Oct. 26th, 2015

wossname: (GNU Terry Pratchett)
Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
October 2015 (Volume 18, Issue 10, Post 1)

WOSSNAME is a free publication offering news, reviews, and all the other stuff-that-fits pertaining to the works and activities of Sir Terry Pratchett. Originally founded by the late, great Joe Schaumburger for members of the worldwide Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates, including the North American Discworld Society and other continental groups, Wossname is now for Discworld and Pratchett fans everywhere in Roundworld.

Editor in Chief: Annie Mac
News Editor: Vera P
Newshounds: Mogg, Sir J of Croydon Below, the Shadow, Wolfiekins, Mss C, Alison not Aliss
Staff Writers: Asti, Pitt the Elder, Evil Steven Dread, Mrs Wynn-Jones
Staff Technomancers: Jason Parlevliet, Archchancellor Neil, DJ Helpful
Book Reviews: Annie Mac, Drusilla D'Afanguin, Your Name Here
Puzzle Editor: Tiff (still out there somewhere)
Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic
Emergency Staff: Steven D'Aprano, Jason Parlevliet
World Membership Director: Steven D'Aprano (in his copious spare time)






"I'm tremendously grateful to Terry for the chances he gave me, for the opportunity he gave me to change my life in ways I couldn't possibly imagine."

– Stephen Briggs

"People like to be told what they already know. Remember that. They get uncomfortable when you tell them *new* things. New things ... well, new things aren't what they expect. They like to know that, say, a dog will bite a man. That is what dogs do. They don't want to know that a man bites a dog, because the world is not supposed to happen like that. In short, what people *think* they want is news, but what they really crave is *olds*."

– Lord Vetinari to William de Worde (The Truth, Doubleday hardcover p. 77)

"We are delighted and honoured to display the Discworld Knight. Terry was a regular patron and would have been pleased to see this statue in the restaurant where he so often raised a glass with friends."

– Elizabeth Edwards, manager of the Queen's Head, Sir Pterry's local pub



October has been a month of waiting for me. Waiting on tenterhooks. Waiting for the Compleat Discworld Atlas to arrive. Waiting for Wossname's hose copy of Clacks to arrive. Waiting for a certain exclusive report to come back from the person who is vetting it... and as of today the waiting for all of these continues, but ticking clocks and hissing sand demand that we go to press... erm, to clacks... and so we shall.

Things waited for will arrive, and be reported on, but for the moment, enjoy this issue of Wossname which is full of news. And possibly some olds. And if you haven't re-read The Truth recently, do give it a go – coming back to it after almost fifteen years, I found The Truth to be a weighty and significant story disguised (brilliantly so) as a lightweight comedy caper. Beautiful stuff...

On with the show!

– Annie Mac, Editor




Here be a wonderful video of Mr Briggs at Sir Terry's home, talking about their 25-year collaboration and how it changed his world:


The video can also be accessed via http://www.shakespearecodex.co.uk/ – click on the orangeish button on the lower left of the homepage.

Many thanks go to Mr Briggs for this gift to the fans!


In a lovely eleven minute video, Rob answers questions put to him by attendees of the Scheibenwelt (German Discworld) convention. He discusses the possible Discworld Lego set, forthcoming productions from Narrativia, and gives some fascinating bits of inside knowledge – including the fact that Sir Pterry left the world of the living to the sound of Meatloaf's classic Bat Out of Hell! Some quotes:

"Yes, there will be other adaptations, for the TV and for the big screen, but I can't be specific about which novels..."

"Terry really did leave behind a huge volume of unpublished material... The ideas are ideas we discussed together, so maybe some episodes of The Watch will be influenced by some of that material..."

"Did we ever have an argument? We argued every day! Every day I quit, and every day Terry sacked me... but we only argued if we were arguing about a plot point... we did argue, but it was always about the story... we did make it up very quickly..."

"Can you imagine being at the forefront of the creative process, sitting beside Terry Pratchett every day as he wrote..."

"I can honestly say that out of all the fan mail Terry received, Eskarina Smith was asked about the most..."

"Terry left what he called 'anchors' throughout his writing, and could refer back to them -- something you as a reader would have skimmed over, wouldn't have even noticed at the time, and yet he would refer to it twenty-five novels later..."





As mentioned in the previous issue...

"Sir Terry Pratchett is a national icon when it comes to creating fantasy worlds that bring joy to millions of people. With over 70 books and 75 million copies sold worldwide, he created a powerful legacy that has encouraged reading and creativity. And here in Salisbury we were lucky enough to have him as a local resident for over 20 years. He worked with local people and artists, and made wonderful contributions to the local hospital.

"But there is little to inform the guests and residents of this vastly popular city of Sir Terry's involvement, or the love the community had for him in return. Salisbury take pride in many notable statues and works of art across the city, but we would like to campaign for a permanent statue, in a prominent location, in memory of Sir Terry's incalculable role in the culture of this country.

"Our aim will be to contact local officials via Salisbury City Council to either encourage them to take on the project themselves, or grant us permission to work with them in making it happen. If funding becomes an issue, it is possible that crowd-sourcing some of the costs could be viable, with any additional money raised going towards those charities supported by Sir Terry."

If you wish to sign the online petition, go to:



The Discworld Baron was auctioned to the tune of £5,000 for the Trussell Trust, making it the highest-priced of the Barons. At first it was credited to a mystery bidder, but soon the bidder was identified as none other than Rob Wilkins himself. Now it has been donated to a permanent place in the Queen's Head pub in Broad Chalke, Wiltshire – otherwise known as Sir Pterry's local!

The Charter Barons project raised £200,000 altogether for the Trussell Trust, which coordinates the ever-increasing number of vital food banks in the UK.

This from Discworld.com, formerly PJSM Prints:

"The Discworld Knight baron has this week taken up residency at The Queen's Head pub in Broad Chalke in Wiltshire, where it will be on display for the next couple of months before moving to its permanent home in the Chalke Valley. It is hard to imagine a more fitting tribute to Terry for whom this statue was dedicated. The design of the baron was already in production at the time of Terry's untimely passing on 12th March 2015. His family kindly gave permission for The Discworld Knight to remain in The Barons' Charter project in his memory and at the auction on 1st October, Rob Wilkins was the winning bidder. Rob worked alongside Terry for many years, and felt that the most fitting tribute to the author would be to secure the magnificent statue and place it in the author's favourite pub for all to admire. 'We all know that Terry had the most incredible sense of humour, and would have taken great delight in reappearing here to keep an eye on the locals,' he said..."

To read the whole announcement, go to:



On The Bookseller:

"Illustrators are now listed on the CILIP Carnegie 2016 nominations list, revealed today (19th October), following last year's complaint from author/illustrator Sarah McIntyre. In October 2014, CILIP nominated Oliver and the Seawigs (OUP Children's Books) for the 2015 Carnegie medal, mentioning writer Philip Reeve as the author but not McIntyre, who illustrated the book. McIntyre, who said she co-created the story, suggested the organisers should open the award up to books attributed to co-authors. 'Because the book has a lot of illustrations it has a shorter text; the world is built by the pictures as well as the words.' Her campaign has paid off because the titles nominated for the 2016 Carnegie medal are listed with both the author and illustrator. So both Jacqueline Wilson and Nick Sharratt are listed for Katy (Puffin), as are David Walliams and Tony Ross for Awful Auntie (HarperCollins Children's Books) and Terry Pratchett and Paul Kidby for The Shepherd's Crown (Doubleday Children's Books)..."

