'Beware the lemon curd, and shun
'Voluminous brandy-snaps!'

We took our chunder-cures in hand
Pork rinds and sausage pie we bought
Then rested we as the clock struck three
And had a wily thought

And as we hid, with prying eyes
The Hogfather (with list of names)
Came jingling through the wintry skies
HO. HO. HO. as he came!

One-two, one-two! The ham's sliced through!
Its charcoaled skin was bright as chrome
We played Charades, then thanked the Gods
And went galumphing home

'And hast thou drained the scumble-pot?
'Don't be alarmed, my wee pished bairn!'
O scabrous daze, me head's all glazed!
We mortals never learn...

Twas Hogswatch, and the savvy youths
Did slyly grin as sleep they feigned
All tinselled were the icy roofs
And the Hogfather reigned.

4.2 PTERRY'S CARNEGIE MEDAL SPEECH

On the occasion of winning the Carnegie Medal for The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents in 2001:

"I'm pretty sure that the publicists for this award would be quite happy if I said something controversial, but it seems to me that giving me the Carnegie medal is controversial enough. This was my third attempt. Well, I say my third attempt, but in fact I just sat there in ignorance and someone else attempted it on my behalf, somewhat to my initial dismay.

"The Amazing Maurice is a fantasy book. Of course, everyone knows that fantasy is 'all about' wizards, but by now, I hope, everyone with any intelligence knows that, er, what everyone knows...is wrong. Fantasy is more than wizards. For instance, this book is about rats that are intelligent. But it also about the even more fantastic idea that humans are capable of intelligence as well. Far more beguiling than the idea that evil can be destroyed by throwing a piece of expensive jewellery into a volcano is the possibility that evil can be defused by talking. The fantasy of justice is more interesting that the fantasy of fairies, and more truly fantastic. In the book the rats go to war, which is, I hope, gripping. But then they make peace, which is astonishing.

"In any case, genre is just a flavouring. It's not the whole meal. Don't get confused by the scenery. A novel set in Tombstone, Arizona, on October 26, 1881 is what– a Western? The scenery says so, the clothes say so, but the story does not automatically become a Western. Why let a few cactuses tell you what to think? It might be a counterfactual, or a historical novel, or a searing literary indictment of something or other, or a horror novel, or even, perhaps, a romance – although the young lovers would have to speak up a bit and possibly even hide under the table, because the gunfight at the OK corral was going on at the time.

"We categorize too much on the basis of unreliable assumption. A literary novel written by Brian Aldiss must be science fiction, because he is a known science fiction writer; a science fiction novel by Margaret Atwood is literature because she is a literary novelist. Recent Discworld books have spun on such concerns as the nature of belief, politics and even of journalistic freedom, but put in one lousy dragon and they call you a fantasy writer.

"This is not, on the whole, a complaint. But as I have said, it seems to me that dragons are not really the pure quill of fantasy, when properly done. Real fantasy is that a man with a printing press might defy an entire government because of some half-formed belief that there may be such a thing as the truth. Anyway, fantasy needs no defence now. As a genre it has become quire respectable in recent years. At least, it can demonstrably make lots and lots and lots of money, which passes for respectable these days. When you can by a plastic Gandalf with kung-fu grip and rocket launcher, you know fantasy has broken through.

"But I'm a humorous writer too, and humour is a real problem. It was interesting to see how Maurice was reviewed here and in the US. Over there, where I've only recently made much of an impression, the reviews tended to be quite serious and detailed with, as Maurice himself would have put it, 'long words, like "corrugated iron"' Over here, while being very nice, they tended towards the 'another wacky, zany book by comic author Terry Pratchett'. In fact Maurice has no wack and very little zane. It's quite a serious book. Only the scenery is funny.

"The problem is that we think the opposite of funny is serious. It is not. In fact, as G K Chesterton pointed out, the opposite of funny is not funny, and the opposite of serious is not serious. Benny Hill was funny and not serious; Rory Bremner is funny and serious; most politicians are serious but, unfortunately, not funny. Humour has its uses. Laughter can get through the keyhole while seriousness is still hammering on the door. New ideas can ride in on the back of a joke, old ideas can be given an added edge.

"Which reminds me... Chesterton is not read much these days, and his style and approach belong to another time and, now, can irritate. You have to read in a slightly different language. And then, just when the 'ho, good landlord, a pint of your finest English ale!' style gets you down, you run across a gem, cogently expressed. He famously defended fairy stories against those who said they told children that there were monsters; children already know that there are monsters, he said, and fairy stories teach them that monsters can be killed. We now know that the monsters may not simply have scales and sleep under a mountain. They may be in our own heads. In Maurice, the rats have to confront them all: real monsters, some of whom have many legs, some merely have two, but some, perhaps the worse, are the ones they invent. The rats are intelligent. They're the first rats in the world to be afraid of the dark, and they people the shadows with imaginary monsters. An act of extreme significance to them is the lighting of a flame.

"People have already asked me if I had the current international situation in mind when I wrote the book. The answer is no. I wouldn't insult even rats by turning them into handy metaphors. It's just unfortunate that the current international situation is pretty much the same old dull, stupid international situation, in a world obsessed by the monsters it has made up, dragons that are hard to kill. We look around and see foreign policies that are little more than the taking of revenge for the revenge that was taken in revenge for the revenge last time. It's a path that leads only downwards, and still the world flocks along it. It makes you want to spit. The dinosaurs were thick as concrete, but they survived for one hundred and fifty million years and it took a damn great asteroid to knock them out. I find myself wonder wondering now if intelligence comes with its own built-in asteroid.

"Of course, as the aforesaid writer of humorous fantasy I'm obsessed by wacky, zany ideas. One is that rats might talk. But sometimes I'm even capable of weirder, more ridiculous ideas, such the possibility of a happy ending. Sometimes, when I'm really, really wacky and on a fresh dose of zany, I'm just capable of entertaining the fantastic idea that, in certain circumstances, Homo Sapiens might actually be capable of thinking. It must be worth a go, since we've tried everything else.

"Writing for children is harder than writing for adults, if you're doing it right. What I thought was going to be a funny story about a cat organizing a swindle based on the Pied Piper legend turned out to be a major project, in which I was aided and encouraged and given hope by Philippa Dickinson and Sue Coates at Doubleday or whatever they're calling themselves this week, and Anne Hoppe of HarperCollins in New York, who waylaid me in an alley in Manhattan and insisted on publishing the book and even promised to protect me from that most feared of creatures, the American copy editor.

"And I must thank you, the judges, in the hope that your sanity and critical faculties may speedily be returned to you. And finally, my thanks to the rest of you, the loose agglomeration of editors and teachers and librarians that I usually refer to, mostly with a smile, as the dirndl mafia. You keep the flame alive."

www.carnegiegreenaway.org.uk/pressdesk/press.php?release=pres_terspeach.htm

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

06) DISCWORLD MEETING GROUPS NEWS

The Broken Drummers, "London's Premier Unofficially Official Discworld Group" (motto "Nil percussio est"), meets on the first Monday of every month at the Monkey Puzzle, 30 Southwick Street, London W2 1JQ: "We welcome anyone and everyone who enjoys Sir Terry's works, or quite likes them or wants to find out more. We have had many visitors from overseas who have enjoyed themselves and made new friends. The discussions do not only concern the works of Sir Terry Pratchett but wander and meander through other genres and authors and also leaping to TV and Film production. We also find time for a quiz. The prize is superb. The chance to set the quiz the following month."

Next meeting: apparently on 30th November 1999 ("-5497 days to go", their website says), from 7pm onwards. Could it be that they Drummers have gone Trollish? If not, the next meeting is likely to be on Monday 5th January 2015...

The Drummers' December meet report:

"It was great to see so many of you at the Christmas/ 10th Anniversary celebration on Monday. In the end 29 people turned up. That's not quite the record (which is 33) but it's in second place. I was pleased that we had a significant number of the original members, including James O., who came up with the name "Broken Drummers" and who travelled a long way to be there. We also had three new people: Philip, who we recruited at Hogswatch, and Tara and Charlotte who we had not met before but turned out to be veteran Feegle impersonators. Plus, of course, loads more people who have joined over the course of the last 10 years. I did a quiz on Christmas songs, which Tim W. and Ruth won. Tim has agreed to do a quiz for next time as he says it will be good for him. How or why I'm not sure but keep it in mind when we do the quiz. Tim W. then kindly made a speech, which was a relief as I was flagging after shouting the quiz answers at 29 of you whilst trying to keep Bill quiet! Tim observed that I have been running Drummers for most of its 10 year history. I've had a great time doing that. Coming to Drummers was a huge turning point in my life. I even met my husband at a Drummers meeting. Therefore I'll repeat what I said Monday night. I didn't found Drummers, I started coming in March 2005 and took over running it in August 2006. The person who got the whole thing up and running in the latter half of 2004 was Jack. Since he wasn't there Monday I'll say a big thanks to Jack now. Thank you also to the rest of you for coming along and making Drummers what it is (whatever that may be)."