The full list of nominations can be found online at http://bit.ly/1PBvhne



"Tim Parry from Alzheimer's Research UK said that the late author had transformed attitudes towards the disease. 'Terry Pratchett has played a huge role in just bringing it to people's attention and beginning to change the language towards the idea that we actually may be able to fight these diseases,' he said. 'He was the first person to say he wanted to kick it in the arse.' Parry, who is head of communications for the organisation, also spoke about how crucial it was to remove the stigma and shame around the disease, and that Pratchett's frank and very public discussion of his condition had helped..."



In the Western Morning News:

"Members of the Exeter Camera Club have curated a series of exhibition to celebrate the club's 125th anniversary, making it one of the oldest camera clubs in the country. The black and white and monochrome photographs are currently being exhibited all month at The Cafe, Topsham, Devon. Photographer Phil Lockett paid tribute to author Terry Pratchett in his image 'A Tribute to Sir Terry'. He said: 'The image idea came very easily, it was the most natural of reactions when you hear news of a personal loss, to stop what you're doing or reading, take off your glasses and just absorb what that news meant. The book was one on my bookshelf I knew had his famous Death character appearing in, and I wanted him evident on the pages spread open. Death always speaks all in uppercase. I let the book fall open pretty much unguided and placed the glasses gently before taking the picture.'"


The photograph: http://bit.ly/1GO2Lrs


By Allen Adams for the Maine Edge:

"One of the reasons that Pratchett is so beloved is his ability to create richly detailed worlds. 'The World of Poo' was essentially a throwaway joke in 'Snuff,' and yet Pratchett managed to extrapolate that brief bit into something fully formed and – frankly – awfully funny. It is Pratchett all the way down, too, with plenty of winks and nods to various other Discworld properties and even a handful of his usual footnotes. As for readers of all ages, that is absolutely accurate. Granted, there's a lot of nuance that one could only pick up if one was familiar with Discworld, what with the sly references and central roles for a couple of Discworld's tertiary characters. However, while those details will enhance the enjoyment of the more experienced, younger readers will find plenty to delight them. It's a sweet story about a curious little boy who is fascinated by poo – no doubt there are more than a few kids just like Geoffrey out there in the wide world. Poo is hilarious and no one understands that better than little boys. 'The World of Poo' is a delight, working on multiple levels to engage and entertain young and old alike..."




By Rene Nol for the Otago Times:

"Someone once said of Terry Pratchett that he was the kindest teacher you could ever have. Certainly for me he was the funniest. The research (he insisted it was pleasure reading) Pratchett did for his Discworld books was astoundingly wide-ranging, as he gleaned obscure tidbits, about the grittier side of Victorian London (from the sewers up, literally) say, to the sublime works of Leonardo da Vinci, among a host of subjects. These were then processed by Pratchett's lively imagination to reappear sometimes as major themes in his books, sometimes as one-liner jokes. Even a chance encounter was enough to set Pratchett's mind working: he once saw a large woman struggling with her wheeled suitcase, which appeared to have a mind of its own regarding where it was going. From this was born the Luggage, a chest on dozens of little legs. It was bound to follow its owner wherever that might be (even through time itself), and it radiated malevolence when in the mood.

"It is tempting to think Pratchett had his own demise at the front of his mind when he was writing The Shepherd's Crown..."


By Scott Wilson on Popzara:

"Reading this novel made me realize just how different Discworld stories can be told just by changing the age of the character. Most of the political satire and adult humor is replaced with more toned down versions, which are pretty funny, but not in the same way. Another oddity about this novel is a trend that carried over from his previous book, Raising Steam, in which many of the point-of-view characters seen in different chapters only pop up once and are never heard from again, while established characters seem to miss out on the action. While it does a good job of saying goodbye to Discworld as a whole, The Shepherd's Crown feels like one of the weakest stories in the series. Many of the situations and villains are reused from earlier works without much more characterization. It carries many of the usual themes that Pratchett uses, such as sexism, change, and the inevitability of death, but everything seems to resolve entirely too easy, and very rarely is there much conflict between characters... The Shepherd's Crown is not an ending. It is, however, a reminder of stories that will never be told..."


By Hannah Sissons on Forge Fuse:

"The Shepherd's Crown is the fifth and final book about Tiffany and Pratchett keeps her spirit beautifully alive throughout. Pratchett's book is laced with ideas which he evidently wanted the world to know of before he departed... Whilst written for younger readers, this book can appreciated by anyone of any age. It stands for friendship, hard work, family and above all real magic; magic that is created, not by swishing a wand around or reading off spells, but by embracing our humanity, speaking for those with no voice and caring for those in need..."



More from blogger Nat Wassell, on Cultured Vultures:

On Equal Rites: 'Equal Rites' is the third book in the series, and it is a landmark point in the series for several reasons. One of the things I noticed during this novel was that Sir Terry never tries to disguise the narrative voice as being anything but his own. There are a lot of metaphors that come up which involve comparisons to things like dodgems and radio, things that do not exist on the disc and therefore cannot be compared by anyone who is not firmly of our own world. I wonder if this is a deliberate move on Sir Terry's part, claiming Discworld for his own and allowing no one to mistake it as belonging to anyone but him. There is no omniscient third party here, telling the stories. There is only Terry Pratchett and his wacky, wonderful imagination..."


On Mort: "I think the fact that Death is one of the most fleshed out, sympathetic characters in the whole series tells you everything that you need to know about Discworld and the delight that Pratchett takes in inverting the norm. If Granny Weatherwax was Pratchett's muse, Death was his closest companion... When I was first discovering Discworld, 'Mort' was the title that kept coming up as the best place to start, although I never followed that advice. On doing some informal research now (stalking Tumblr and Goodreads) it seems that a lot of people agree on 'Mort' being one of the best in the series. I'll be honest though; I didn't like it that much the first time round. I liked Death, but then it is difficult not to like him, he is so warm, so endearing, so funny. It was everything else that I didn't much care for; Mort as character was not my favourite, although I liked him more than Rincewind, and the story didn't quite make sense to me. If it had been the first book that I picked up, I cannot say for sure that I would have carried on with the rest of them. So I'm pleased to say that, the second time around, 'Mort' was much more enjoyable for me... In terms of style, the main thing I noticed is that one of my main gripes from the first three novels – the fact that Pratchett has a habit of repeating himself a lot – has been put to a stop here, and that Pratchett even comments on it, like he has suddenly realised he was doing it. It's self-conscious writing and it shows a respect for the reader; he knows that they will have noticed and he makes no apologies for it, but does accept he was doing it..."





It's that time at last! After a long run-up, the Uppingham Theatre Company will be staging their production of Wyrd Sisters at the end of this month. Many thanks to Vikki Shelton and her team for the updates – it looks like this production will be truly excellent!

When: Thursday 29th October through Saturday 31st October 2015
Venue: Uppingham Theatre, 32 Stockerston Road, Uppingham, Rutland LE15 9UD
Time: 7.30pm all evening shows; Saturday matinee 2.30pm
Tickets: £10 (includes a £2 charity donation per ticket to Rutland Reminders). Available in person from Uppingham Sports and Books, 9 High Street East, Uppingham. To purchase online, go to https://www.wegottickets.com/location/1664

A special Discworld menu to accompany the production, devised by the Uppingham Theatre Company's Vikki Shelton and approved by Colin Smythe, will be served at The Vaults restaurant, The Market Place, Uppingham LE15 9QH starting on the 18th October through to 31st October to help Uppingham Theatre Company raise money for Rutland Reminders (50p from the price of each plate). To enquire about booking a table for a pre Wyrd Sisters meal, or for more information, contact Tom on 01572 823259. "Please pre order your food to ensure its availability, and be mindful of the play's starting time if you are eating pre show"




Editor's note: for some fun photos of the cast larking about, go to http://wossname.dreamwidth.org/24897.html


The Lismore Theatre Company continues to present their production of Mort this month.

When: 30 and 31 October 2015; also, matinee performance on the 25th
Venue: Rochdale Theatre, 603 Ballina Rd, Goonellabah, New South Wales 2480
Time: 8pm all evening shows; 5pm matinee
Tickets: $20 all shows except for the performance on 31st October which is $30 as it will be a special Halloween fancy dress night. Tickets are available at the door, or to pre-purchase online go to:

http://www.trybooking.com/158774 (for all performances except the 31st)
http://www.trybooking.com/158775 (for the Halloween Gala night)



The Watlington Players will present their production of Wyrd Sisters at the end of this month.

When: 29th – 31st October
Venue: Watlington Village Hall, Church Road, Watlington, King's Lynn, Norfolk, PE33 0HE
Time: 7.30pm
Tickets: £7 (£5 concessions). To purchase online, go to

"If you wish to pay with cash or cheque, the box office can be called between 6.00pm and 7.00pm – 0845 052 9645.
We would like to invite you all to dress up as your favourite Pratchett or Halloween character for our Saturday night performance, however this will not be an essential!"



The Alexandra Players will present their production of Wyrd Sisters at the end of this month.

When: 28th–31st October 2015
Venue: Alexandra Hall, Bramshot Avenue, Charlton, London SE7
Time: 8pm (Wednesday 28th, Thursday 29th, Friday 30th); 7pm (Saturday 31st)
Tickets: £9 (£8 concessions). To order online, go to http://alexandraplayers.org.uk/?page_id=2738 and use the booking form on the page, or for a block of more than four tickets email alexandraplayers@gmail.com



The Dereham Theatre Company will present their production of Wyrd Sisters next March. All performance royalties for will be donated to The Orangutan Foundation!

When: Thursday 10th March through Saturday 12th March 2016
Venue: Dereham Memorial Hall, 61 Norwich Street, Dereham NR19 1AD
Time: 7.30pm all performances
Tickets: TBA


The online audition form can be found at http://dosoc.co.uk/audition.asp

Read-Through: Monday October 26th at 7:30pm.
Auditions: Saturday October 31st from approx. 11:00am till 5:00pm
Venue: The Studio, Rear of Dereham Memorial Hall, 62 Norwich Street, Dereham NR19 1AD

"It is beneficial to attend one or both read-throughs to get a feel for the play and characters, although not necessarily essential. Please make sure you are available for the whole Audition day. If you are unable to make this or need to attend at a specific time, please let us know ASAP. Whilst it will not count against you, learning the extracts ahead of Auditions will help us judge your comedic skill. Also whilst accents can be worked on (we have six months) we are looking for at least some effort in speaking with the appropriate dialect... There are 33 individual parts and we're aiming for a cast of around twenty. Those not in lead parts are likely to be playing 2–4 characters throughout the production and there are plenty of lines (and comedy moments) to go around...

"A full Audition Timetable will be e-mailed by Thursday October 29th. However, if you have any further questions, e-mail me at secretary@dosoc.co.uk."




Discworld plays and Cambridge Footlights – what's not to like? The ADC Theatre will present their production of Maskerade in December.

"After the sell-out success of Wyrd Sisters, Bawds bring another Discworld to the ADC Theatre with their unique mix of film, music and comedy, directed by a former President of the Footlights and dedicated to the proposition that 'in opera, no-one can hear you scream'."

When: Tuesday 8th – Saturday 12 December 2015
Venue: ADC Theatre, Park Street, Cambridge CB5 8AS (phone 01223 300085). "Parking is available in Park Street Car Park operated by Cambridge City Council. Street parking on Jesus Lane is often available for minibuses and other large vehicles. Approach must be made via Victoria Avenue or Maids Causeway due to traffic restrictions."
Time: 7.45pm
Tickets: £12/£10 concessions (Tue & Sat Matinee £10/£8 concessions). To book, go to https://www.adctheatre.com/whats-on/drama/maskerade.aspx and select a date from the drop-down menu on the right of the page



The Queen's Hall Theatre Club will perform their production of Wyrd Sisters in November.

When: Thursday 26th – Saturday 28th November 2015
Venue: Main Theatre, Queen's Hall Arts Centre, Beaumont Street, Hexham, Northumberland NE46 3LS (Box Office 01434 652477)
Time: 7:30pm
Tickets: £10 (concessions £9, under 18s £7). The Box Office is open from 10.00am – 5.00pm Monday to Friday & 10.00am to 4.00pm Saturday and one hour before the start of every performance. To buy online, go to http://bit.ly/1O5eIAp and click on the tab marked BOOK, then click the BOOK tab for the date of your choice.



The Marlow Players will present their production of Unseen Academicals in November.

When: 12th, 13th and 14th November 2015
Venue: Shelley Theatre, Court Garden, Pound Lane, Marlow, Bucks SL7 2AG
Time: 8pm all shows
Tickets: £12. To purchase online, go to http://marlowplayers.org.uk/product-category/boxoffice/



The Thalian Theatre Group are back in November with a new Discworld production: Making Money!

When: Thurs. 12th – Sat. 14th November 2015
Venue: Mirren Studio, Towngate Theatre, St Martin's Square, Basildon, Essex SS14 1DL.
Time: 8pm
Tickets: £10 (£8.50 concessions), with a booking fee of £1. To purchase online, go to http://thaliantheatregroup.wix.com/thalian and click on the tickets image. To reserve tickets by phone, ring 01268 417854. A percentage of ticket sales will be donated to Alzheimer's Research UK.

Box Office telephone: 01268 465 465.




"Discworld's 'stars' have to stop the elves taking over our world, make Shakespeare write A Midsummer Night's Dream ... and ensure the potato is discovered! Featuring Ridcully, Rincewind, Granny Weatherwax, Angua, Vetinari, Shakespeare, Queen Elizabeth I ... & the Earl of Oxford. Based loosely on The Science of Discworld II: the Globe, Lords & Ladies, and A Midsummer Night's Dream. Staged on 6 to 9 April 2016 (both Terry's and Shakespeare's birth month)... We're expecting quite a lot of interest in this show, so *early booking* (particularly for the weekend performances) is recommended. Block booking discounts will be available for the Wed and Thu performances."