For more information, go to http://brokendrummers.org/ or email BrokenDrummers@gmail.com or nicholls.helen@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Pratchett Partisans are a new fan group who meet monthly at either Brisbane or Indooroopilly to "eat, drink and chat about all things Pratchett". Forthcoming events include:

Saturday, January 10, 2015 2:00 PM Discworld Discussion #1 – Punes & Parodies

For more info about their next meetup, go to www.meetup.com/Pratchett-Partisans/ or contact Ula directly at uwilmott@yahoo.com.au

*

The City of Small Gods is a group for fans in Adelaide and South Australia: "We have regular monthly dinner and games nights, longer games days, plus play outings, craft-y workshops, and fun social activities throughout the year. For more info and to join our mailing list, visit http://cityofsmallgods.org.au "

*

The Broken Vectis Drummers meet on the first Thursday of every month from 7.30pm at The Castle pub in Newport, Isle of Wight.

Next meeting: if not New Year's Day, then Thursday 8th December 2015, probably, but do email to check.

All new members and curious passersby are very welcome! For more info and any queries, contact broken_vectis_drummers@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Wincanton Omnian Temperance Society (WOTS) meets on the first Friday of every month at Wincanton's famous Bear Inn from 7pm onwards. "Visitors and drop-ins are always welcome!"

Next meeting: Friday 2nd January 2015 (probably).

*

The Northern Institute of the Ankh-Morpork and District Society of Flatalists, a Pratchett fangroup, has been meeting on a regular basis since 2005 but is now looking to take in some new blood (presumably not in the non-reformed Uberwald manner). The Flatalists normally meet at The Narrowboat Pub in Victoria Street, Skipton, North Yorkshire, to discuss "all things Pratchett" as well as having quizzes and raffles.

Details of future meetings are posted on the Events section of the Discworld Stamps forum:

http://www.discworldstamps.co.uk/forum/

*

Sydney Drummers (formerly Drummers Downunder) meet on the first Monday of every month in Sydney at 3 Wise Monkeys, 555 George Street, Sydney,2000.

Next meeting: Monday 1st December 2014 at 6.30pm (probably). For more information, contact Sue (aka Granny Weatherwax): kenworthys@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Treacle Mining Corporation, formerly known as Perth Drummers, meet on the first Monday of the month (subject to holidays) at the child-friendly Carpe Cafe, 526 Murray Street, Perth, Western Australia.

Next meeting: from 5.30pm on Monday 5th January 2015 (probably).

For details follow Perth Drummers on Twitter @Perth_Drummers and Facebook https://www.facebook.com/groups/Perth.Drummers/ – otherwise message Alexandra Ware directly at <alexandra.ware@gmail.com>

*

Western Drummers, also based in Sydney, meet at The Rowers, Nepean Rowing Club, Bruce Neal Drive, Penrith at 6.30-7.30pm for food, 7.30pm for games, quizzes and chat: "If you have never been, please come on down. You would be very welcome. We eat, have a drink, talk Discworld and play board games. Starts kind of 6 – 6.30ish and finishes kind of 9pm ish."

Next meeting: as there was a meeting last week, the next will probably be in mid-January. For more information, contact Nanny Ogg – lewis_oz@bigpond.com – or visit their Facebook page:

https://www.facebook.com/westerndrummers

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

07) DISCWORLD ARTS AND CRAFTS NEWS

7.1 DISCWORLD EMPORIUM UPDATES

"New for Hogswatch – latest Discworld gifts & goodies!

"The City Watch Recruit File contains all the certification and ephemera to confirm your enrolment in the Watch and help you uphold the law on the mean streets of Ankh-Morpork - a great gift for any City Watch fan! Includes your Warrant Card, Appraisal, and Training Certificate, along with three Traffic Division Fixed Penalty Notices for you to deploy amongst your friends and relatives, and three forensic evidence stickers - ideal for laying claim to anything you might like to investigate, plus a prisoner receipt for when you have no choice but to take a wrong 'un into custody."

The City Watch Recruit File is priced at £10.00. For more info, and to order, go to:
http://www.discworldemporium.com/City%20Watch%20File

"What Hogswatch would be complete without the presence of Quoth, Death, and the Grim Squeaker? Add a little Pratchett magic to your tree or abode with a set of gorgeous lasercut birch wood decorations. Each set includes one of each design

The Discworld Decorations set is priced at £10.00. For more info, and to order (a bit late for this year, but plenty of time to order for next Hogswatch), go to:
http://www.discworldemporium.com/Discworld%20Decorations

"We've collaborated with Joe McLaren, cover artist for the Discworld Collector’s Library Editions from Gollancz, to create a view of Sator Square entitled 'Fairytale of Ankh-Morpork'. Joe's distinctive illustration, complete with wizards, beggars, dwarfs, trolls, the Hogfather in his sleigh, and snow swirling around the Tower of Art graces our exclusive Hogswatch cards... Joe has used his distinctive style to create a festive view of Sator Square, complete with wizards, beggars, dwarfs, trolls, the Hogfather in his sleigh, snow swirling around the Tower of Art and candlelit carols – a real Hogswatch treat! Printed on textured art paper, these gorgeous cards can be used as notelets or as framed art prints – perfect gifts or greetings this Hogswatch! Each pack comprises of 3 cards, which are accompanied by 3 kraft ribbed envelopes, and they measure 150 x150mm."

The Fairytale of Ankh-Morpork cards collection is priced at £7.50. For more info, and to order (again, too late for this year, but plenty of time to order for next Hogswatch), go to:
http://bit.ly/1C12Rxf

Also – "Fairytale of Ankh-Morpork has been cleverly designed to incorporate four separate tableaus forming this year's Hogswatch issues from the A-M.P.O. – Available to collect as a limited edition minisheet (_http://bit.ly/1C11qPh_, priced at £5.00) or adorning our 250 illustrated First Day Covers (_http://bit.ly/1r1zvLb_, price £10.00). Be good (the Hogfather is watching)"

And a final Hogswatch message from Team Cunning Artificer:

"We'll be having a little time off over Hogswatch to put our feet up, scoff mince pies and polish our baubles. Please note that we will cease shipping from DECEMBER 18TH, and any orders placed after this date WILL NOT BE SENT until we re-open on JANUARY 5TH. We've now passed all shipping deadlines except for UK orders, so we'd like to remind everyone that we cannot guarantee your goodies will arrive in time for the big day if ordered AFTER the dates shown below.

"The last issue from Discworld Stamps for the Year of the Reciprocating Llama is here - The Hogswatch Season LBE is a festive assortment of Discworld stamps, with a chance of sports and rarities. Each LBE in this edition contains at least one of this year's exquisite Hogswatch issues from the Ankh-Morpork Post Office, illustrated by Joe McLaren, along with a FREE winter edition of one of our most iconic stamps, the 50p Cabbage Field - an exclusive Hogswatch gift from us!
A VERY generous flurry of sports of the Winter Cabbage Field, and from all our current issues has been scattered throughout the edition – happy Hogswatch from the A-M.P.O! (_http://www.discworldemporium.com/hogswatch-season-lbe_, price £5.00)

"And finally, we'd like to extend heartfelt gratitude to YOU, our brilliant customers old and new for your continued custom and support over the past year. We're looking forward to sharing our forthcoming Discworld projects with you, and to celebrating our mutual geekery at conventions across the globe. May the Year of the Spinning Mouse bring you joy, happiness, and lots of Discworld merchandise!"

7.2 COLOUR OF MAGIC WALL POSTER

Most of us have bookshelves lining our wall. How about an entire book as a poster? Spineless Classics are offering just that:

"First published in 1983, this is the book which introduced Terry Pratchett and the Discworld to the reading public, starting a series of forty novels so far and making Sir Terry the UK's bestselling author of the 1990s. Now for the very first time fans can enjoy this iconic debut novel in its entirety on one page. This design is a single sheet measuring 700 x 1000mm (279/16 in x 393/8 in). All Spineless Classics are printed on heavyweight paper in sharp, lightfast ink which will not fade."