When: 6th-9th April 2016
Venue: Unicorn Theatre, Medieval Abbey Buildings, Checker Walk/Thames Street, Abingdon, OXON, OX14 3HZ
Time: TBA
Tickets: £10.00 (Wed, Thu, Fri shows) and £11.00 (Sat mat and evening shows)



An article about the Henley Players' recent production of Maskerade featured tributes to Sir Pterry from sibling actors George and Harry Petrie:

Two brothers appearing in a play based on the work of Sir Terry Pratchett have each written their own tribute to the late author... Among the cast of the play, the plot of which is said to carry echoes of The Phantom of the Opera, are brothers George and Harry Petrie. Together, they decided to use the occasion to pay tribute to Sir Terry, who died in March.

George says: 'I grew up with Pratchett and in every book, movie, play or game I have enjoyed I can find certain similarities in his style. My views on both art and modern life are shaped by his unique way of looking at any subject. He saw both the way things often presented themselves as well as the way they looked from angles you hadn't considered before. I sincerely doubt I would be as cynical, or as in love with creative fiction as I am without his influence. Beyond what he meant as a writer, whose work I love, he also stood as an exemplar of what an artist should be: looking at genres outside your own and expanding your view of the world and your mind constantly; never looking down at alternative art forms but instead looking for ways you can express yourself through them. Above all, he held that money was 'an unavoidable consequence' and that the only reason to write, to create, was it gave you joy to do so.'

Harry says: 'Having come to Pratchett's works at a later point than my brother, I found their wonderful oddness and fantastic humour a constant joy. His inimitable style has left it's impression deep on both the way I write, as well as how I view the world. Having greatly felt his passing, as did legions upon throngs of his fans, finding a means of paying tribute to the man that had, and will always have an immense impact on me, has been no mean feat. But I hope, as I am sure my fellow cast members do, that our production of Maskerade will in some small way show our appreciation, respect and love for both the man and his works.'



The Bart Players will present their production of Wyrd Sisters in late November!

25th–28th November 2015
Venue: Bart Players, 183 Stranmillis Road, Belfast
Time: 7.30pm all shows
Tickets: £10.00 (Concession for Under 18/Over 60s/Students £8.00; groups of 10 or more will earn a discount). Tickets can be purchased online at https://www.ticketsource.co.uk/bartplayers – or by email to bartplayersbelfast@gmail.com,
or by phoning 028 9020 2280.




Here comes Clacks!

"The Fastest (non-magical) Messaging System on the Discworld. Using a semaphore system of shuttered lamps on top of high towers, the Grand Trunk Semaphore Company has revolutionised long distance communications on the Discworld. Their network of towers covers most of the Unnamed Continent, but now the old postal service is fighting back. Driven by the determination of newly 'volunteered' Post Master 'Moist Von Lipwig' the Ankh-Morpork Post Office has challenged the Clacks operators to a race from Ankh-Morpork to Genua.

"Play against your friends and claim the title of Fastest Clacks Operator on the line, or Play together as a team to win the race across the Discworld and prove that Clacks is here to stay. In the box there is rules for 'player versus player', a 'co-operative race game' against the Post Office and a 'Children's introductory game'. Clacks artwork was created by Amber Grundy (a.k.a The Artful Nudger)."

Meanwhile, while Wossname awaits the delivery of our copy, here be the story of Clacks and how it came to Roundworld...

"Back in September 2011 Leonard Boyd and I (David Brashaw) who run Backspindle Games had recently published Guards! Guards! A Discworld Boardgame in conjunction with Z-Man Games. Both being from Ireland we thought, where was the best place to be just after its release? The Irish Discworld Convention, of course! This venture was not without its challenges as it took us five hours 'by car" to get there, while many others who had travelled from across Europe got there in less than four hours... We were mostly delayed by a Post Office van that was broken down at the Mad Cow roundabout. Funny how this later impacted subliminally in our game Clacks! (darn Post Office)... On the final day when we were all packed up and relaxing in the lounge, we talked with other delegates about the Sky TV adaptations of Discworld books. I had just said that my favourite one was Going Postal and the great race when Leonard came out with the statement, "I'm sure there is a good game in there somewhere." Hence we started talking about how many lamps were on a Clacks tower, the type of alphabet, semaphore, and transmission of words, and in no time at all had come up with an initial idea of a board game in which players would compete to transmit words.

"Once back safe and sound in County Down we developed the idea further, agreeing on how many lamps should be on a board, and Leonard devised the Clacks alphabet. We dug out our respective copies of Going Postal for reference purposes. Leonard then created a simple board and tile lamp stickers while I got some wooden blocks cut and painted them black with the interference of our cat — they became his plaything while drying on the windowsill — and we had a demo game ready to go...

This is a good, long, detailed diary of the development of Clacks, well worth taking the time to read while you await delivery of your own copy.


Not ordered your copy yet? You know you want to! You can get Clacks from...





"Next week I am releasing my new fine art limited edition signed print: Drawings from the Shepherd's Crown. It features 12 iconic vignette illustrations including Tiffany, Rob Anybody, Mephistopheles the Goat and You the Cat."

A photo collage of the drawings:



"Welcome one and all to Spindlewinter at Discworld.com HQ. 'Tis the month for all things Eldritch and Discworld's finest have taken over our website until Hallows Eve. To celebrate the witching hour, you can now add the NEW Granny Weatherwax bust to your collection, and sport our elegant NEW Granny T-shirt. We're also hailing the return of the Collector's Death Pin and bringing our popular Roundworld section back. Not only that but we've added a handy 'New Products' section! Join us as the season changes, rejoice in the magic of Discworld and follow your heart to the Lancre Coven..."

* The Granny bust:

"Based on Paul Kidby's illustrations of Granny, this detailed bust is made from high-quality resin and is ideal for painting."

The unpainted Granny Weatherwax bust is priced at £28. For more information, and to order, go to:


* The Granny t-shirt:

"A silhouette image of Discworld's foremost practitioner of headology, in striking colours from a design by Paper Panda. For this design in classic fit we use Gildan 200gsm weight garments in 100% cotton. They have taped neck and shoulders, seamless twin needle 7/8″ collar, quarter-turned to eliminate crease. The image is applied using a hard-wearing purple Superflex Vinyl. For the skinny fits we use combed and ringspun 100% cotton in 145gsm weight. They have shoulder taping to maintain shape, a longer body length and flattering side-seaming."

The Granny Weatherwax Papercut t-shirt is priced at £15. For more information, and to order, go to:


* The Death pin:

"When released back in 2008, this proved to be one of our most popular pins ever produced. Inspired by Death's Domain: A Discworld Mapp, the design features purple enameling, Death's famous piercing blue eyes and the motto 'NVLLA IVSTITIA EST EGO SOLVM EST'. The detailing and art nouveau styling is simply stunning. VERY LIMITED STOCK!"

The Death Pin is priced at £60. For more information, and to order, go to:


"Soon we'll be hearing the tramping of hogs and decking the Discworld.com halls with sausages again so we're delighted to introduce our fab new 'Festive Favourites' page, a quick-click option for all your Hogswatch specials, and some nifty stocking fillers. Keep an eye on this page over the coming weeks as we'll keep it up to date with all the finest finery for your festive frolics!"

* The Festive Favourites include a selection of button badges priced at £1 each (Nanny Ogg, Hogfather, Feegles, etc.), a Death as Hogfather pin priced at £3.50, and a Death as Hogfather 30mm metal cast miniature priced at £8.50. For more information, and to order, go to:


"We're feeling social here at Discworld.com HQ and are delighted to welcome you to our Facebook, Twitter and Instagram as well as encouraging you to chat to us on email, Reddit and see our latest photos on Flickr. Please join us and do offer your opinions, we value your views and love seeing your photos and collections!"

email: pr@discworld.com

We're giving away a set of US paperback edition copies of the first four Tiffany novels this month. Simply email your answer to the following question to pr@discworld.com to be entered into the draw. "Name the third son of Lord Swivel". Good luck!"


* Terry Pratchett's Folio!

"This highly collectable hardback, originally produced for fans at the 2014 UK Discworld convention when Terry himself was unable to attend, stands at just over five inches tall. 'Terry Pratchett's Folio', contains two scenes cut from Raising Steam, Terry's advice for life, Rob Wilkins' thoughts on Terry, an Ode to Multiple Universes, and is embossed with Terry's personal coat of arms. All proceeds from this special keepsake will go to the RICE centre in Bath."

The Terry Pratchett Folio is priced at £25. For more information, and to order, go to


* The Discworld survey!

"Please take a moment to help us! We'd like you to have your say on our future product range..."




Get-cher Compleat Discworld Atlas heeeere! Companion piece to the Compleat Ankh-Morpork, now available to Roundworld customers!

"Your Compleat guide to the geography and topography of Discworld! The Compleat Discworld Atlas is a wondrously witty travel guide brought to you by The Ankh-Morpork Guild of Trespassers and Unseen University Press. Each atlas boasts full colour plate maps, sumptuous illustrations and a comprehensive gazetteer, all accompanied by a giant double-sided map featuring a magnificent vision of The World Turtle A'Tuin and wonderfully detailed delineation of the Disc on the reverse. The Compleat Discworld Atlas is our final collaboration with Sir Terry Pratchett. A project 3 years in the making, this new guide to the extraordinary world he created was completed before his untimely death in March 2015.

"To honour this auspicious publication each copy from the Emporium includes a souvenir travel poster as a gift from us."

The Compleat Discworld Atlas is priced at £25 (and that's cutting their own throats!). For more information, and to order, go to:


"Accompany your Discworld Atlas with our exclusive set of postcard prints, featuring 7a exotic scenes from the atlas itself. Send them, frame them, or use them to mark your place in your favourite Discworld books! The world is your mollusc with our exclusive set of postcard prints featuring artwork from the Compleat Discworld Atlas and Mrs Bradshaw's Handbook! Frame them, send them, or use them as bookmarks – each set includes 7a postcards from Ankh-Morpork, Lancre, Sto Lat, Big Cabbage, Uberwald, Genua, Old Treachery and Krull, each printed in a traditional vintage postcard finish."

The set includes postcards of the Wonderful Fanny, Big Cabbage, Lancre, Uberwald, Krull, Sto Lat, Genua, and of course Ankh-Morpork ("I survived the Mended Drum and all I got was this lousy postcard").

The Discworld Postcard Prints set is priced at £5. For more information, and to order, go to:


"A brand new puzzle game based on Discworld's "Clacks" semaphore messaging system, as featured in Sir Terry Pratchett's novel Going Postal! Play against your friends and claim the title of Fastest Clacks Operator on the line, or play together as a team to win the race against the Post Office across the Discworld in this strategic puzzle game from the makers of Guards! Guards!. Using a semaphore system of shuttered lamps on top of high towers, the Grand Trunk Semaphore Company has revolutionized long-distance communications on the Discworld. Their network of towers covers most of the Unnamed Continent, but now the old postal service is fighting back. Driven by the determination of newly "volunteered" Post Master Moist Von Lipwig, the Ankh-Morpork Post Office has challenged the Clacks operators to a race from Ankh-Morpork to Genua! Contains rules for a player vs. player game, a co-operative race game against the Post Office, and a children's introductory game."

Clacks is priced at £29. For more information, and to order, go to:


"As a Terry-appointed Ankh-Morpork Consulate we are officially authorised to issue these truly fantastic Discworld artefacts, each featuring individual numbers, immigration stamps from your travels around the Disc, and a 'real' Ankh-Morpork duty stamp fixed inside. Knowing Terry Pratchett fans to be nought but trustworthy, each passport is pre-endorsed ready for you to fill in your details as honestly, or as imaginatively, as you wish. The Passport contains vital information on prohibited goods, currency, and work permits along with space for stamps should you visit the Discworld Emporium in person, or any other place that is silly enough to stamp it. Measures 100 x 140mm."

Each Discworld Passport is priced at £10. For more information, and to order, go to:


"Our popular Turtle Moves design by 2016 Discworld Calendar artist Joe McLaren is now available on a brand new tote bag as well as our bestselling t-shirts! These cotton shoppers have 'bags' of room, and long handles for ease of toting!"

Each Discworld Turtle Moves tote bag is priced at £7.50. For more information, and to order, go to:


It's back to school time for all you UU students out there!

Choose from a fine collection of Unseen University clothing and accessories, including the UU hoodie (£28); UU Scarf (£40); UU 35mm Alumni Badge (£4.50); UU Doctoral Badge (£4.95); The Librarian's 'Ook' badge (£4). For more information on each, and to order, go to:


"And finally, what better way to make your luggage stand out on the carousel (without numerous little legs) than a set of Discworld Luggage Labels! (warning: may irritate Sapient Pearwood). A set of six luggage labels harking from Discworld's new age of steam! Each label is a souvenir from adventures in Discworld travel, and has been printed to withstand the most rigorous of expeditions. With designs from favourite Discworld destinations including Lancre, Uberwald, and Ankh-Morpork along with designs from C.M.O.T. Dibbler travel, the Ankh-Morpork Guild of Trespassers, and the Ankh-Morpork and Sto Plains Hygienic Railway, our Discworld Luggage Labels will render your cases unique on the luggage carousel! Circular stickers measure 95mm diameter, rectangular designs measure 111 x 69mm."

Each Discworld Luggage Labels set is priced at £6. For more information, and to order, go to:





The Broken Drummers, "London's Premier Unofficially Official Discworld Group" (motto "Nil percussio est"), meets next on Monday 2nd November 2015 at the Monkey Puzzle, 30 Southwick Street, London, W2 1JQ. For more information, go to http://brokendrummers.org/ or email BrokenDrummers@gmail.com or nicholls.helen@yahoo.co.uk


Canberra, Australia has a new Discworld fan group, Drumknott's Irregulars! "We are a newly established Terry Pratchett & Discworld social group in Canberra called Drumknott's Irregulars. The group is open to all, people from interstate and overseas are welcome, and our events will not be heavily themed. Come along to dinner for a chat and good company. We welcome people all all fandoms (and none) and we would love to see you at one of our events, even if you're just passing through. Please contact us via Facebook (_https://www.facebook.com/groups/824987924250161/_) or Google Groups (_https://groups.google.com/forum/#!forum/drumknotts-irregulars_) or join us at our next event."