The Colour of Magic poster is priced at £39.99 unframed and £240.00 framed. To find out more about Spineless Classics, and to find out how to order your poster, go to:

www.spinelessclassics.com/the-colour-of-magic-fantasy-book-print-197.htm

USA customers can go to http://www.spinelessclassics.net/ ... In Fourecks, the site is /www.spinelessclassics.com.au/
and in South Africa, www.spinelessclassics.co.za/

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

08) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

Man in Hat meets Leather-clad Barbarian:
http://bit.ly/1s0sipM

From Hogswatch in Wincanton 2014, some fabulous iconographs! Here is Captain Angua and her most recent "collar", a mime:
http://bit.ly/1ygyu4l

...and a truly awesome troll, complete with lovingly tended lichen:
http://bit.ly/1yQUkKv

...and Pterry the Puppet:
http://bit.ly/1ygAARK

...and Dios of Djelibeybi, accompanied by, perhaps, a Dark Clerk or other female Assassin:
http://bit.ly/1rYdyaY

...and a fantastic Hogswatch cake, topped by Death of Rats himself:
http://bit.ly/1ymnYr7

...and that's *Emperor* Cohen to you, peasant!
http://bit.ly/1yP8gno

...and here is an extensive photoset from the festivities, by participant Sara Long:
http://on.fb.me/1ygAbP4

It's the Glooper! AKA the 1949 model Monetary National Income Analogue Computer ("MONIAC"), which ran on water:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B37AzizIUAA0bVo.jpg:large

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

09) CLOSE

And so we come to the end of another year. For me, it will always be the year that WOSSNAME became Wossname, and I raise my scumble glass to our late great founder Joe Schaumburger, who created this newsletter way back in the days when fanzines were printed on actual pieces of dead tree, circulated via physical post, and people could write titles all in uppercase without having to fear they would be misfiled in recipients' spam folders. I also raise a toast to our various contributors and Roving Reporters, and most of all to you, O Readers, for sticking with us through the years. Cheers! Prosit! Slainte! Millennium hand and shrimp!

According to the Sydney Morning Herald this week, "Terry Pratchett apparently never really forgave J. K. Rowling for replacing him as Britain's top-selling author". Er... the other one's got bells on... but at least they recommended Dragons at Crumbling Castle as a "delightful young adult collection"...

If there is any late breaking news, we'll pass it along. otherwise, we'll see you in January. Have a lovely holiday season and here's to the new year!

– Annie Mac

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The End. If you have any questions or requests, write: wossname-owner (at) pearwood (dot) info

WOSSNAME
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
December 2013 (Volume 16, Issue 12, Post 1)
********************************************************************
WOSSNAME is a free publication for members of the worldwide
Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North
American Discworld Society and other continental groups. Are you a
member? Yes, if you sent in your name, country and e-mail address.
Are there any dues? No! As a member of the Klatchian Foreign Legion,
you'd only forget them...
********************************************************************
Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
News Editor: Fiona (not Bruce) Bruce
Newshounds: Vera, Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow
Staff Writers: Asti, Alison Not Weatherwax, Steven D'Aprano, LC Wynn-Jones
Convention Reporters: Mithtrethth Hania Ogg et al
Staff Technomancer: Jason Parlevliet
Book Reviews: Drusilla D'Afanguin
Puzzle Editor: Tiff
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
DW Horoscope: Lady Anaemia Asterisk, Fernando Magnifico, Kevin
Emergency Staff: Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare time)

Copyright 2013 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

INDEX:

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH
02) LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
03) RAISING STEAM: REVIEWED BY CORY DOCTOROW
04) RAISING STEAM: OTHER REVIEWS
05) ODDS AND SODS DEPARTMENT
06) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS
07) DISCWORLD ARTS AND CRAFTS NEWS
08) DISCWORLD CONVENTION NEWS
09) DISCWORLD GROUPS MEETING NEWS
10) AROUND THE BLOGOSPHERE
11) ACTION REPLAY: WEIRD ALICE'S SEASONAL CAROLS
12) ROUNDWORLD TALES: HEROES OF STEAM
13) IMAGES OF THE MONTH
14) CLOSE

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

01) QUOTES OF THE MONTH

'It is at the level of the sentence that Pratchett wins his fans.'

– Andrew McKie, reviewing Raising Steam in The Times

'It worries me that I might be a poster boy for dementia, because I make it look good.'

– Sir Pterry, interviewed by Charlie Stayt, BBC, December 2013

'Lord Vetinari is that wonderful thing: a sensible ruler — that's why he's so popular. Everyone grumbles about him, but no one wants to chance what it would be like if he wasn't there. I like Vetinari. I don't mind authority, but not authoritarian authority. After all, the bus driver is allowed to be the boss of the bus. But if he's bad at driving, he's not going to be a bus driver anymore.'

– and interviewed by Cory Doctorow, November 2013

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

02) A LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR

Happy 30th birthday, Discworld! On 24th November 1983, The Colour of Magic was first published, and the world of wordcraft and bedtime reading has been a better place ever since. I have no idea how many, if any, of us – including the author himself – imagined back in the mid-'80s that Discworld would become a series, an icon, and a multimillion-selling publishing phenomenon, but surely we are all thankful and grateful that it did. And that it looks set to continue for generations.

Terry Pratchett has created narratives and characters – most of all, characters! – that not only will live on and on in that hallowed pantheon of fiction's "immortals", from Darcy and Heathcliff to Sherlock Holmes to Prince Elric, Doctor Moreau, Cthulhu and, yes, a certain artful Dodger – but that have also influenced real lives in very real ways and served as inspirations, lifestyle pointers, even savers of lives (I know personally of a couple of cases, there). Also, who else could have made Death cuddly, eh?

So raise your glasses, especially if they are filled with a wee dram of scumble or Special Sheep Liniment, in praise of Discworld. Long may it reign! Long may it continue! Ooook ook oook and crivens!

*

It's official! 2014 will be known as The Year of the Reciprocating Llama on the Discworld. So sayeth the Master!

[...which gives me to think: since this is not the only known reciprocating Discworld animal, isn't it time to lobby Paul Kidby or Stephen Player (or both, or...) to give the world a Discworld bestiary? Perhaps with text by Sir Pterry and Jacqueline Simpson? I'd certainly buy one! – Ed.]

*

...and here be an iconograph of Sir Pterry, looking very dapper in his velvet jacket and coachman's hat, standing outside London's famous Groucho Club with some friend of his called, er, I think it's Neil something. Possibly some kind of writer? Apparently they weren't discussing the telly version of Good Omens, no, not at all...

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BbNt5KFIEAAYNgp.jpg

And now, on with the show!

– Annie Mac, Editor

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

03) RAISING STEAM: REVIEWED BY CORY DOCTOROW

Some extracts:

"Longstanding Pratchett fans know that the series started off with a light (even slight), silly tone – one that deepened, book by book, into something altogether more serious. Raising Steam has a lot more of the feel of that early Pratchett, with some very silly wordplay (the Marquis of Aix en Pains!) and a serious quantity of funny/silly footnotes. Even the dwarfish names tilt more towards Snow White jokes than references to Icelandic lore. But as the synopsis above implies, this is also one of the darkest of the Pratchett novels, a thoughtful and often graphically violent story about modernity, terrorism, and technology's discontents...

"Pratchett's dallied with the theme of technology as a force superior to mysticism and magic before (see, for example, Pyramids), but never with such a keen enthusiasm. Paradoxically, Pratchett gives technology a kind of mystical spirit – his railroad is a kind of living god (a kind of positive version of the "gonne" in Men at Arms or the films in Moving Pictures) that ensnares the imaginations of the people who behold it, driving them to spread it far and wide. And unlike the previous anthropomorphized technologies of Discworld, the railroad is a great liberator, a greater magic than that of the wizards...

"Most of the Discworld novels stand alone, but not this one. From the intertextual references (Dick Simnel is the son of Ned Simnel, a minor but crucial character in Reaper Man) to the complex relationship between Commander Vimes and the dwarfs (not to mention the military mystery of Koom Valley, presented in Thud), this is a book that practically requires you to have read all 39 of the previous volumes before you can get to grips with it. But it's worth it. This is a surprisingly layered and sneaky sort of book..."

To read the full review, go to:

http://boingboing.net/2013/11/27/pratchetts-raising-steam.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

04) RAISING STEAM REVIEWS

Reviewed in The Guardian, by fellow bestselling author Ben Aaronovitch:

"The series started as a satirical journey through the conventions of the fantasy genre. It painted its world in broad outline and great splashes of colour, although, from the first, the novels demonstrated Pratchett's eye for telling detail and the absurdities of the human condition. As the series progressed, a strange thing occurred – the Discworld, created as a setting for humorous stories, began to take on a certain solidity, as if it were striving to become a real place... Thirty years on, the Discworld has grown so solid and so weighty that any new novel has to exert a great deal of narrative power just to get that world moving at a decent pace. So it's just as well that the latest book concerns the arrival of the Discworld's very own steam locomotive... The genius of Pratchett is that he never goes for the straight allegory... Pratchett's themes are the big ones: the threat and promise of change, the individual's search for meaning within their own society, and the fine moral judgments that have to be made between competing rights and freedoms..."

http://tinyurl.com/o825b9p

*

Reviewed by Rene Nol in the Otago Times:

"It's all aboard (and mind the gap please) as the traditionally horse-powered Discworld is introduced to the age of steam in the form of Iron Girder, the Disc's first locomotive. And wealthy Harry King (aka the King of the Golden River – don't ask why!) looks set to become its first railway baron as he bankrolls the infant enterprise... Pratchett's latest offering rattles along, navigating the bends and gradients nicely under his sure touch, as the plot thickens and the pace quickens..."

http://www.odt.co.nz/entertainment/books/283510/pratchett-amuses

*

...and the rest of that Andrew McKie review in The Times:

"There are sly nods to the history of railways and a cheeky reference to The Railway Children. Most aficionados, however, will be on the look-out for in-jokes and references from previous novels — of which there is no shortage. There are supporting roles for Sam Vimes and other members of the Watch, and some surprising developments amongst the dwarfs, who initially have a Luddite objection. Raising Steam is certainly less pacy than the earliest books, and its diversions on social history, the threat of new technology to traditional industries, and even terrorism and sabotage, can be fairly dark. But Discworld's success, like that of Wodehouse's Jeeves and Wooster stories, has never been driven by the plots, no matter how laboriously worked out. It is at the level of the sentence that Pratchett wins his fans. There are fewer truly tremendous verbal pyrotechnics in Raising Steam than in others in the series. Some of the humour is rather laboured but Pratchett fans will find plenty to like as well. And the closing words of the book suggest more to come."