There is a new public Facebook meeting group, "The Gathering of the Loonies (Wincanton chapter)": "This group, by request of Jo in Bear will continue to be used for future unofficial (not run by the Emporium) fan Gatherings in Wincanton. Look here for information. Next event Loonies Christmas Party. Same weekend as Hogswatch would have been. ie 27/28/29 November."

Some updates, for anyone who'd like to attend:

The Victorian/Dickensian/Steampunk Gathering of The Loonies

* Deck the hall with balls of holly – bring some spare decorations and help us decorate our hall for a weekend of festivities
* We want to put up a tree for geeks – so if you have small geeky things to put in the tree – Deathstar baubles – toy Daleks – miniature magic wands – a fairy Mr Spock – anything geeky (even some festive Watchmen or Feegles – it's not a Discworld Tree – it's a Geeky Tree)
* The Good Old Days – Charge your beer mugs and gather around the tables for a fun chat about things that made you the geeks you are today – what was your first costume? – who was your first geeky crush? – what geeky books would be on your desert island? The stuff that has made you – you.
* The Victorian poor lived in hand-me downs & second hand clothes – so can we! Bring any costumes or bits of costumes you don't want to the Sweetman Hall and then buy/sell/barter/swop with somebody else.. Larks what fun we could have....
* In Victorian times urchins didn't know where their next meal was coming from and neither do we – forage in food establishments for your lunch...
* Geeky afternoon of Games
* Tea Duelling
* Promenade up and down the High Street in you best Geeky togs.... Victorians loved nothing better than walking around showing off their finery – we can do the same in anything geeky – Steampunks – Victorians – Witches - Seamstresses – Trekky costumes – Fez's and long scarves....anything
* Join us for a geeky Xmas Meal – Bring crackers and have a festive Geeky dinner... [Note: Saturday supper at Bear is
£12 for two courses, £8.95 one course, or £3.95 for pudding only. Turkey, beef or vegetarian option (aromatic Moroccan stew with couscous), and Christmas Pudding to finish. Please call the Bear to book]
* After Dinner Victorians didn't sit watching the TV or playing video games – they gathered around the piano and sang songs and played silly parlour games and entertained themselves – we geeks can do the same – sing songs – tell jokes etc – NOT A SHOW – but everybody entertaining everybody...
* It's not Xmas without a Ghost Story (or a Doctor Who special!) – Finish the night with a spooky telling of A Christmas Carol by our own Scrooge – Mr Ebenezer Hicks!
* Nothing Planned yet
* As you were so good at foraging on the Saturday see if you can repeat it on the Sunday!
* A Tea Party with Tea and cake (please bring cake) Party hosted by a Man in a funny Hat so wear a Hat and join in (maybe a small prise for the best hat?)
* Join the Queen for a small game of Croquet on our specially imported indoor crochet lawn
* Being Polite Victorians we will be invited to 'Vacate the premises' (No mucky words at this gathering!) (Pack up the Geeky Tree, collect stuff people brought and depart home.)

"This is by no means a finished or full plan – there is still space in it that we can fill with other stuff – if anybody has ideas or suggestions – shout out and if we can make them happen we will. This is not a Hogswatch and it is not intended as a big even so if you want to come see friends – have fun – great. But if you don't come it's possibly something your life will go on with without. We aren't advertising this big time – it's mainly targeted at the friends who have been gathering for more than 10 years now – to continue doing so..."



The Pratchett Partisans are a fan group who meet monthly at either Brisbane or Indooroopilly to "eat, drink and chat about all things Pratchett. We hold events such as Discworld dinners, games afternoons, Discworld photo scavenger hunts. Our recent 'Murder In Morpork' mystery party was a great night out. With 26 people attending, we had 24 suspects, our special guest – Vetinari, and one dead mime! It was a fun night of food and murder and we are planning another Murder in December so stay tuned. We also attend opening night at Brisbane Arts Theatre's Discworld plays." The Partisans currently have about 100 members who meet at least twice a month, usually in Brisbane.

Here be some upcoming events hosted by the Pratchett Partisans:

Carpe Jugul– Vinum! Halloween Party. Friday 30th Oct 7pm. Lady Margolotta's Castle. Appropriate Halloween/Discworld/Formal attire compulsory. $20 per person: platter food, games, prizes and dessert.

Discworld games afternoon Sat 14 November 2pm-8pm. Community meeting room Brisbane Square library. Drop in during the afternoon for Discworld board and card games, then dinner and drinks starting from 6pm at a local eatery.

Homicide at Hogswatch. Sat 19 December 6pm-10pm. Grand Central Hotel Dining Car. Will another Murder will be committed in Ankh Morpork? More details will be released soon.

For more info about their next meetup, join up at https://www.facebook.com/groups/pratchettpartisans/ or contact Ula directly at uwilmott@yahoo.com.au


The City of Small Gods is a group for fans in Adelaide and South Australia. For more information on their upcoming activities, go to www.cityofsmallgods.org.au

"Every few months, we have a full day's worth of board games at La Scala Cafe, 169 Unley Rd, Unley in the function room starting at 10am."

Upcoming events include:
Nov 15 Chain Maille Workshop (TBC)
Nov 26 Monthly Dinner and Games, Seven Stars Hotel, 187 Angas St
Nov 29 Planning Picnic, Botanic Park, 11.30am
Dec 6 Round World Events SA Annual General Meeting
Dec TBA End of Year Dinner

For more info, go to http://ausdwcon.org/fan-clubs/adelaide/quiz/


The Broken Vectis Drummers meet next on Thursday 5th November 2015 (probably) from 7.30pm at The Castle pub in Newport, Isle of Wight. For more info and any queries, contact broken_vectis_drummers@yahoo.co.uk


The Wincanton Omnian Temperance Society (WOTS) next meets on Friday 6th November 2015 (probably) at Wincanton's famous Bear Inn from 7pm onwards. "Visitors and drop-ins are always welcome!"


The Northern Institute of the Ankh-Morpork and District Society of Flatalists, a Pratchett fangroup, has been meeting on a regular basis since 2005 but is now looking to take in some new blood (presumably not in the non-reformed Uberwald manner). The Flatalists normally meet at The Narrowboat Pub in Victoria Street, Skipton, North Yorkshire, to discuss "all things Pratchett" as well as having quizzes and raffles. Details of future meetings are posted on the Events section of the Discworld Stamps forum:



Sydney Drummers (formerly Drummers Downunder) meet next on Monday 2nd November 2015 at 6.30pm (probably) in Sydney at 3 Wise Monkeys, 555 George Street, Sydney,2000. For more information, contact Sue (aka Granny Weatherwax): kenworthys@yahoo.co.uk


The Treacle Mining Corporation, formerly known as Perth Drummers, meets next on Monday 2nd November 2015 (probably) from 5.30pm at Carpe Cafe, 526 Murray Street, Perth, Western Australia. For details follow Perth Drummers on Twitter @Perth_Drummers or join their Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/Perth.Drummers/ – or message Alexandra Ware directly at <alexandra.ware@gmail.com>



Here be a gem mined from the wilds of Facebook by one of our Newshounds. Marvellous stuff!