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

05) ODDS AND SODS DEPARTMENT

Happy Hogswatchdays at the Discworld Emporium:

"Two weeks on from our Hogswatch festivities and we've hardly drawn breath; with orders still pouring in from all o'er the world. Hogfather's little helpers are hard at work to get your Discworld goodies packed and posted, and UK customers still have until the 18th to order before the big day. However, while we are still accepting and shipping orders worldwide we now cannot guarantee delivery in time for the 25th for orders placed after the dates shown in the banner below. Please note that we'll be taking some time off to slurp sherry and gobble mince pies in front of the telly box and will therefore close and cease shipping from December 20th – orders placed after that date won't be dispatched until we reopen on January 6th. We welcomed an unprecedented number of visitors to Hogswatch 2013, with many having travelled from distant lands to celebrate 30 years of Discworld in the company of one Sir Terry Pratchett. Various events over the weekend, including our Grand Charity Auction, raised a whopping £3924.53 for our sponsored charity RICE (Research Institute for the Care of the Elderly) and a further £633 for King Arthurs School Library appeal. Our heartfelt thanks to those who donated items, emptied their wallets for good causes, and helped to make Hogswatch such a magical event."

From the Western Gazette:

"Bernard Pearson, partner of the Discworld Emporium, which has organised the annual Hogswatch event for the past 12 years, said that so many Discworld fans turned up for the celebration that 'there literally was no more room to be had in any inn, hotel or guest-house'. He said: 'The event was a resounding success and the largest by far in the 12 years the Emporium has been holding them.' Fans came to meet Sir Terry Pratchett from Australia, America, Germany, Iceland, Italy, France, Finland, Ireland, and Sweden as well as from all over the UK. Mr Pearson added: 'Not only was this event a celebration of Christmas – well Hogswatch to Discworld readers – but also it marked 30 years of Discworld books being published. With more than 85 million books being sold worldwide and millions of fans and readers enjoying them it was a celebration indeed.'...Mr Pearson added: "A spokesman for Sir Terry told us he had enjoyed himself hugely and once again was so impressed in the way that Wincanton offers such friendship and hospitality to his fans.'"

http://tinyurl.com/m5wsm25

*

Watch out! The Fools Guild's about! As reported in The Guardian, under the headline of "Norfolk police warn of alarming clown epidemic":

A police force has told members of the public to ignore people dressed as clowns if they meet them in the street. Norfolk police received a report from a member of the public alarmed by a clown sighting in Gaywood, near King's Lynn, on Tuesday evening. The suspect was described as wearing a 'full clown outfit' with a red suit and red hair. The following evening the force received a similar report after two clowns were spotted near a skate park in the town. These people wore 'Halloween-type' clown masks. In both cases, the callers reported being alarmed and being chased a short way up the road. It follows recent reports of the circus characters scaring people in Northampton. Superintendent Carl Edwards said no one had been injured or assaulted. He added that it seemed whoever was behind the makeup was probably trying to shock people and it was best not to give them the attention. Officers would patrol areas where the reports had been made and, if they found any clowns, they would 'offer them strong words of advice', he said..."

http://tinyurl.com/qy7s778

*

Now that's what I call a book crossing! In Metro News:

"A Good Samaritan has returned a Terry Pratchett book to a Sutton library dock after discovering it languishing 6,000 miles away in Mauritius. The library in the town of Cheam now wants to thank the unknown altruist after the novel was returned to the book shelf in the train station with a note saying it had been found abroad. The book, The Fifth Elephant, had been classed as 'lost' for roughly five years before it suddenly reappeared and library staff are astonished. Hannah Bell, from Cheam Library, told the Sutton Guardian: 'They really are a good Samaritan. I don't think it showed up on our system but just showed up as "lost" as it was gone for such a long time. Nothing like this has happened before.'..."

http://tinyurl.com/kunb3ef

*

In The Guardian, a young reader's review of Dodger:

"I hadn't read any of Terry Pratchett's books before, but when my granddad bought this book for me for Christmas I got straight into it. From the front cover I was intrigued, about the look of murder in his eyes and the look of mystery of it, from the clothing that he was wearing to the razor or knife in his dirty left hand, and the brown scruffy matted dog showing its ribs leaning next to him... It's a 335 page book that is brilliantly written with awesome wordplay. However unfortunately for you younger ones I recommend this to 11+ as it has quite a bit of swearing and violence..."

http://tinyurl.com/kvwctdb

*

A thoughtful review of Jingo and how it mirrors Roundworld, by Chan Akya in the Asia Times:

"Many years ago, when I first read Jingo, there was some incident in the Indian ocean where a small island had appeared from the depths and caused some debate as to which country was the real owner of the wretched place – (as I remember, it disappeared in the next seismic event). That debate had nothing to do with natural boundaries of countries and everything to do with the 200-mile exclusive economic zone covering the islands. That's one reason a lot of people have this fascination with what are often little more than rocky outcrops. The main plot device of Jingo is an island that suddenly appears exactly in the middle of the water body between the two main fictional countries of Discworld – Klatch and Ankh- Morpork. Whilst the Klatchians, described as "secretive and primitive" are a bit keen to start a war to claim the island, the rulers of the wealthier trading oriented city-state of Ankh-Morpork are less keen on outright hostilities as they believe it is easier to sell stuff to living people than to dead soldiers. With that description it become obvious that we have a similar, farcical situation in Asia with the events in the islands called Diaoyudao/ Diaoyutai/ Senkaku by the main claimants – China, Taiwan and Japan... Reading the commentaries – be it the Wall Street Journal or the Financial Times, not to mention the more jingoistic publications from China, Japan and Taiwan – one is struck by the sheer sense of farce underpinning the whole situation... Even the inestimable Pratchett couldn't have concocted what passes for reality in Asia today, but if he did try he might have written Jingo with four main characters and a couple of others purely for (further) comic relief: a. An aging economic superpower that is somehow trying to cling on to its regional relevance even though, quite literally, it has no standing armed forces; b. A brash upstart who, going through a painful adolescent adjustment period, has decided to risk all by challenging the aforementioned aging economic superpower; c. Lastly, a spoilt brat which was previously owned by the aging economic superpower and is currently independent but sees its future as part of the new brash upstart, probably intending to bring these wretched islands as its dowry to the wedding; d. The world's only superpower has borrowed so much money from all three players above than it can never repay even one of them; it is currently distracted by the absence of a functioning government and unable to complete simple tasks like putting together a website; e. Asia's third- and fourth-largest economies, utterly confused by the proceedings without an inkling of whether they should even say anything let alone do something. This has the making of a grand comedy, an opera even..."

http://www.atimes.com/atimes/China/CHIN-01-031213.html

*

A review of Steeleye Span's Wintersmith concert in Bradford. Uncredited, in the Bradford Telegraph and Argus:

"Led, as ever, by the soaring voice of Maddy Prior, the band appeared fresher than ever playing new material from their collaboration with Sir Terry Pratchett and his Wintersmith novel. And it was scintillating stuff, with supreme musicianship, terrific changes of pace within the folk rock genre and totally mesmerising. The first half ended with a rocking number, Dance The Dark Morris, which featured black-faced Morris dancers accompanying the band. And after the break, more Wintersmith material which has definitely given the band new impetus, and showcasing all the amazing dexterity of all five band members with decades of experience behind them..."

http://tinyurl.com/lh7z6kr

*

From Michael Quinion's marvellous World Wide Words, some information about Catoptromancy that Lily Weatherwax probably knew:

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall. Who is the fairest of them all?' At some time or other, almost anything you can think of has been used to foretell the future, from straws on a red-hot iron to disembowelled chickens. But the mirror, that most strange thing that allows not only reflection but self-reflection, has always been special. Hence catoptromancy, the art of divination by means of mirrors. As a result there are many superstitions about mirrors — such that they must be covered or removed after a death to prevent the soul of the dead person from being stolen. In part it also explains why it is considered bad luck to break one (until modern times, they were also rare, so breaking one really was bad luck). There are records from many ancient civilisations of mirrors being used for magic..."

http://tinyurl.com/mnwnf4t

*

Igor technology comes to Roundworld:

"Xiao Wei lost his right hand in an accident at work but could not have it reattached to his arm right away. Instead, the hand was kept alive by stitching it to Mr Wei's left ankle and "borrowing" a blood supply from arteries in the leg. A month later, surgeons were able to remove the hand and replant it back on his arm..."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-25405543

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06) PTERRY AND ALZHEIMER'S NEWS

Sir Pterry's fight to raise Alzheimer's awareness and stimulate the research field continues. Here is a live BBC interview (embedded on the page):

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-25324655

From The Times Sunday edition (sadly, behind a paywall):

"Sir Terry Pratchett, the bestselling author who is suffering from dementia, has accused David Cameron of failing in his pledge to tackle the crisis caused by the disease. In an article for The Sunday Times the acclaimed author of the Discworld series, who was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2007, says he fears the prime minister's promise to improve life for dementia patients and fund research into drugs to treat the condition may prove to be no more than a 'podium promise for the press'. 'David Cameron made a solemn pledge one year ago,' he writes. 'In what I hoped wouldn't simply be a podium promise for the press, he announced intentions to double money spent on dementia research and to tackle the 'crisis' the condition is causing..."

www.thesundaytimes.co.uk/sto/news/uk_news/People/article1347247.ece

More about the "dementia summit", from BBC News:

"Dementia is heading towards being the biggest health and care problem of a generation so you'd think it would have the funding to match. Yet it really is the poor relation of other diseases. In the UK, about £590m is spent on cancer research with £267m coming from government. At the moment £52m of government money goes to dementia research. It's a pattern reflected around the world... David Cameron called on governments, industry and charities all to commit more funding. He said the G8 should make this the day 'the global fight- back really started'. He said the UK Government would boost annual research funding from £66m, the 2015 pledge, to £132m, which will be adjusted for inflation, by 2025. Mr Cameron told the summit: "This disease steals lives, wrecks families and breaks hearts. If we are to beat dementia, we must also work globally, with nations, business and scientists from all over the world working together as we did with cancer, and with HIV and Aids. This is going to be a bigger and bigger issue, the key is to keep pushing...'"

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-25318194

In the Bath Chronicle:

"A Bath charity, which specialises in helping people with dementia, is to be part of a new £4 million research project... The Research Institute for the Care of Older People (RICE), based at the Royal United Hospital, will work with experts at Bangor University, Cardiff University, Brunel University, the London School of Economics, King's College London, Sussex University, the Alzheimer's Society and Innovations in Dementia CIC. The Improving the experience of Dementia and Enhancing Active life: Living well with dementia project, known as IDEAL, will investigate how social and psychological factors affect people living with dementia. Director of RICE, Professor Roy Jones, said: 'We have been committed to improving life for people with dementia and their families for more than 25 years. We are delighted to be part of the IDEAL project team that will try and understand how people cope with dementia and its effects and how best everyone can help people affected by dementia to live as well as possible.' At the moment, around an eighth of the sum spent on cancer research in the UK goes on investigating treatment for dementia... Author Sir Terry Pratchett, who was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2008 and has been treated at the RICE research charity in Bath, told the BBC's Newsnight programme 'a lot more' money should be spent on dementia research and care. Sir Terry, who worked as a journalist in Bath, told Jeremy Paxman dementia research was a Cinderella issue. 'I have been saying for a long time, it doesn't get noticed. It does need a lot more money put in. It needs more people trying to see what they can do.' Alzheimer's Society chief executive Jeremy Hughes said: 'Given that this is the first time a prime minister has used the presidency of the G8 to take action on a single disease, we are expecting a rallying cry from the UK government. 'Yet the details we have seen so far are not enough...'"

http://tinyurl.com/okqo55c

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07) DISCWORLD ARTS AND CRAFTS NEWS

The Cunning Artificer has something special to mark the occasion of Discworld's 30th birthday:

"To celebrate 30 years of Discworld, the Emporium's Bernard Pearson has dusted off his sculpting tools, and flexed his creative muscle to create a special objet d'art to mark the occasion. The Piece pays tribute to The Colour of Magic and is available in an ivory finish, and as a brass finish in a limited edition of 300. The '30 year sculpt' will be made to order in the new year on a first-come first- served basis, so to register your interest, and reserve any edition number of the limited brass version please email isobel@discworldemporium.com"

To preview this very lovely 189mm square x 84mm deep piece, with multiple iconographs:

http://tinyurl.com/l36ydzm

"Two editions of this special piece will be available to own: an antique brass finish of which a limited edition of only 300 will be produced, and an unlimited version in an attractive Ivory effect. Each limited edition brass version will be numbered and accompanied by a certificate of authenticity, while the reverse of both editons will be adorned with a short missive about the piece from Bernard himself... If [you] wish to own the limited edition brass finish please remember to include any edition number that you would like us to reserve and we will do our very best to oblige. Each piece is produced in high quality cold cast resin and features an integrated hook for wall hanging, but can also be displayed freestanding. The cost of these will be in the region of £75 for the Ivory Edition and £90 for the Antique Brass finish."

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O8) DISCWORLD CONVENTION NEWS

Siobhan Greaney's report on the recent Irish Discworld Convention:

"Yep, I fully admit to being a nerd. But not all of the people I meet at Discworld Conventions are. Despite the connotation the 'convention' label can give, it's a very casual environment for fans and non-fans alike. Attendees come from all age ranges, all walks of life, and all levels of nerdiness. Friends and family who are 'dragged' along by enthusiastic fans always comment on how much fun they have, how welcoming everyone is, and how they don't feel left out by not necessarily having read the books. Yes, some people have an encyclopaedic knowledge of the books, but most read the books years previously and would quake at the idea of joining a quiz. This year I encouraged my housemate, who has read a total of one Discworld book, to tag along. He had a blast, made new friends, and is keen to come again. Most people at the end of a Convention weekend have a new set of contacts to meet up with at the next one. As Discworld is so full of sarcasm, parody and puns, if you're a fan you generally share a sense of humour with the rest of the fans. And sharing a laugh is a great way to cement a friendship. So to those who have read the books but don't think they're 'nerdy' enough for a convention, I share this nugget of wisdom that was given to me before my first one, and which I have found true over the years: Going to a Discworld event isn't like spending time with a bunch of strangers; it's meeting friends you just hadn't met yet..."

http://tinyurl.com/laprbnv

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09) DISCWORLD GROUPS MEETING NEWS

The Pratchett Partisans are a new fan group who meet monthly at either Brisbane or Indooroopilly to "eat, drink and chat about all things Pratchett". For more info about their next meetup, go to

http://www.meetup.com/Pratchett-Partisans/

or contact Ula directly at uwilmott@yahoo.com.au

*

The City of Small Gods is a group for fans in Adelaide and South Australia.

"We have regular monthly dinner and games nights, longer games days, plus play outings, craft-y workshops, and fun social activities throughout the year. For more info and to join our mailing list, visit:

http://cityofsmallgods.org.au

*

The Broken Vectis Drummers meet on the first Thursday of every month from 7.30pm at The Castle pub in Newport, Isle of Wight. The next meeting will probably be on Thursday 2nd January 2014, but do email (see below) to check. All new members and curious passersby are very welcome! For more info and any queries, contact:

broken_vectis_drummers@yahoo.co.uk

*

The Wincanton Omnian Temperance Society (WOTS) meets on the first Friday of every month at the famous Bear Inn from 7pm onwards. Visitors and drop-ins are always welcome! The next WOTS meeting will (probably) be on Friday 3rd December 2014.

*

The next meeting of the Broken Drummers, " London's Premier Unofficially Official Discworld Group", will be from 7pm on Monday 6th January 2014 at the Monkey Puzzle, 30 Southwick Street, London W2 1JQ. Note the new web address:

http://brokendrummers.org/

For more information email BrokenDrummers@gmail.com or nicholls.helen@yahoo.co.uk

The Broken Drummers December 2013 meet report:

"We had a delayed Christmas dinner on the second Monday (to avoid a clash with the Hogswatch event). It was great to see so many people there. We had a visit from Mandy (aka Periwinkle) from Wincanton. There was much discussion of the recent Hogswatch event in Wincanton and next year's Wadfest which Tim W. will be fronting (alongside the eponymous Waddy) and in which I will be running the murder mystery for the first time. Otherwise, there was much eating, drinking and merriment. Jax did a quiz, however I have no idea what it was on or who won as we went home before it took place."

*

The Northern Institute of the Ankh-Morpork and District Society of Flatalists, a Pratchett fangroup, have been meeting on a regular basis since 2005 but is now looking to take in some new blood (presumably not in the non-reformed Uberwald manner). The Flatalists normally meet at The Narrowboat Pub in Victoria Street, Skipton, N Yorks, to discuss "all things Pratchett" as well as having quizzes and raffles.