Hampus Lybeck of Gothenburg, Sweden started the proceedings with a challenge, "The rule of thumb is that there are limericks you can read with ladies present, limericks you can read with vicars present and then proper limericks." and then offered the first one:

From Lancre (Bad Ass) hailed a witch
Who had an unfortunate glitch
Her time-line bifurcated
And she duplicated
Now her friends can't tell which witch is which.

...and this happened...

Lucie Zeale
There once was a Smith in Bad Ass
With seven fine boys and a lass
A wizard was she
And eventually
she could travel through time to the past.

Sarah Rutherford Smith
There once was a boy from Copperhead
Whose hair was indelibly red.
He enforced the laws,
Loved a girl with four paws
And had irrefutable street cred.

Ruth Leslie
There once was a dashing young author.
Who said to himself "Well I oughta",
bring Disc world to life,
let laughter run rife.
You did good, you well loved old author. Tah dah!

Roger McKillop
There's music frae oor Feegles moond,
whaur drinkin', an' fechtin' aboond,
Wi' a big bottle o' Scumble,
We'll jine in the rumble,
An' hope the roast ship isnae foond!

Dan Ladle
In Ankh-Morpork there was a dictator,
Who preferred to be earlier than later,
He talked to the rats and liked crunching the stat's
On things said at a Square named Sator

Tania Maria Cann Lewis
Headology, said Nanny Ogg
Whilst talking to Gaspode the Dog
Is a load of old Fanny
I leave it to Granny
I prefer just to swig at my grog

Lucie Zeale
There was a man from Llamedos
Who played a fine harp of course
With a dwarf and troll
They made rock and roll
And were the best band there ever was!

There was a wizard in Ankh
A tourist with luggage like a tank
Too far did they roam
From Morporks loam
That straight off of the disc, they sank

Nicole B Hicks
Vimes walks the streets in the night
With nary a crim'nal in sight
The agony aunts
Hung two up, by their pants
And the rest are all hiding, in fright.

The Ankh is a curious river
Not so much a flow, as a quiver
You can skip more than a rock
If you're quick, you can walk
But it smells like a half-rotten liver.

Ruth Leslie
There once was a Magrat from Lancre,
Whose future was looking quite danker.
But she met a fool, who was destined to rule,
and all Verence could do,was to thank her.

Nicole B Hicks
The Alchemist's Guild has gone missing
In a pile of rubble, all hissing
Lots of bricks, I am told,
But none of them gold
So all of us are left wishing.

Monks sew up the trousers of time
Dumping bits in some unvisited clime
The Procrastinator rolls
And the Mandala scrolls
Whilst I fiddle about with this rhyme.

Nigel Finn
Leonard of Quirm was never quite sure,
How to continue limericks after line four,
When asked why this was,
He answered "Because."
Then he became distracted and sketched a detailed drawing of muscles in the human thumb, a nice little invention for keeping cheese at a consistent temperature, and a device for raining down fire on enemy ships.

Hampus Lybeck
A nice young man from Sutton Hoo
Knew a limerick that stopped at line two...

Nigel Finn Oook ook oooook ook ook,
Ook ook, oook ook ook,
ook ook OOK!
ook OOk OOK?
OOK ook OOOOK ook ook!

Nicole B Hicks
Though it looks like a cosmic mistake,
A world, round and flat, like a pancake,
The black-hatted creator,
Gave the Disc no equator,
Tis perfect, it requires no remake.

David Bond
Promotion in the halls of UU,
Was filling the dead men's pointy shoes,
Then along came Ridcully,
A fellow quite jolly,
Now the Bursar hides in the loos.

Nigel Finn
There once was a copper called Vimes,
Who knew he should move with the times,
He employed dwarfs and trolls,
A werewolf, some gargoyles,
And a vampire to help solve some crimes.

Nicole B Hicks
If wishes were horses, we'd ride
On A'tuins back, we'd abide
And while that would be merry
We can all be more Terry
And spread ripples on earth, far and wide.

A photog named Otto loves light
But crumbles away when it's bright
Shriek, if you must
Then sweep up the dust
So he can get the iconograph right

Nigel Finn
A man with a fowl on his head,
Was sick of the rumours they spread,
About a duck on his bonce,
So with much nonchalance,
He'd just reply "What duck?" instead.

Hampus Lybeck
From the town of Ohulan Cutash
(Well, the suburb, Sheepridge, let's not clash)
came a man with a secret
So dreadful you won't hear it
From me without huge loads of cash!

Roger McKillop
Tae write this poem, Daft Wullie wished.
Bit couldnae cause he wis pished!
He's reduced tae a mumble,
By scoffin' mair Scumble,
Than even he could hae wished!

Hampus Lybeck
There once was a young dwarf named Glod.
Through life did he happily plod.
Until this spot of bother;
His 'dad' was his mother
it turned out, or that's what I'm tlod.

Lucie Zeale
there once was a man called Groat
who drank turpentine for his throat
He lived with young Sidney
who was not of that kidney
a knowledge of pins was his boat.

Chris Browne
There once was a Reaper called Mort
Who travelled from Morpork to Tsort
Taking souls without fear
Till a change of career
Made him boss of the Sto Helit court.

There was a young Aching called Tiff
Whose cheeses had started to whiff
She did witchy magic
But the outcome was tragic
When Horace rolled over a cliff.

Nicole B Hicks
Young Sam, it is said, enjoys poo
From animals which quack, oink or moo
When asked about smell
He just said, "Oh well,
I'm from Ankh, it's nothing too new."

Chris Browne
Ponder Stibbons said, wiping his specs
And flexing his magical pecs,
'No cause for alarm
'When splitting the thaum
'I leave all the hard parts to Hex'

Roger McKillop
Moose pipes soond oor warnin' clear,
The big wee Hag's stridin' up here!
She kens aboot the ship,
Wi' her hauns oan her hip,
"A reckonin'" aw' Feegles fear!

Hampus Lybeck
Old women who live in The Shades
have handbags that bristle with blades
for every occasion
from tea to castration
or wanton destruction and raids.

Chris Browne
Jools Stollop was built like a waif
Her beauty assured she was safe
To succeed as a model
On high heels she'd toddle
Wearing micromail frocks (does not chafe)

Hampus Lybeck
Goodie Whemper (Maysherestinpeace)
used research methodologies.
Turned witchcraft into science
despite Granny's annoyance
at their likeness to jommetries.

Nigel Finn
A five part limerick briefly summing up the events of Feet Of Clay;

A dwarf named Cheery Littlebottom
Announced to the room "I have found some
Arsenic that was used
By the person accused
Of killing the priest and Hopkinson"

Old Stoneface remained quite confused
By an overabundance of clues
He couldn't find a link
And he needed a drink
And both those thoughts gave him the blues

Vetinari, meanwhile, remained ill
The thing that poisoned him was still
A mystery to all,
A trained wasp in the wall
Seemed all that could cause it. untill;

"Why hadn't I seen it before!?"
Thought Vimes as he ran to the door,
"The butcher, the baker,
The candle-stick maker!
I've figured it out now, I'm sure!"