Details of future meetings are posted on the Events section of the Discworld Stamps forum:

http://www.discworldstamps.co.uk/forum/

*

Drummers Downunder meet on the first Monday of every month in Sydney at Maloneys, corner of Pitt & Goulburn Streets, at 6.30pm. The next meeting will (probably) be on Monday 6th January 2014. For more information, contact Sue (aka Granny Weatherwax):

kenworthys@yahoo.co.uk

*

Perth Drummers meet on the traditional date of first Monday of the month. The next meeting should be on Monday 6th January 2014. "Please note we have moved to San Churro this month from 5.30pm (San Churro, 132 James Street, Northbridge, Perth, WA)."

For details follow Twitter @Perth_Drummers and Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/Perth.Drummers/

or message Krystel directly at khewett@live.com

*

There's a new Pratchett meeting group in Fourecks, known as Western Drummers. That's two for the Sydney Pratchett fans now! The Western Drummers intend to meet on the third Monday of every month at The Rowers, Bruce Neal Drive, Penrith at 6.30-7.30pm for food, 7.30pm for games, quizzes and chat. For more information, contact Nanny Ogg – lewis_oz@bigpond.com – or visit their Facebook page:

https://www.facebook.com/westerndrummers

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10) AROUND THE BLOGOSPHERE

Blogger Random Alex offers an interesting sociopolitical analysis of Snuff. He also loves it:

"I've had to think carefully about the way Pratchett portrays the goblins. One of the crescendo moments is a goblin, Tears of the Mushroom, playing the harp for a huge crowd in Ankh-Morpork. That is, a member of a subjected race, wearing 'civilised' clothes, goes to the heart of civilisation and plays an instrument that is coded as approaching the zenith of musical accomplishment, and there impresses the (civilised) bigwigs. This could all be seen as uncomfortably close to recreating the classic idea of the western civilising mission... Except that the goblins have already been shown, very clearly, to have their own culture and don't need 'civilising'. They have a rich language, evidenced clearly by their names (Tears of the Mushroom!); they make art (some of which is so precious that humans who regard the goblins as little better than animals will steal it); they care for one another and about justice. They are wretches in that they are wretched – through no fault of their own. And Tears of the Mushroom plays her own composition, and is in no way dismayed by the audience before her. By the time Tears of the Mushroom plays, the reader should be so convinced about the sentience and sapience of the goblins that any of the characters doubting it should cause serious eye-rolling. Many of the human characters are also convinced early on, which is also intended to convince the audience, just in case you missed all of the other very obvious signs. Thus what Pratchett is doing is showing, to some extent, an example of the old westernising/civilising mission – there's no doubt that's what Miss Beadle is doing, whatever her intentions – and then not entirely sending it up, but certainly undermining it, and definitely showing that is is quite unnecessary for the sake of the goblins themselves. Although maybe it's necessary for the acknowledged-as- civilised, to make them realise what they are doing to this race..."

http://randomalex.net/2013/12/03/snuff/

Blogger Nadine was thoroughly delighted with Men at Arms:

"I'm always most interested in characters. Worldbuilding is great, and plot is of course necessary to keep me interested, but the characters make or break a book for me. I already loved Vimes but Carrot seemed like too much of a goody-goody. He gets a lot of depth in this book, while still being the purest human being I could dream up. Reading about comic relief characters like Cuddy and the inimitable Detritus (who learns to count in the funniest way you can imagine), and especially Angua, was exactly the breath of fresh air the Watch books needed. Angua's story in particular appealed to me, not only because she's a woman (although that's great), but because she is torn between her two states of being. She is a practical woman who gets annoyed about always being naked when changing back into human form. But she also has a lot to offer as a Watchman. Having a keen sense of smell is the obvious contribution but, much to my amusement, she can also talk to dogs such as Gaspode. That little guy kept showing up and remarking on the affairs of humans and sniggered his way straight into my heart. Plot-wise, this is a police procedural, complete with interrogating suspects, writing up police reports and figuring out whodunnit. The reports in question made me laugh so hard, I may have snorted a bit. Just warning you… don't read this in public..."

http://tinyurl.com/kv8dnba

...and also with Feet of Clay:

"As has been the case with the other City Watch novels, I was less intrigued with the murders and the crime-solving, and more with all the other stuff that goes on in Discworld's capital city. This novel did some interesting things and, in the process, granted the characters an additional layer of credibility. As much as we love Carrot, for example, he is quite surprised and makes some truly idiotic remarks when he finds out one of the new Watch members (a dwarf) is female... it was just lovely to see other sides of these characters. Especially Carrot, who was too good to be true anyway. It's nice to see him blunder and just blurt out whatever comes to mind. But once his mistakes are pointed out, he goes back to being a Protector Of The People – including undead, unalive, and females. Having fallen in love with the Discworld through the Tiffany Aching novels, I couldn't help but grin when Wee Mad Arthur showed up in Feet of Clay. As a professional rat-catcher, no less. Although he is called a gnome, we all know he is a sort of Nac Mac Feegle. And, if you ask me, any book is automatically better if it has Feegles in it..."

http://tinyurl.com/kpk3ahl

...as was blogger Gabriella Gricius:

"I think I shall always love reading a good Terry Pratchett novel, and Feet of Clay was no exception. Classic quick-witted prose that had be struggling desperately to keep up with all of the event passing by – I will always love his novels. There's something just so perfect about an Assassin's Guild who operates quite legally in the city Ankh Morpork. Now that I've finished the novel, I can absolutely agree that the cover is entirely appropriate – and I encourage other readers of humorous fantasy novels to try it out. Character-wise, there is no one better to run the crime division in Ankh Morpork (who does not like Clues, no sir), than Vimes. He is a continuing character throughout many of Pratchett's other novels, but he plays his role here spectacularly – being every inch the grumpy but excitable Commander that we all know he is. When it comes to plot, Feet of Clay was one of those unique novels that had me guessing until the end..."

http://tinyurl.com/n5rhhfc

Blogger DWJ Jones gives the Raising Steam audiobook 9 out of 10 points:

"As with most of Pratchetts work its hard to go into too much detail without giving away the plot, but suffice to say it is a fast paced well oiled machine powering through the Satirical landscape. As with most it can be read as a standalone novel but I would implore you to read the first 39 novels first, or if you don't have time at least Going Postal and Making Money which introduce us to Moist. As mentioned this version reviewed is an audiobook read by Stephen Briggs. Once again he brings the characters of the Discworld to life. Recently I have found my ability to sit a read a book severely curtailed in the form of a bouncing baby boy. I have however found myself listening to Audiobooks with increasing frequency. The Discworld novels are some of the best and that is in no small part to Briggs' talent..."

dwjjones.wordpress.com/2013/12/09/raising-steam-terry-pratchett

...and blogger Nordie lauds the print version:

"With so many previously established characters making an appearance, it's certain that some favourites will not get the exposure that some people want. It could be seen as perhaps too- crowded with characters, and could one or more of them have been dropped without anyone noticing? I dont know. Anyway, story covers change, factionism, new technology, religious doctrine, feminism, being true to ones self, bigotry, racisim, in such a way to still make it enjoyable to read. Plus plenty of footnotes. Whilst we still have him, Pratchett's at least working at his best..."

http://tinyurl.com/l7fjuyn

Blogger easyondeyes is back with a rave review of Night Watch:

"I loved this Terry Pratchett for so many reasons! Not least, because I'm a huge fan of Sam Vimes and Vetinari and in this book we get to see a different side of both. While Vimes shows up as this canny cop with some serious hero skills, we get to see Vetinari in his pre-patrician days when he was still a young Assassin at the guild. Though, that's not to say he was not creepily omniscient and brilliant. If you like your Night Watch books you can't miss this one..."

http://easyondeyes.wordpress.com/2013/12/06/night-watch/

Blogger And the Geek Shall Inherit's review of Raising Steam:

"So, is Raising Steam a fitting conclusion of an always wonderful series or does it leave you wanting - nay hoping - for yet another final hurrah? Well, yes & yes really. As a contained story within a 30 year legacy, it satisfies that things can end most happy but it still leaves chances for progress -either by Sir Terry or by (Om & other gods forbid!) another suitable author (though Sir Terry himself said that will most likely be his own daughter Rhianna, who is a writer in her own right). Whilst the novel certainly ends, leaving the plot nicely bundled, the narrative world, much like the Great A'Tuin itself, can continue ever onward. Either on page or in our own unfettered imaginations. Yet, what of the story itself? I have to say, as a long term reader, it is an interesting beast to say the least... Raising Steam deals with some very heavy issues concern views of modern fundamentalism -especially in light of such events of the British soldier- but it casts all such extremists, no matter what they are extreme about, as being forces that should be removed from society but also understood so such acts never happen again. Ideas of how such people can strives & recruit others to their causes underlie all the dwarf vignettes but the book also shows the positives of people of all racists, former enemies & untrusted minorities, can work together once you get passed ingrained prejudices. Raising Steam is carrying on many themes & plots points that were started in the previous Discworld novel Snuff, with the goblins now coming into society & showing people their true value. This theme does overshadow many of the other plot points but its still handled deftly..."

http://tinyurl.com/mxbkcg3

...and another review of it, by blogger Lit Chic:

"It's no surprise I loved this book. As usual, Pratchett's wit makes this an enjoyable read. I'm impressed with how he takes such an ordinary and seemingly uninteresting subject matter and spins an interesting story around it. The subtle humor in the writing as well as the laugh-out-loud moments kept me going even when the plot slowed down. Pratchett takes full advantage of his subject matter and characters, even to the point of over-kill. Not that I'm complaining..."

http://tinyurl.com/mabseyu

Blogger Miss Bibliophile's first Discworld experience was Small Gods, and she loved it:

"All in all, it completely engrossed me. It amazed me how cleverly Discworld was linked to our world, and I liked that in Discworld, people believe the world is a sphere, when it is in fact flat, whereas in our world we used to believe the opposite. Small Gods has some very dryly funny bits, but it remains much more meaningful than I had expected, raising to my mind the issue of corruptcy in religions and governments alike. This book has made me eager to read more of the Discworld novels, to find out if they are all so original, funny and meaningful. I think that Terry Pratchett has done what many writers are afraid to do, and written something so weird that it stands out amongst other books. It's quite inspiring, really, since it shows that it's alright to be a bit different every once in a while. I recommend this to anyone looking for something refreshingly different to read, or anyone interested in theories about gods, religion or politics..."

http://tinyurl.com/m8zrprl

Blogger therankspoon is back with a rave review of Wintersmith:

"While I have only been introduced to Ms. Aching through this book (her previous books being A Hat Full of Sky and I Shall Wear Midnight) I still enjoyed the hell out of this book. Terry Pratchett has that rare gift that most fantasy writers lack: He's able to write a book series that you can drop down right in the middle of and still be able to figure out what's what and who's who without having to consult Wikipedia. Suffice it to say, I didn't know who half these 'regular' characters were and I was still able to catch as catch can. An added bonus of this book (at least for people who are new to Sir Pratchett and who either don't like the mythology behind Discworld or else they just don't get it) is that there is very little Discworld geography included in this book at all. In the previous books of his that I have read, I have found it a bit hard to understand all of the places and turn's of phrases that he has created because they were originally brought up in other books of his that I haven't read yet. This isn't the case with The Wintersmith. Pratchett doesn't disappoint. If you are new or if you are a regular reader, do yourself a favor and go out and pick this up..."

http://tinyurl.com/mflzs2a

Blogger E G Cosh lauds Pratchett as a master of humour – and truth:

"The joy of reading Pratchett, is that he knows the world is a slick smiling conman built from the lies we tell ourselves and each other, that pile up into a lie so heavy that no-one can move it alone. He knows we all struggle to see, let alone change our own realities. Pratchett twitches back the curtain and shows us how ridiculous it is—shows us the greasy machinery of prejudice and ignorance behind the scenes and inside our own minds. We don't feel stupid for believing the lies. We're all in it together, he says. But we are left thinking that we'll spot it next time. Next time someone tries to trick you with your own fear, with ignorance or vanity or shame, you'll see it for the silliness it really is. You won't feel angry or afraid or any other emotion that provides fertile soil for lies to grow. You'll remember his stories and you'll laugh. The lies will shrivel. Leaving space for a breath, for a lifetime. That is his gift to us: a brief respite. A moment's freedom for us to figure out what we want our own truths to be."

gcosh.com/2013/11/22/the-joy-and-pain-of-pratchett/

Blogger Bibliophilic Boy revels in Equal Rites:

"So I decided to start off my summer of books with an author that has yet to let me down. He's witty, He's fun, He's fantastical: The amazing Terry Pratchett! Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating a little, but after a long year of academic reading Pratchett really was like a window cracked open in a dusty old library (Run by a Orang-outang that was once human, but has decided that feet that can grip really are quite an asset to a librarian). And Equal Rites really turned out to be one of his best gems... The novel is fully of witty one-liners, that had strangers looking at me like I was mad every time I would suddenly just guffaw at a particularly funny sentence. It's really just a bit of fun and you don't need to have read any of Pratchett's other books to enjoy it. The plot seemed strangely un-linked in some places, and some of the scenes just seem so random. But Pratchett succeeds in creating a fantasy world that is easy to get into, and rich characters that are difficult not to like..."

http://tinyurl.com/ks9jspj

Blogger Jeannette Porter is back with a shortish reflection on the *things* of Discworld (not to be confused with the ones from the Dungeon Dimensions):

"Part of creator Terry Pratchett's genius is that the Discworld is so richly textured that some of the signature objects are practically living characters. That the objects have readily recognizable Roundworld counterparts just lets the reader in on the joke..."

http://tinyurl.com/l5nat8k

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11) ACTION REPLAY: WEIRD ALICE'S SEASONAL CAROLS

Some oldies but goodies from a few seasons ago...

11.1 WE THREE HAGS: ANE HOGSWATCHE CAROL

NANNY, GRANNY AND MAGRAT:
We three Hags Lancrastian are
Straddling brooms, we travel afar
Hearth and privy, pub and smithy
Casting our spells bizarre

Ohh...
Stars of Lancre, stern in black
Dames in regal pointy hats
Hubwards breezing, nethers freezing
Witches three who've got the knack

VERENCE:
Born a Fool, yet destined to reign
Never cruel though sometimes a pain
King well-meaning – New Age-leaning
Sensible, in the main

Ohh...
Star of Lancre, staunch and meek
Castle sanitation geek
Bells a-clinking, forward-thinking
Modernise your farm techniques

MAGRAT:
Frank but senseless, soppy am I
Wrinkled gowns and head in the sky
Sweet tomfool'ry, occult jewellery
"Wet as a hen," they sigh

Ohh...
Star of Lancre, star-crossed Queen
Star of herbal research scene
Keen defender, nappy-mender
Keeping Ynci's armour clean

NANNY:
Scumble mine, 'tis boozy perfume
Breath like fire can clear a big room
Girlish in spirit, bawling lyrics
Bawdy and rude – boom-boom!

Ohh...
Star of Lancre, super-Nan
Head of matriarchal clan
Crude and chummy, Greebo's Mummy
Who can fix things? Nanny can!

GRANNY:
Hogswatch parties? Sausages fat?
Ha! I can't be having with that!
Bees I'll borrow near and far, so
I can patrol my patch

ALL:
Ohh...
Stars of Lancre, wyrd and wise
We've no need to advertise
Maiden, mother, and the... other
Guarding all 'neath Lancre's skies

11.2 A FAIRYTALE OF OLD ANKH

(with apologies to the Pogues)

A PRISONER IN THE PALACE DUNGEONS:
It was Hogswatch Eve, mate
Down in old Ankh
A chained mime said to me
"Won't learn another word!"
And then he sang a song:
The hedgehog's point of view
I turned twice Widdershins
And dream'd of hot stoo

Got Raven's lucky beak –
See, Death of Rats says SQUEAK
A slate is running
In Biers for me and you
So Happy Hogswatch
From Dots and Sadie
Making Morpork free of crime
And nightmares all come true...

TWOFLOWER:
They've got gnolls big as trolls
They've got wizards in robes
But the smell goes right through you
There's no rest for your nose
When we walked round the Shades
On that cold Hogswatch night
You promised me Ankh-Morpork vampires don't bite

VARIOUS MEMBERS OF THE BEGGARS' AND THIEVES' GUILDS:
"You were Bursar – "
"You were jolly..."
"You stank like Queen Molly!"
When the minstrels stopped playing
We set them alight
Piss Harry's "collecting"
Mossy Lawn, he's dissecting
We ate Dibbler's meat pies
And retched through the night

EVERYONE:
The boys from the YMPA Choir
Were singing sourly
And Dark Morris bells rang out
For Hogswatch Eve.

NOBBY AND COLON:
"You're a Fool, a nut-case."
"You're a civic disgrace,
"Swigging Bearhugger's booze
"Till you hoick on your shoes!"
"You Lancre sheep-shagger..."
"You unlicensed Beggar"
"Happy Hogswatch, you Nobbs - "
"Hope the Gods shut yer gob!"

EVERYONE:
The cops of the Day and Night Watch Choir
Committed harmony
And Dark Morris bells rang out
For Hogswatch Eve.

DUKE FELMET: "I could've ruled the Disc..."
DUCHESS FELMET: "Well, so could any twit!
"You took my crown from me
"When ghosts unmanned you..."
DUKE: "I killed for Lancre, dear
"I grabbed it for our own..."
DUCHESS: "I'd rather stand alone!"
ALL LANCRE TOGETHER: "But we could never stand you!"