Meanwhile Dorfl had helped save the day
Which provoked Captain Carrot to say
"Let's reward this beings acts,
Since he stopped the attacks
By destroying the clay of his clay."

Roger McKillop
"Bit it wisnae an Aitken ship!"
Said Rob wi' tremulous lip.
Fir oor mutton roast,
He ken't he wis toast,
She'd a skillet firm in her grip!

Roger McKillop
The Big Yan an' Rob were lampooned,
An' liftit high aff the groond,
Thus Tiff made her point,
Ower the stolen lamb joint,
As oor lads landed an' mooned!

Nicole B Hicks
Things get cold on Cori Celesti
Bring wool socks, and a double thick vesty
Please don't anger Fate
You won't like him irate
And no priest on the Disc will dare bless thee.

There once was a crook called von Lipwig
On the end of a rope he danced a jig
An angel helped Moist
Slip from the joist
And got him an honest to gods gig.

Hampus Lybeck
A young lad from Pseudopolis
gave demonology a whiz
wished for long life and beauty
and chestfuls of booty
got a wizzard instead, what a miss!



It seems that Moving Pictures' alchemists were echoing Roundworld history...

"When you played billiards during the early days of plastic, you took your life into your hands. Under the right circumstances, your bank shot could cause a ball to explode.

"Billiards played an important role in driving the development of synthetic plastic. In the Victorian era, billiard balls were made of ivory, a material created from carved tusks. But some feared (perhaps erroneously) that ivory's popularity was going to lead to a shortage of the material, as elephants would be hunted to near extinction. They were onto something — but it wouldn't happen for decades.

"Phelan and Collender, a major billiard table manufacturer, offered a $10,000 reward to any person who could make a non-ivory billiard ball. In 1869, an inventor named John Wesley Hyatt came up with a solution. He mixed nitrocellulose with alcohol and a waxy resin called camphor, and molded it into a ball that looked and felt a lot like ivory. This material, patented as Celluloid and later used for artificial dental plates, was the first mass-market synthetic plastic, launching what became known as the Age of Plastics. Unfortunately, nitrocellulose is also called guncotton, and it's combustible. It explodes so rapidly that it doesn't typically set anything on fire, but it can burst into flame and make a loud bang. And in boozy 19th-century pool halls, that was not such a great idea..."




The excellent Kokay Maramot has some further Pratchett thoughts...

On Where's My Cow:

"My first story as a child was told to me by my father. I was probably the same age as Young Sam (in Where's My Cow). I remember the nights, inside my parent's room in our small starter home. My father would read it to me again, over and over – the tale of how the animals from all over the world, walked by pair inside Noah's Ark. To a child's imagination, the arc bent space and time, it was infinitely large inside! There came the largest elephant, the fiercest lions, the birds, the dogs, cats, probably a kangaroo hopped inside too, but at the age of one, the only exotic animal I could fit inside it were ducks and rats. My mother bought me a duck and a rat one day from some church vendor. One day, both disappeared. No, they didn't die, I would have remembered. Probably went and freed themselves in search of Noah's Ark. Every capricious kid must've been as wicked as Egypt's King Ramses!... I remember my father, patient man that he is, reading Noah's ark many times in one night. My mother was probably relieved that I was nagging someone else during bedtime! My parents celebrated their 28th wedding anniversary last May 17th! They should be congratulated!

"Noah's Ark must have been a big hit for a child of one, but it could be trying to fathers (and mothers) all over the world. So, Terry Pratchett, being a genius (as this site attest to the many books I've reviewed) released a truly interactive approach to the usual animal bedtime story with a twist in Where's My Cow? It is a plus if your household loves the Discworld series and is familiar with one of its heroes – Sir Samuel Vimes, Knight, Duke and Commander of Discworld's fictional police force..."


On reading Pratchett on public transport:

Got on the bus at around 10pm today. I had to finish a few things in the office and extended my hours. The bus I got on was a one year old yellow skinned smelly creature. At one year old, it's cleaner than most buses in the metro, but that doesn't mean it's on top condition. The aircon is busted and the cover seats are muddied. For two hours this will be my shell because it's going to be a turtle soon when it hits EDSA- the longest, most crowded and, most dreaded pass any Filipino commuter had to endure every day. Anyway, I've learned to shun all the noise and distraction by plugging my headphones and playing some music from my phone while reading. When I'm feeling confident and focused, I could do without the headphones and would read all the way through the ride without breaking my concentration. All the way through the ride is almost two hours of squeezing in a crowded world of people who looks like they had a long day and would like it to end as soon as possible. The bus crawled anyway... As I read I Shall Wear Midnight, I had to stop and look out the bus window and not look anyone directly in the eye or they will see tears flowing from behind my glasses. When I read Terry Pratchett, I am reminded of the people in my hometown, in this city, in this country. I am reminded of my old grand aunt, living alone in her house, burgled just a few days ago. I am reminded of the 44 police officers who died in an encounter with the rebels in my country at Mamasapano, Maguindanao. I am reminded of the people who doesn't know the sophisticated words to make sense of this new world. I am reminded of my father and mother. The people I ride the bus everyday who had to endure buses like this. No other author has made me glance thoughtfully at strangers before..."


From Pratchett Job, one blogger's ultimate top ten:

"Consider the output of your average author, who writes a handful of books over the course of their career. That's impressive in itself, hell, being able to get your book snapped up by an agent, skip through the minefield of the acquisition, editing, marketing and publicity processes before spotting your novel in your local Waterstones makes you The Big (Wo)Man in my eyes. Pratchett did this repeatedly. Several times a year for many years. While working on countless other things, raising a family, having hobbies. How? Seriously, how? And that's before we start discussing the quality of his books. This top 10 is Pratchett's zenith. Imagine being in the position where you are writing Small Gods and know you have something golden on your hands. Then doing it again. And again..."

The list includes Going Postal, The Last Hero. The Fifth Elephant, Pyramids, Small Gods, Lords and Ladies, Maskerade, Feet of Clay, Night Watch, and Thief of Time. This list and his reasons for his choices may not match your own, but it makes for a fascinating piece.




Some photos of a very pleased Paul Kidby with his Discworld baron, which fetched £5,000 for the Trussell Trust:

...and here is the Discworld Baron in his new home, the Queen's Head

Sybil Ramkin and Errol, from the recent Harbour Theatre production of Guards! Guards!, nails the look:

...and the dragon-o-lantern carved for the production:

...and a selection of iconographs from the production:

Gaspode and Laddie, drawn by the very talented Amy Simmonds:

The cast of Wyrd Sisters from this recent production by the Twin Lakes Playhouse of Mountain Home, Arkansas, has a definite Scottish Play look:

Paul Kidby's "American Gothic" colour portrait of Bill Door and Miss Flitworth:

Some very good Discworld fanart by Peter Klijn:

And finally, a bijou diamond – Sir Pterry pictured with the Errol created for the first production of Guards! Guards! Photo courtesy of Stephen Briggs on the internet:



News coming soon about a new – additional – Wossname format will be... well... coming soon! There may even be another October post. Watch this space...

– Annie Mac


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