EVERYONE:
The ghouls from the Bel-Shamharoth Choir
Were howling tunelessly
And Dark Morris bells rang out
For Hogswatch Eve!

The original lyrics can be found at:
www.pogues.com/Releases/Lyrics/LPs/IfIShould/Fairytale.html

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

12) ROUNDWORLD TALES: HEROES OF STEAM, AND A MODERN HARRY KING

12.1 RAILWAY HISTORY AND THE HEROES OF STEAM

The Ned Simnels of Roundworld:

John Blenkinsop (1783–1831) was an early steam inventor who designed the first practical and financially successful railway locomotive. In 1811 he patented a rack and pinion system for a locomotive. Blenkinsop locomotives had the first double-acting cylinders and no flywheel; the engines saw more than twenty years of service, until superseded by iron rail, which could carry the weight of the heavier adhesion locomotives, in 1820.

Richard Trevithick (1771–1833) was a Cornish engineer who developed the first high-pressure steam engine and built the first full-scale working railway steam locomotive, in 1802. As a child he often watched steam engines pump water from the mines and dreamt of using steam power for locomotion. Trevithick's (sadly, unnamed) steam locomotive hauled a train along the tramway of the Penydarren Ironworks, in Merthyr Tydfil, Wales, on 21st February 1804 – the world's first locomotive-hauled railway journey (although he was not the first experimenter using "strong steam": William Murdoch developed and demonstrated a model steam carriage in 1784, and had demonstrated it to Trevithick ten years later).

George Stephenson (1781–1848), renowned as the "Father of Railways" and best known for his engine "Rocket", built the first public inter-city railway line in the world to use steam locomotives: the Liverpool and Manchester Railway, which opened in 1830. His rail gauge of 4 feet 8 1/2 inches is to this day the world's standard gauge. Iron rails were prone to excessive brittleness and could not support the weight of steam locomotives; Stephenson solved the problem by using multiple wheels. He also built an 8-mile colliery railway at Hetton in 1820, which was the first railway to use no animal power. The Stockton and Darlington Railway, for which Stephenson used wrought iron rails, opened on 27th September 1825. The Stephenson engine "Locomotion", driven by its inventor, hauled an 80-ton load of coal and flour nine miles in two hours, reaching a then-amazing speed of 24 miles per hour. The first purpose-built passenger car, Experiment, was attached and carried dignitaries on the opening journey. Five years later, the opening ceremony of the London and Manchester Railway (15th September 1830) was attended by the great and good up to and including the Prime Minister and the Duke of Wellington. The parade was led by "Northumbrian" driven by Stephenson, and included "Phoenix" driven by his son Robert, "North Star" driven by his brother Robert and "Rocket" driven by assistant engineer Joseph Locke.

The fabulous engines:

"Catch Me Who Can", by Richard Trevithick, was built in 1808 and was demonstrated to the public at a "steam circus" organised by Trevithick on a circular track in Bloomsbury. Catch Me Who Can's top speed was 12 mph, but it was too heavy for the brittle cast-iron rails then in use; Trevithick ended the exhibition after a broken rail caused a derailment.

"Salamanca" by Matthew Murray, the first commercially successful steam locomotive, first rack and pinion locomotive and the first to have two cylinders, was built in 1812 for the Middleton Railway. Four locomotives of this class were built for the railway. Salamanca was destroyed six years later, when its boiler exploded; George Stephenson testified before a Parliamentary committee that its driver had tampered with the boiler safety valve.

"Blucher", by Stephenson, could pull a train of 30 tons at a speed of 4 mph up a gradient of 1 in 450. After measuring its performance parameters, Stephenson decided to break it down and recycle its parts for more advanced models. And of course everyone knows "Stephenson's Rocket", built in 1829 in Newcastle Upon Tyne. The Rocket won the Rainhill Trials held by the Liverpool & Manchester Railway in 1829 to choose the best design to power the railway. Though Rocket was not the first steam locomotive, it was the first "improved" steam locomotive, and it served as the template for most steam engines for 150 years.

"Northumbrian", another early Stephenson family locomotive used at the opening of the Liverpool and Manchester Railway, was the first locomotive to have the Stephenson type firebox incorporated in the boiler; it also featured a proper tender. "Planet", built in 1830, was the first locomotive to employ inside cylinders. On 23rd November 1830 No.9 Planet ran the 50 km from Liverpool to Manchester in one hour.

The Swansea and Mumbles Railway in Wales was the world's first passenger railway service. Originally a horse-powered railway for moving limestone from the Mumbles quarries, it carried the world's first fare-paying railway passengers on 25th March 1807 and was converted to steam in 1877, and then to electricity before finally closing in January 1960, at which point it had been the world's longest serving railway.

The Kilmarnock and Troon Railway in Ayrshire, the first railway in Scotland to use a steam locomotive and the first to carry passengers, opened in 1812. The passenger service operated at first with just trucks filled with straw for passengers, but later two dedicated carriages ("Caledonia" and "The Boat") were added. A regular passenger service, costing one shilling for the two-hour journey, started on 1st May 1813.

12.2 IN THE FOOTSTEPS OF HARRY KING

An article by Rebecca Burn-Callander in The Telegraph:

"Where there's muck, there's brass, or so the old saying goes. And given that we generate about 177 million tonnes of waste every year in England alone, that's a lot of brass. Last year, sales of coffee outpaced tea sales for the first time in the UK. Research by Allegra shows that the category grew 7.5pc to reach £5.8bn sales in 2012. Coffee-making is highly wasteful, however, as the entire bean is thrown away once the flavour is extracted. London alone produces 200,000 tonnes of coffee waste every year. UCL architecture student Arthur Kay landed on an idea to turn these waste coffee grounds into fuel last year. 'I wanted to design a coffee shop where all the coffee grounds were turned into biodiesel to provide light and heat for the shop,' he explained. All vegetables have oil content but no technology existed for extracting the energy from coffee. Mr Kay enlisted the services of a team of bio-chemical engineers and developed a brand new technology for processing the new waste stock... Bio-bean collects from coffee shops, roasters and instant coffee manufacturers across London and transports the waste grounds to a processing unit in Edmonton, where the material is turned into biodiesel and pellets. Previously, these companies were paying £64 a tonne for the waste to be dumped in landfill, with transport costs taking the total per tonne to £154. Bio-Bean pays a nominal fee for the waste, as covers the cost of collection. Unsurprisingly, the growth of the business has been exponential. Still in its first year, Bio-Bean is forecast to turn over £7.5m by 2016. London Mayor Boris Johnson has declared his support for Bio-Bean, awarding it his Low Carbon Prize this year. 'This level of green innovation is brilliant to see,' he said. 'We are 100pc behind Bio-Bean, which is absolutely full of beans.'..."

http://tinyurl.com/k9vnfd5

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

13) IMAGES OF THE MONTH

It's the pTARDIS!

http://tinyurl.com/n4o9see

The cover of Night Watch, admirably re-created at the 2013 Irish Discworld Convention:

http://pop-verse.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/IMG_0754_med.jpg

The Rince Cycle on stage at the Studio Theatre:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BaI_wc3IEAAaAEj.jpg

A Temple of Om on Roundworld?:

http://tinyurl.com/o2c9yr9

...and finally, some appealing fanart – Constable Dorfl:

http://tinyurl.com/msm2ahf

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

14) CLOSE

We may be back before the end of the month, if time allows. Also coming next, reviews of the hardcover Carpet People, the hardcover Mort, and the delicious Dodger's Guide to London. All I can assure you at the moment is that all three are fantastic.

And that's it for the moment, as the holiday season looms and your Editor is under starter's orders. WOSSNAME wishes all our readers and all on Team Pratchett a fun and safe Hogswatch Season, and all the best for the coming Year of the Reciprocating Llama!

– Annie Mac

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

———————————————————————————————————
The End. If you have any questions or requests, write: interact (at) pearwood (dot) info
———————————————————————————————————
Copyright (c) 2013 by Klatchian Foreign Legion

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NEWSFLASH: the Clacks Collector's Edition is coming at last!
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Wossname -- December 2019 -- Main issue
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Newsletter of the KFL since the Century of the Fruitbat

Entries tagged with december

NEWSFLASH: the Clacks Collector's Edition is coming at last!

Wossname – December 2021 – main issue

Wossname - December 2020 - Main issue

NEWSFLASH: A BRAND NEW YEAR!

Wossname -- December 2019 -- Main issue

Wossname -- December 2017 -- Main issue

NEWSFLASH: Tony Robinson and Rob Wilkins in Salisbury

Wossname -- December 2016 -- main issue

NEWSFLASH: Nullus Anxietas updates

NEWSFLASH: and 2017 will be...

Wossname -- December 2015 -- Main issue

Wossname -- December 2014 -- Main issue

WOSSNAME Main Issue, December 2013